my (Christian) parents do not want a Hindu marriage ritual

sourav says: December 24, 2012 at 3:26 pm

Dear Amita,

I am very glad to hear about your interfaith married life of 24 years. I need your help in my case if you can.

I am a Protestant Christian. My fiancée is a Hindu girl. We are about the get married. Our families have resented to our commitments to each other and thus our marriage talks are going on..Except there is a big issue.

The problem is that the girl’s parents wants that the marriage rituals be held in both Hindu and Christian marriage rituals. While my parents state that they do not want a Hindu marriage ritual to be performed at all. Even they have stated that if they will have to cancel our marriage in a church so that the girl’s parents cannot pressurise for a Hindu marriage; they will do so and marriage will be made by court (marriage registrar).

How do I convince them to go for both the marriage rituals (Hindu and Christian) so that the girl’s parents are not offended and ultimately we can get married.

Please help. -Sourav

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Admin says:

Sourav,

Are you financially independent? If you have to go against your parents, can you do that? After the marriage, do the girl have to come and live with you Christian parents? If you are dependent on your parents, you have deeper trouble waiting for you.

Considering you are trying to resolve all matters, also decide now on one of the most important question, do your children have to get baptized to announce them christians?

First you have to understand why your parents do not want the Hindu rituals. Have you read Bible? Do you believe in it? Please read all articles suggested below and make up your mind what Christianity means to you. Ask your girl friend to also read on her own to help her know what she is getting into.

Postpone the marriage for a year to decide what you want to do. It is easy to get married but very difficult to maintain the marriage, especially after children. Divorces are more expensive and painful than marriage, so do not rush into any easy fix. Best wishes. – Admin

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sourav says: December 25, 2012 at 3:09 am
Dear Admin,

A Merry Christmas to you.

Thanks for the quick response.

Now to answer your questions, I am financially independent. I am staying away from my parents for the past 9 years (only visiting on occasions)and settled in a different city for job constraints; so after marriage my wife will not be staying with my parents but with me only. I have already taken my first step to go against my parents that is they always wanted me to get married to a Christian girl which did not happen, next they wanted my present girl to get baptised which I had opposed to and they have agreed to it.

Next thing is that I would want my children to first understand the meaning of baptism which will happen only after they attain a certain age of understanding. It should be their sole decision, cause you cannot force anyone to follow a religion. This is also against the law of the country.

Yes, I have read the Bible and I do believe in it bit only some parts of it cause there are may controversial topics which cannot be solved or provided the correct answers to.

I am in a real fix as I don’t know how to go with this. I have no issues getting married in both rituals, but my parents are in no way going allow the same, which might create a rift between the two families and ultimately, my marriage might not happen at all. –Sourav
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Admin says:

Saurav, we feel your pain. These man-made religions are creating lots of problems for today’s modern youths considering interfaith marriage. Your situation is not unique. Considering you are financially independent and thus you are free to do what ever is right thing to do. Parents will have to get around, if not for marriage, they will ultimately learn to face the fact and settle for it.

Now you have to decide what is right and what is wrong. You are intelligent and a critical thinker. We read Bible too and found three chapters of direct messages by Jesus superb. He changed the second commandment of Jealous God to love thy neighbor, how beautiful! We high recommend you to follow “direct” messages of Jesus and ignore the churches (read Baptism). Learn to be a pluralist. Do that the whole India and World will be proud of you.

Let us know what did you decided to do and keep us posted over years. Best wishes. -Admin.

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Also read:
Hindu-Christian Marriage
Will Gandhi go to Hell since he was not Baptized?
Idol-Worshippers
I am a Christian mother
I converted without knowledge of my family
I am Christian getting married to a Hindu
Do all Christians go to Heaven?
Ignorent Molly trying to convert a Krishna believer to Christianity ..a video
Namastey London movie…intolerant Christians ..a video
All religions are not same
A Hindu America?
Why I am a Hindu?
A fundamentalist Christian
Why I came back to Hinduism?
Dharma is not the same as religion
Text book on How to convert Hindu Students to Christianity

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