Hindu: I have agreed for conversion to Christianity

tejashree says: April 20, 2014 at 12:50 pm

Hi. I m a Hindu girl and I am dating an east Indian roman catholic guy for last 9 years.

I am not very religious. My parents also are quite open minded and like d guy. However his parents have only agreed for our marriage because I have agreed for conversion. They also told me that if I am not willing to convert then I should forget about him.

He also is not very religious. Though he goes to church and all only to please his parents. He says that he tried convincing his parents for me to not convert but his parents are adamant.

My parents are obviously not happy with the fact that I am going to convert. Now the problem is I don’t mind converting as I don’t believe anyway. But his parents are sweetly forcing me to follow each n every thing related to Christianity. I never even followed my religion.

He does not get to have his say at all. Though he believes against conversion he is not making a proper stand. Also the conversion is a lengthy process. I tried to convince them against conversion but they are adamant. He is a good guy but does not want to go against his parents.

And I feel just because my parents are lenient giving in and making them unhappy.. Is it right? If I give in now I may not even get to have a say later.

Plus they want a typical catholic style wedding.. I want a court wedding. Please advise. -tejashree

Admin says:

Dear Tejashree,

You have summarize your dilemma well. You are smart enough to see that this is completely a wrong proposition. However you are in love and looking for a happy middle ground.

We have started this non-profit web site for innocent victims just like you. Lets work to gather over a few months to make sure you know what exactly you are getting into.

Very first and most important point is … you boyfriend is playing “an innocent game”. We have written this earlier, “Q: I didn’t know before but just do to please my parents. Answer: Do not be convinced by the old trick of playing innocent. Everyone uses that. If after living with the same parents and community for most of their life, he or she should have known of their parents and community’s expectations. If he/she had not, then you have the right to question his or her intelligence.” As much as you may love him and you will not like what we will tell you but that guy has cheated and deceived you for last 9 years. Akansha‘s boyfriend also played the same innocent game, and now is too late for Nusrat.

Please let us know what baptism means to you? The way you are raising questions today, we have concern that this conversion and what to follow later will bother you after marriage. One day you could be in shoes of Hinu. What will you teach about God to your daughter? Are you concerned? Lets talk more. We are waiting! -Admin

Hinu says: April 20, 2014 at 8:32 pm
Dear Tejashree,

Same thing has happened with me (https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=1249). He wants to marry you so he is showing that he doesn’t care with religion and conversion. He will change after marriage. Conversion is first step. Once you will marry him, you have to do everything step by step.

I know its hard for you to leave him because you are in love. Few years before, I was in same situation and end up with marring him. I spend years behind him, plus money, stress etc.

We always take advantage of our parents goodness.

Getting divorcee label is lot of pain that I am facing today. If I would be there instead of you and already know about someones experience then I would never have married to him.

Today you have asked for advice why? Because you are unsure for the success of this marriage. Big advice to you, never take any life changing decision if you are unsure or unclear for the decision.

You have 9 years or whole life, its up to you what you want to save.

Be practical.

Good luck, -Hinu

More information: Interfaith marriage with equality, Hindu-Christian Marriage, Bible on Hindus? Christian-Hindu relationships, Marriage & Divorce laws.
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