Section 3.16: I Am Not My Wife’s Husband!

Section 3.16: I Am Not My Wife’s Husband!

Ron says:


Anyone contemplating marriage to a member of an Abrahamic faith is fooling himself or herself if they believe there will not be difficulty. It is a game of “High Stakes Poker.” You cannot see which cards are in the hands of in-laws, neighbors, acquaintances, church members etc. Certainly, you cannot see the future and the circumstances that may appear. Eventually, you may find yourself opposed by your spouse with the encouragement of allies within their church. Don’t be surprised when your marriage is stressed beyond all prior limitations. After children manifest, the “Stakes” will grow exponentially as others scheme behind your back to get your children into church, Sunday school and Bible camp.

Welcome to my world. My wife and I were married in a civil ceremony in the judge’s chambers at a local courthouse. We agreed to not push our beliefs on each other. Eventually, these things changed. We had children. Neighbors, who initially accepted my family, now only speak with my wife. She is a member of their church. My children and I are treated as “Heathens.” A church official once told me that I was not recognized as my wife’s husband because I was not a church member and as such could not be her spouse. Neighbors have asked our children: “Why don’t you go to church?” One man came into our yard when he saw my 10-year-old son alone. This man was upset that my son was not attending church. To my son’s credit, he told the man to mind his own business. After years of being pressured to conform to the likes of them, we now ignore their existence as much as they ignore ours. —Ron

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