Here, a church is demanding a Hindu girl friend to sign a pre-nup that their children would be raised in Christian faith only and if not, his parents would be punished by the church, like stopped holy communion and after death burial rights. Is this not injustice to innocent lovers?
Tejas says: March 18, 2013 at 3:30 am
Although, they have not forced me to convert, they insist on us getting married in the church only and to have Hindu ceremonies in secrecy which is upsetting me and my parents.
I have spoken with the church representatives, and have been informed that though there is no need for me to be baptised i would have to sign a pre-nup that our children would be raised in christian faith.
I have been informed by my boyfriend and the church that if i do not follow up a christian wedding after our civil marriage (by special marriage act) and do not sign the pre-nup, his parents would be punished by the church and that their rights would be stopped like holy communion and after death burial rights.
I feel pressurized by these circumstances and do not understand what to do? Please guide. -Tejas
Admin says:
Tejas,
Now you are at a right place for guidance. You will not find similar guidance any other place. Your’s is a typical story for us and that is why we have made this web site. We are working hard to make this World a better place to live for all. Just hang on with us. Educate yourself here.
We believe in Jesus but not the Church, we believe in Allah but not Muhammad, we believe in LORD God but do not see why a Hindu considering marriage with a Jew has to have Bar Mitzvah for the interfaith children to announce them Jews. This BBS is sin created by religious institutions for their survival, nothing more.
For now, just tell the church to go to hell. Clarify that YOU WILL NOT SIGN THIS PRE-NUP, NEVER EVER, not in this life! Tell them that their issue, “his parents would be punished by the church and that their rights would be stopped like holy communion and after death burial rights” is THEIR issue, you have nothing to do with it. If any religious institution is so RIGID and controlling, why they want to be a part of it? Ask them to change the church.
Tejas, do not be convinced by the old trick of playing innocent. Everyone uses that. If after living with the same parents and community for most of his life, your boy friend should have known of his parents and church’s expectations. If he has not, then you have the right to question his intelligence. Now deal with him tough. Tell the boyfriend to stop dreaming about you and stop talking to him. Do not accept his phone calls and texts. Completely ignore him. Soon, he will realize reality and will come to terms. Remember, NO BBS.
Hypothetically, lets assume you loved a rich, handsome and highly educated Hindu guy from your community and in the end he asks you for Rs. 1 lakh dowry as a part of marriage condition just to please his parents, what would you do? Even your parents may pressure you to agree to give this small fund, but you will be alarmed by the junwani (old timer) thinking and will terminate this marriage agreement, correct? If yes, why will you agree to give away your 1000 generations of Hindu heritage and pride as dowry just to please their church?
Tell him that this will be your life: First, you will get married in the same location and time, under Jesus and Krishna’s photos, by both Hindu and Christian ceremonies, and in presence of all relatives from both sides. After that, in your home, both the Bible and Geeta will be sitting side by side and children will learn from both. When our children will be 21, they will declare their own faith, what ever that is. Tejas, tell us what is wrong with this; is this not beautiful? If you be soft to them, you will end up living the life of Hinu.
Read all we have written and come back to us with more questions. Best wishes. -Admin
Tejas says: March 19, 2013 at 4:03 am
Dear Admin
Thank you for giving me confidence to do the right thing.
Both of us have this beautiful vision of living a full life without any hindrance from religious fanaticism. However, it seems the religious institutions are holding our parents at ransom here and indirectly black mailing us into falling in line with their ideologies. If i do it now, i fear i would always fall prey to it. I am waiting for my boy friend to clear things with his church and parents, and if needed take a stand, which would make things clear for me in more than one way.
In any case, i would not take a decision out of guilt or pressure. Regards – Tejas
“Your religion is like your mother. Just because your intended spouse is demanding that you adopt your mother-in-law as your dear mother, you are not going to abandon your birth mother!” -Mahatma Gandhi’s statement revised.
More information: Interfaith marriage with equality, Hindu-Christian Marriage, Bible on Hindus? Christian-Hindu relationships, Marriage & Divorce laws.
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Hi Admn.
The Imperial State religion of Christianity, commonly known as “Christianity” was founded by Emperor Constantine I in 326 following the 1st Council of Nicaea (325). While technically extinct for nearly 800 years, the Christian Church was restored in the election of a leader consistent with the original doctrine and requirements from the time of Constantine in the election of Pope Francis on March 14th 2013.
The original Imperial documents of these proceedings were stolen from the Imperial Archives upon the conquest and destruction of Constantinople in 1096 by Roman Cult Leader Pope Urban II and taken back to Rome. The originals were reputed to still be in existence until the 14th Century. However, it is not known if these documents remain in possession at the Vatican Secret Archives. All subsequent documents published since the 12th Century have contained deliberate inclusions and falsities by the leaders of the Roman (Catholic) Cult and therefore cannot be considered authentic.
Contrary to the revisionist claims of christian churches that the concept of christians has existed since the time of Nero (1st Century), there is no credible independent evidence of the word being used prior to the universal unified religion created by Constantine via Nicaea in 325.
Nor does there exist one single piece of credible untampered original evidence to prove that Rome even had a functioning “christian” type sect at the time of the Council of Nicaea. In fact, the evidence is overwhelming that precisely at the time Constantine created christianity as the official religion of the Empire, Rome was undergoing a pagan revival on Vatican Hill as a major pagan shrine.
Christina,
Thanks for sharing. Most of Eastern people believe that Jesus started Christianity and that is not true. The Bible believers claim that is a direct message by LORD God, further that is not true.
We love what Jesus said, but not what John, Peter, Paul and others changed into the Bible. That is why we always recommend to follow Jesus not churches.
Please come back to guide others.
Dear Admin
Thank you for giving me confidence to do the right thing.
Both of us have this beautiful vision of living a full life without any hindrance from religious fanaticism. However, it seems the religious institutions are holding our parents at ransom here and indirectly black mailing us into falling in line with their ideologies. If i do it now, i fear i would always fall prey to it. I am waiting for my boy friend to clear things with his church and parents, and if needed take a stand, which would make things clear for me in more than one way.
In any case, i would not take a decision out of guilt or pressure.
regards
Tejas
Stay firm. This is not your problem nor you created this problem. The bf never disclosed all these before thus it is his fault.
Make sure you do not marry into that family who is going to curse you whole your life. Take a year or more for the things to settle down.
Agree to all what you said, “If i do it now, i fear i would always fall prey to it.” -you must do it now (NO BBS) and “i would not take a decision out of guilt or pressure”, -absolutely true, this is not your creation, this is a problem created by their rigid church.
The bf has to make up his mind if he loves his church or to you.
Please, please keep us posted.
By the way, we are very proud of you. You are lots mature and smart. You believe in doing things that are right, and that is a key to long-lasting happiness.
Somebody has to challenge the irrational churches. You are a role model for other oppressed women. If you don’t mind, please go tell it to the World, post this page URL on your Facebook, give the URL to your bf, your family and all your common friends. Pressure him to do ethical things.
We hope your bf will select you over his church!
I cannot believe that I find myself suddenly in the throws of a interfaith standoff. Mine (like many) is a long story. But in a nutshell, tonight I was asked “to throw away my idols and accept the only way to God is through Christ or we can be no more then acquaintances.”
Unbelievable how little true “research” was done into her “new found” beliefs.
“I dont believe in what Buddhists say.”
What do they say? Where did you read it? “dont remember”
“I dont believe we are equally yolked”
what do you mean “yolked”? “like an egg”
GIVE ME A BREAK.
I have my hands full. This is tip of the iceberg. Searching for a group of sane people that can guide me through this troubled times I am having.
I am a Vedantic, or call me Dharmic, whatever you want. I know there is one and only infinite energy that pervades all. That there is one Holy Spirit, one Atman, one Chi. One Allah. and throughout the ages we have had different interpretations of this energy, ways of explaining it through the ages. individuals with so much of the pure energy in them that, they themselves can be said to be incarnate of embodiment of God. Buddha, Krishna, Christ. Does not matter. Choose what you wish or skip completely and focus straight to the Holy Energy/Atman/Brahman is you are so inclined and able.
All the rest, the revisions of texts, commandments, churches, golden temples, mosques, crooked yogis, etc are all in it more either name, fame, power, or riches. All opportunistic leaches of the ultimate truth.
THESE ARE MY BELIEFS.
HERS?
Suddenly “born again” Christian. Essentially no religion until 3 months ago. Has no guide or church or teacher except her father. Struggles through the bible on her own and uses the writings of Ellen White when confused. discusses with nobody except her father. All this new. Does not care to discuss principles, values, character, etc — just the cookbook side of religion. And I just refused to accept this.
We are now at impasse and I am devastated.
help
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