VISHNU says: December 20, 2021
I am a Hindu boy. I am in love with AG Christian girl. We love each other, but we are not sure how to proceed further to marriage due to difference in our faiths. I am ready to go to church with her and read bible along with her without converting to her religion.
But she is not ready to participate in Hindu rituals. She says she couldn’t accept other Gods other than Jesus and also she is not used to idol and photo worships. She didn’t ask me to convert to a Christian because she believes it should not be forced but out of my own will I should convert. So if I convert to a Christian (but I don’t want to), there are chances her parents may accept me, and also she wants her kid to be in her own faith.
However, I don’t want to blame her for she’s not able to accept other gods, because she’s a religious Christian herself and it’s very difficult for her to adapt as this what she has been taught all these years. So we have decided to stop talking and part our ways, but it’s very difficult for us to do so.
Can someone help us what other options are available for us to live together?
More information: Hindu Pre-Nuptial agreement, Interfaith marriage with equality, Hindu-Christian Marriage, Bible on Hindus? Christian-Hindu relationships, Marriage & Divorce laws.
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I understand your position Vishnu. As a person who’s going through the same situation i can provide some general information and suggestions that may be helpful to you.
Firstly, it’s important to understand that interfaith relationships can be challenging, especially when it comes to marriage and raising children. You and your partner may have different beliefs, values, and practices, which can create tension and conflict. It’s important to have open and honest communication about your expectations and concerns, and to respect each other’s beliefs and boundaries.
One option you may consider is seeking guidance from a religious leader or a marriage counselor who has experience working with interfaith couples. They can help you navigate the challenges and explore potential solutions that are respectful of both your faiths. They can also help you identify areas of common ground and shared values, which can help you build a strong foundation for your relationship.
Another option is to consider a civil marriage or a non-religious ceremony that is meaningful to both of you. This can allow you to honor your love and commitment without compromising your religious beliefs. It’s important to note, however, that some families may not accept this type of marriage, and you should be prepared to face potential backlash and criticism.
Ultimately, the decision to continue or end your relationship is a personal one, and it’s important to do what feels right for you. If you decide to part ways, it’s important to do so with respect and kindness, and to acknowledge the positive aspects of your relationship. You may also want to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist to help you cope with the emotional challenges of a breakup.
You both made a wise and mature decision. She would have demanded conversion of you and your children one way or another. Christians are bigots at heart and Jesus is the manifestation of their resentments. Their hatred of Hindus is total. Every Sunday in their churches they preach our genocide.
There are Christian bigots but it is in fact in Christian countries where religious minorities, women, atheists and homosexuals have more rights. Christians believe in a God that includes three persons (like the trimurti), and a myriad of saints. Therefore, its monotheism is a source of integration of many beliefs.
Once I heard a Buddhist in Ladakh saying that if someone believing in a Deity of rivers is more keen to keep rivers free of pollution, we should not stand against such believe. I could not agree more.
Monotheism could be good in the sense that we all share the same God. However, it could also be a source of dictatorship: one God, one true and all disagreement with a monolithic true is a mistake. Or a crime.
Saints provide a source of democracy, as polytheism does. There are multiple ways and multiple opinions. Not just one.
Something I like about Christianity is the idea of imperfection. We are all sinners and we should regard our own behaviour before judging others. We are made to commit mistakes because it is part of our learning and because nobody is perfect. We should just try to be kind, to be good with other people, and think that we are all equal in nature. So, Christians have had many great queens, unlike Muslim kingdoms.
Some Christians invented racism to create an exception for anti-slavery rules, as Europe had replaced slavery with serfdom. Christians were surrounded by Muslim kingdoms having slave trade as one of their main sources of profit. Some thought that such business opportunity could not be missed.
Christians also had a sort of caste system with three orders, with members of the nobility and the clergy having more rights than traders or peasants. However, they hardly had a caste of untouchables because Jesus promoted kindness toward the poorest and lowest members of the society, a bit like Gautama five centuries before him.
Hinduism, on the other hand, generated a rationalist school of thought, the Charvaka, which is quite similar to Western rationalism. So, there is some common ground to nurture a set of beliefs.
Vishnu, it this not insane to think your and my god, when there is only one God? Explain her that Hindu are not idol worshippers but Hindus have liberty to express God in any number of ways. A Hindu can see God in any number of forms, including sun and moon, but that is not mandatory. While meditation, a Hindu may not think of any form and can focus on that Ultimate. Why using a form is wrong? If so, why Christians have cross and statue of Mary?
We found that these Christians are not following Jesus but their church. Please read my book Interfaith Marriage: Share and Respect with Equality and it may help you explain to her and win her love back.
Let us know what is your current status. Best wishes.