Khurshida says: October 12, 2012 at 1:10 am
Hi Admin,
I am Khurshida from asian muslim country. My father is a hard core islamist. I have studied with non-muslim guys in a western country and got influenced by their life styles, behaviour and food habits, simpleness, liberal and respectuful.
I am in the final year of master degree in electronics and also working in a company on part time basis. In the same company met with a Hindu boy, who is my immediate boss. I am in love with him and he wants to marry me without chaninging any one of us our religion. He is smart, loving, well mannered and pleasing personality. Soon I shall be getting full time job on regular basis in the same company.
My parents are not against my working but they want to marry me in the muslim community only. I have observed that muslim guys are not compatible with my education or in the life style. They are mostly islamists, believing restrictions on females. That I donot like. I wish to live gracefully and respectfully.
The Hindu boy is 100% compatible as my life partner. Two times I have gone with him on tour to other country, and found him very loving and caring. Though we remained together 4 nights in the hotel on tour, he did not attempt to have sex with me, prior to marriage. He enjoys confidence and reputation in the eyes of top management of the company. I have made up my mind that I shall marry him only as we cannot live without each other now.
Seeking positive comments from readers. -Khurshida
Admin says:
Khurshida,
Interfaith marriages are too complex and is not for everyone. If all other characteristics are same, arrange-choiced marriages are better than the love marriage (read Fathima). So do not stereotype that “They (Muslim boys) are mostly islamists, believing restrictions on females” and discount them.
Further, do not get into impression that all Hindu boys are kind and loving. There are all kinds of people in all faiths. You have to evaluate an individual person you are dealing with.
Your parents wish for “but they want to marry me in the muslim community only.” We hope later you will not bring up Shahadah (conversion) request before your Nikaah with your Hindu boy friend.
We assume you have thought through all above and found your Hindu boyfriend the perfect person for you. We are happy for you. Further, we are happy to know that you have decided “without changing any one of us our religion.” This is a noble thought and that is the way it should be.
You need to know who you are. What Islam means to you? How about the Koran on Hindus? Do you believe there is only one God in (the direction of) Saudi Arabia? Who are Rama and Goddesh Laxmi? Do you believe in THIS life or the AFTER life? Do you believe in the Judgment Day? What will you tell Allah on the Judgment Day for associating with idol-worshippers? What will you teach your Hindu-Muslim children about the Geeta and Koran?
We recommend you read Muslim-Girl and ask your boyfriend to read the Hindu-Boy article and cross references there in. This will help you understand some of complexities and reality of life that you may not have realized. Get back to us with more specific questions.
You seem to be intelligent and certainly educated. Religious books may say one thing but you are smart to judge what are right things to do in life. Yes, you will come across all kind of hurdles, but if you are fully “informed” and financially independent, you can get over all issues.
Please keep us posted for the development in your relationship. We wish you the best. -Admin.
Khurshida says: Oct 24, 22012 at 4:49 am
Thanks Admn. for your comments above.
I have already made indepth study of my relations with my Hindu BF including future course of action in close discussion with him.
Hopefully, we shall be marrying after 6 months from now, including buying a good house. I have indicated my desire to my parents. They feel little hesistantm but I am sure they will accept our relations, when they meet my BF and his family. -Khurshida.
We have many good consultants on this web site and they will get back to you with their views.
Be a friend on Facebook. Return to InterfaithShaadi.org. To share your experience, read.
Khurshida,
Wish you both all the best for your forthcoming marriage and hope it may show the light to other Muslim women scrambling for their emancipation and a happy married life.
Hi so called An Indian? but a real Talibani face?
Dont poke your nose in muslim girls’ personal matters. You are no body to interfere. Let us live blissful life.
Here is an update now. We both have decided to marry in Jan.2013, by that time all modelaties shall be worked out.
This video I would like to share with u miss Khurshida and all those eho are interested in marrying hindu boys. It is catered mainly to girls willing to marry hindu boys. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIzKgBxzg-I
congrats khurshida ji ! . . I hope ab tak aapki shadi ho chuki hogi. . . . Uparwala ek h . . Ye to jameeni gadho ne usko alag kaha h. . Hamare itne gods ka matlab ye h ki chahe jo b kisi ka b bhagwan, allah ya kuch aur b ho . Sab ek h. . .wo mahan h . Use na koi jan paya na dekh saka god nirakar ,nirvikar h . . . Bhagwan aap dono ko khushiya de
To All the people who visit this website, consider that
ALL THE STORIES AND POSTS ON THIS SITE ARE FAKE
Thanks Admn. for your comments above.
I have already made indepth study of my relations with my Hindu BF including future course of action in close discussion with him.
Hopefully, we shall be marrying after 6 months from now, including buying a good house. I have indicated my desire to my parents. They feel little hesistantm but I am sure they will accept our relations, when they meet my BF and his family.
Do not rush into a decision, best wishes.
Ask your bf to read all these the first hand, not filtered messages conveyed from you. Both should make fully informed decision for long lasting successful marriage.
Meantime, come here and guide others. Best way to gain is to guide others, best way to learn is to teach!
Yes, we fully agree that homes and nations where women are respected will prosper. Rest will get the “Hell Fire” in THIS life.
Admin i have no words for you, but i am flattered on your thoughts,
really you are human being not like others are muslim and hindu or christian, just a human being.
i like this way admin, thanks for your blog.
i born a hindu but forcefully converted into a hindu, but i don’t believe in any religion all man made and fake things just to dividing ppl .
Atul,
You have to separate RELIGION from DHARMA.
This will be confusing but fact….
Hindus don’t have to be religious
Any Christian or Muslim cannot be not-religious otherwise he/she is not a Christian or Muslim
Muslims, Jews and Christians could be Dharmic
The “religion” is a creation of Abrahamics, does not apply to dharmic faiths like Hinduism, Jainism, Buddhism and Sikhism
The “religion” concept has a very limited scope and apply to only a limited people in this World, while the dharma apply to human, animals, trees, cloud, sun, etc.
Let us explain you what we mean. This world is sustained because most people and “things” are following their Dharma. An electron’s dharma is to move in an atomic orbit. The day that electron decides to go off that orbit, it becomes an a-dharmic to create chaos. If more people and things go a-dharmic, this world will come to an end.
Mother Teresa was Christian by religion, but had a Dharma of helping needy. The same way, Gandhiji was Hindu by religion but was dharmic. On the other hands, Osama Bin Laden was a religious Muslim but was an a-dharmic.
So Atul, you are a dharmic and you don’t have to be a religious!!
The problem is as soon as the Christians and Muslims hear that you are not a Hindu, they will rush to salvage you by their “religious” labels BBS. They think as soon as one has the BBS label, that 5 minute ritual will guarantee you a ticket to the heaven. What a stupid thought!
Read and follow Rajiv Malhotra.
Any interfaith dating guy/girl who claims to be a “true religious” should not get into an interfaith relationship, unless you are a love-proselytizer.
If any an interfaith dating person asks “how do I know if my intended spouse is intolerant?”, simply say NO BBS and you will have your answer.
HI Every one,
Just used common sense to move away from religion. I was born in a Muslim family, hence I was a Muslim till I became an adult. Had I been born under any other religion, I would’ve been a follower of the same. And all my life I heard that Muslims would have the first right to heaven. That sounded very absurd to me and as my brain opened up i realized it was not my achievement of being born in a Muslim family that I had a birth right to heaven. Surely God cannot be so unfair. Furthermore, the history of Islam is full of bloodshed and war, and the Quran clearly allows jihad on one side and then says all humans are equal. Surely God could not reveal such hypocritical statements and I openly challenge the validity of the book. I am a God fearing human who believes every human is equal, be he/she from any religion, caste or creed. I freely choose not to follow Islam anymore as the concept is against my altruistic views on life, where a persons life and faith should be governed by his/her own free mind and logical reasoning. Not by the way of birth or what the ancestors have always believed in.
Arsalan Chatha, 24, Pakistan, now an agnostic
I left Islam. I always thought that Muhammad can not be God’s messenger or a holy man! By looking at his personal affairs, especially with women, I can not follow a man who marries each woman he meets! Also the contradictions in the Quran and the way it was written – in a way that is so difficult to understand, made me believe that this is a man made religion . Also, Islam has NO tolerance for other belief systems, and the argument that Muslims are very lucky that they were born in Muslim countries got me convinced that Muslims are so closed-minded and forgot that there are many wonderful people on this planet who are not Muslims. I think Islam is the worst thing that happened to humanity. It pushes Muslim’s backwards and that is why there is no single Muslim country is advanced or even civilized! Also on the question of prayer, they say if you do not pray 5 times a day you will be burned in hell for ever! I tried prayer of course when I was a Muslim, but I did not feel anything, I felt I am just exercising or in the Gym, I felt I am like a robot. No feeling at all. This is pure brainwashing. Now I am not sure if there is God or Not, the theory of evolution blew my mind and the fact that there are so many religions in the world and so many problems in the world made me believe that Man created God not the other way around.
Hussein, Egypt, now an agnostic
9/11 probably opened my eyes. I realized that Islam at its best couldn’t re-invent itself or adapt to the changing world. I realized also, its the reason for all failures of Arabs and Muslims. Yet Islam is apologetic to every medieval notion, the way it treats women, other non-believers and religions, solving simple problems of life other than Halal/Haraam and just branding others as blasphemous. This religion goes against my mind and values, that is why I left it.
Ahmed BenKerishan, United Arab Emirates,,
Marry a soulmate for a life time, not a contractor temporarily. Start educating your parents and other family members. You can site the example of Muhammad himself as a bride. Would your parents like to have a son-in-law like Muhammad who is aged, polygamous and marrying daughter-in-law ? I don’t mean to hurt anybody, just putting the hard facts. Faith shouldn’t make you blind, but it must be guarded by reason. Be polite and courteous to your parents and ever obedient while educating them and take the support of your other family members, relatives and family friends who are more amenable to you. May Allah show you the right path but beware of his so called Muhammad followers.