JAMEELA: January 3, 2021
Hello everyone,
I am a Muslim girl want to marry a hindu married men double of my age he is mine best friend father we love each other a lot. He is ready to divorce his wife n want to marry me but I really don’t want that because I don’t want to spoil his 1st wife n there children life I am ready to share him with her but he is marwadi hindu my parents will kill me if I say my love story to them…I can’t live without him and I don’t want to do suicide I know many will say it’s just and attraction nothing else but we both know how much we love each other my love story is so true as my blood so kind request admin and other brothers and sister to help me to get out of this problem.
More information: Hindu-Muslim Marriage, Sharia, Muslim-Hindu marriages, Hindu-Muslim lovers’ experiences, Koran on Hindus? Hindu girl-Muslim boy, Marriage & Divorce laws.
Return to Home, Blogs, How to Share? Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, Book, Media.
Stupidity knows no bound. Get a life .
Dear Jameela,
Aren’t you a home- breaker already by having an affair with a married man in the first place? Leave him, become independent, look for a boy without baggage and you’ll be happier in life.
Dear shweta,
Love is blind it can happen with anyone I don’t why but I feel safe and happy when he is around it’s like I am on seventh sky when he touch me I don’t think so I can feel the same with any one else. The tag of home- breaker that’s what I don’t want to get for my self and that is the reason I came here to get a good advise..😔
Jameela, I’d guess you are in your late teens/early twenties. Please focus on learning skills that you can use to stand on your feet . Please don’t set yourself up for abuse for a lifetime. What the man did, he should not have done, cheating on anyone is not fair. If this things get disclosed, the guy won’t bat an eyelid and put all the blame(of seducing) on you.
Aditi thanks for advise.
But he is not like that he very soft spoken a very gentle person I have never seen him got angry. I trust him n he do so my best friend (his daughter) knows everything. We are not in talking terms now but she supports her father indirectly.
Jameela, I am glad that you feel loved in the relationship. I know it’s a great feeling! 🙂 If you keep your relationship with him and he remains committed to his current family, I guess that’s what you are planning, how will you support yourself for life? Whatever you choose to do, please keep working towards self dependence so that you control your life. Love is just an aspect of life not the life itself!
Also, try to fast forward and look 10 years ahead. In 10 years, where do you want to see yourself
1. A self dependent confident woman vs a women who didn’t focus on career and self dependence at right time.
2. A women wanting a child but can’t have it because she is in a secret relationship vs a women who is confidently ready for a child?
If the guy is not happy with his wife, he should be honest to her and should do the right thing by divorcing her right now instead of riding in two boats. You should focus on studies , keep a platonic relationship if breaking up is not possible. Also try to see what being married to a man from a different religion will mean to you and him.
Dear aditi sister thank you ones again and glad you are helping me a lot to be clear.
Just one think can any one guarantee me that he or me can live till next 10year?
What if I or him die in next few year ?
Do you think a couple should die or end there relationship like this?
If he loves me a lot then afcours he is not happy with his present partner.
I am thankful to you. You are giving me a great advises and you are also right but thing from my side mam.
My mind is running out two side one I am n adult and can think about self. Another, over confidence that I will keep every one happy my becoming his second wife..😔
I am glad Jameela that I am able to help you a little here. As a young adult, I too was in a relationship, so I know how you feel right now.
No one can guarantee life or for that matter death! But in all probabilities if you are a healthy adult, probability is that you will still be alive in 10 years 🙂 Life is an immense possibility Jameela, why would you want to end it!
Being a second wife is not a possibility legally for a Hindu man. Try talking to your boyfriend about all this. What will he do to give you a respectable life? Would getting a second wife be fair to his first wife? Being a Hindu women she never even considered this possibility.
I would recommend that for next few years you focus on your career, and let him figure out his issues with his wife to be available for marrying you at a later point.
If he sorts everything out, will his family accept you? Will religious differences mean anything to you both? What will be future of your kids?
If he is serious and a calm adult, he should be able to think through it all and create right conditions for you and be brave enough to separate from his wife who he is not happy with.
I am asking you to take these tough steps right now as more you get invested , harder puzzle of life becomes to solve. I was in love and broken once, but really happy with my life today, more than I could ever imagine. Life is an immense possibility! Don’t give up! Loads of love..!!! If his love is true he will make things right , if not be strong to take control of your life !
Dear Jameela, please take some time to think through all these and do not rush. Life is very precious and long. We are glad you reached out to us.
You said you truly loves him, does he also has the same love for you? If yes, ask him to inform about your love to his Hindu wife and your Muslim parents. He is an adult and it should be his responsibility to take care of these matters. Ask him and let us know what he says.
It is important for you to marry someone who is honest in general. If he is already married and have a wife and children of your age, why he is fooling around with other young girls? If this man of such character, would you not feel hurt when some 20 years after your marriage, he finds another young girl to love with? We understand you are in love with him, but he is a man of low character and an opportunist.
You said “I am ready to share him with her”, but that is not a legal option or practice for Hindus. Let’s assume your parents agreed to your marriage, but his wife will not. The divorce proceeding may drag on for several years and your case will be in media and in public for years before you can legally marry him. Are you ready for such a reality of your life?
Please get back to us for more questions, thank you.
Dear admin,
We are in relationship since 2years it’s not possible which you are saying me to do bcoz no one will agree from my family or his family except her daughter.. please try to understand my situation I didn’t came her to get some comments and get happy no my problem is my love which I can’t live without n he loves me the same n he never did any bad things with me or just play with my feelings or my body, if he would want to just time pass he should have use me but he never did that. He is so loving and caring person he loves me a lot I can’t see my self in other’s hand dear…😔
I don’t no what I am saying but that’s all my feeling for me…😢
Thank you
Thank you Jameela for reaching out to us. Good to hear that “he never did any bad things with me or just play with my feelings or my body”, that is admirable. You said, “I am on seventh sky when he touch me”, we have concern with this because it may be a matter of time he may cross the border/limit. What did he said or do so you can say with confidence that “he loves me”? What do you think is the solution for “no one will agree from my family or his family”? Are you okay to live in the same state of life, plutonic love (but without touching), for next 5-10 years? Does this relationship affecting your studies?
Admin,
Your points are breaking me….😢 so in that case no one should love a hindu married men bcoz is he already married he/she doesn’t have ❤️ Now to feel in love again and about family your there servant they will choice a men for you but we should not think that the same love we will get from that person bcoz it was family selection. If I am ready to be his second wife and want to have a family then it’s wrong bcoz that is my choice . Wow that isn’t self independent.
Jameela: Any married Hindu women, will not tolerate her husband to have a relationship outside marriage. Monogamy is basic expectation in a Hindu wedding and for that matter any wedding in non-Muslim countries(India has expectation for Muslim men). If he is serious about relationship with you, he should divorce his current wife and get out of wedlock to marry you. If he doesn’t do that, you cannot be his legal wife, and you and your children can suffer immensely. Watch this movie called Zakhm if you can.
I meant ‘exception’ for Muslim men not expectation.
Dear Jameela, we are just pointing you out some points to think. It’s your life and you can progress as you wish. There are certain laws by local government (where ever you are) and there are certain local customs. It is not that you have to follow them but not following may bring additional difficulties in your life.
Sometime it is better to help others and you may find answers to your own situation. What would you say to Jain girl whose mother fall in love with a Muslim boyfriend? Can you help this girl by telling her few words to help her situation? Get back to her at https://interfaithshaadi.org/my-mom-married-to-my-muslim-friend/
I am a 23 year old Muslim girl in USA(Indian) and I love a Hindu boy from India. I know him since my 12th grade and in a relationship for the past 3 years. My family moved to the US 7 years ago.
I am not a very religious person. I believe in one god and respect all religions. I am financially independent and I live by myself and can even take of another person. The person I love is also 23, a graduate and is working right now. I don’t know how to convince my parents. Even though I am independent I am scared and stressed about this situation. My parents are not the 5 times praying muslims or very very religious people but when it comes to topics like these they would talk like it is against Allah and the religion also they would ask how can we ever go back to our country and show them our faces.
My parents till now have no idea that I am in a relationship now. I am really scared and stressed about this whole situation. My partner is also not a very religious person and is ok to convert as the last option to convince my parents. His family is happy with us. We will live in the US after marriage.
Reply at https://interfaithshaadi.org/hindu-and-muslim-lovers-are-not-religious/