Aleshia says: Submitted on 2012/12/13 at 1:55 pm
Hello, Im a muslim woman married to a very religious Sikh man also. But I am still Muslim as God wants me to be. I know that you have had many hateful and sinful and hypocritical things said about you for marrying sikh man.. (I have also), but you have to know that those people, for saying that, are themselves hypocrites, and people will try to hurt your life. But know that you are a good person, and that those people are not true to Islam as you thought they were. I choose to be Muslim, and our children are Muslim as well.
Why exactly did you leave Islam? Sikh and Muslims go perfectly with one another. And I wont try to make you come back to Islam, but you seem to have so much passion for hating Islam, do you have this much passion for the sikh religion and hinduism? I have respect for all religion as I have come in contact and supported the buddhism and hindu religion before I came to Islam, but I still choose to have the “gods” in my home, as I know that nothing is more important to me than Allaah tala. But you hate Islam so much? The sikhs respect all religions. Ive even been ‘shunned ‘ by the whole masjid who I know 6 of them spread lies about me and my husband, and even tried calling police for us.. lol.. crazy bunch of people who are really insecure… but im still curious why u left? u can email me if ud like: joganpreet84@gmail.com -Aleshia.
Aleshia says: December 13, 2012 at 2:12 pm
@srinivas hello, i think it is a good idea for them to marry… we be so wrapped up in muslim, sikh, hindu…. ALLAAH SWT IS ALLAAH SWT, GOD IS ONE EK ONKAR if they are in love marry… NOTHING is stopping them but their own fears… realize this… i married sikh man, and my life as a muslim transformed into a beautiful wonderful life. he participates in all muslim holidays and events, and I participate in his. god is one, and dont get so wrapped up in dividing our God…
Srinivas says: December 14, 2012 at 12:12 am
In other comment you wrote: “I choose to be Muslim, and our children are Muslim as well.”
So, it does not matter whether he participating in your festivals or you participating in his festival. After all, your children turned to be Muslims.
Celebrating festivals (blah blah..) does mean anything to me I rather say that where is the need for celebrating this blah blah. This is all sugar coating.
You are a stealth Jihadi. -Srinivas.
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Admin says:
We agree to Srinivas, “You are a stealth Jihadi”.
Why you cannot tolerate Sikh children? Why the Sikh heritage has to end? Why Islam is only one to survive as your heritage? Is Islam only a true religion? Is the message of Muhammad better than that of Guru Nanak? Is Islam superior over Sikhism? Are you going to encourage your children and great grandchildren to marry to other Sikhs …and demand for only Islam as heritage? How long this saga will continue …till no more Sikh left to convert?
You said, “i married sikh man, and my life as a muslim transformed into a beautiful wonderful life”. So is it the reward (extinction) Sikh community get to be nice to others? Aleshia, you are nothing but an opportunist, selfish and a love-proselytizer.
Any marriage where children are taught exclusively from only one faith is not an IM-WE (interfaith marriage with equality). All interfaith dating couple must ask this most important question, “do our children have to have the BBS label”? -Admin.
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Also read: Islamic Women Today, Hindu girl, Muslim girl, Hindu boy, Muslim boy,
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Muslim: a big difference in behaviour of Hindu guys
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Admin is correct
you found your husband attractive. married him. You are ashamed your children be with long hair semitrimmed or not hairs.
Mr.Turki Salim you suggest to Yasmeen to “Dear Alishia, it seems that you didn’t read anything in the Quran or Sunna, or ask An Imam or even looked online to see if what you gonna do is correct or not.
As a Muslim Man, I Always prefer A muslim woman even if the Kafer Woman is beautiful or rich or anything, like Allah Taala said?:”A muslim woman is better than kafer woman , even if you like her”.
Alishia, Please don’t explain Islam to other in your way, because you are in the wrong way.
God bless you sister, and get you back to islam and forgive you for your sin”
About which she told that is not sin na! in your opinion it’ll be right first you should know about your religion she is presenting your eye opener facts that what are your people doing behind the name of kuran and islam. One side you say that the islam is the religion of peace and Marcy and when the things are become real then you left the forgiveness and Marcy far away. i mean she is also muslim girl and she wants to live her life happily with some one then why you people stands to stop them. Is there is any fact about when a muslim girl who got married with a non muslim guy and after her death he come back from where ever she reached (heaven or hell) and told any one that because of my marriage i am in hell or because of that work i am in heaven. It is just our mentality about the religion. Even do you know about muhhamad that he got heaven or hell in any single verse of kuran.
what is a luswom muslim girl? any one explan pkz? is it a lust to have sex with non muslim boys?
yes fatima u r rite but why u r asking u think its wrong
admin , sikh+islam, 50%-50% teachings will evuntually lead to islam, sikhism is like subset of islam, if you study sikhism, then you will not find any fundamental teaching which will turn away any person from islam, its only hinduism which created problem with islam
That is something all Sikhs in love with a Muslim should know. Ultimately it will be Muhammad all over, and Guru Nanakji will be a history.
why guru nanakji will be history, mark your words, can you back up your claim that guru nank ji will be history if 50-50 teachings from both islam and sikhism are tought to children
Can the Sikh not utter the Shahadah? Can a Sikh-Muslim children have Sikh names, visit gurudwara every time they also visit a Mosque or perform namaz, not have religious circumcision, utter Gurunanakji’s name the same time Muhammad’s, in home have big photos of Kaaba and also Gurunanakji, Children will always say we are Sikh-Muslim (nothing more or less)?
its depend on chiildren what they want to whether they want to call them sokh, sikh-muslim or whatever, whats your problem with circumcsion you want them to follow sikh ritulas which i have no problem then why u have problem tfollowing islamic ritulas like circumcsion, where is your equality, you are really a joker
u go to hell . we will not change our. religion to marry Muslim girl
Unfortunately your boyfriend considered a Kaafir, and therefore marriage will not be recognized by your parents, and your community etc, and most likely your family will disown you.
Sikh Muslim marriages never work, i know Muslim men and on the rare occasion women whom married Sikh people in the hope of proving people wrong, but it always goes wrong, and ends up in divorce. Often i wonder, whether such relationships were in fact inspired by watching too many Bollywood movies. Stop watching lot’s of fantasy and get back to reality, if you really truly know him, and e truly loved you, he would have changed everything in his life to accommodate you, even change his religion, and study Islam to it’s entirety for a good 3-4 years before marrying you, but it seem that this guy really took you for a ride, even though he doesn’t know it him self.
People use the word boyfriend so casually, not realizing that the word means that you are on the road to get married with each other. Just because a man respects you, treats you well, or says things that you agree with, or like, doesn’t mean he’s made up of the right material, this form of agreeance is described as Mutual Understanding, nothing more, it allows for peace around the world, between people of different faiths, race, sexes etc allows us to be empathetic with one another and be friends with each other, but does not constitute boyfriend material, for that you must put into consideration, family, children, life ambition, religion etc often friends can steer you in the wrong direction as they belong to your peer group, and have very little understanding about the institution of marriage, and what constitutes a relationship, if i was you leave him, and follow your true hunch, that Muslim guy that was shy, but his friends have told you that he likes you, that’s the guy that you should go for, however if your relationship with the Sikh guy was a physical relationship, you might have already tainted that avenue, repent, and find a Muslim guy whom had similar experiences with Sikh women (most likely to be a bad apple though). In your heart of hearts you really know deep down who the right guy for you really was, you’ve just chosen the easy route, and it’s taken you here.
Keep away from friends when you looking for reassurances, they truly know nothing about relationships, it’s only married people, who’ve been with each other for a long time (at least 15 years) that can better advise you, erm for instance .. your parents, aunties, uncles, etc. if you think that your parents marriage is boring, watch what your’s is going to turn out to be with the sikh person, once all the lovey-dovey phase is over.
If your age is 16 – 24, go back to school, get your education, find a successful job, and we’ll all be running towards you, it’s not the other way around, any mature person will tell you this.
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=7996
u go to hell . we will not change our. religion to marry Muslim girl
were is the poof were are here children or were is the grave stone?
I think it’s disgusting how people want to degrade each others religions
All these stories about prophet Mohammed pbuh
People spreading hatred
I was searching online for something that will help me but after reading all this hatred on different websites I really dnt care anymore
I’m a Muslim woman inlove with a Sikh man and although I feared what would happen and worried how are we going to be together I have now come to the conclusion that I dnt care what the world says the quran says a Muslim may marry whomever he or she wants to marry providing they are Muslim
I cudnt ask my love to embrace Islam because I dnt want him to do it for me if he learns about my religion it will help him understand if during this learning he decides to be a muslim then I will thank Allah for giving me this blessing. In turn I am willing to learn and understand his religion too
If we can’t get married and it isn’t in our kismet then we won’t marry n may Allah give us the strength to live our lives righteously with each other still a part of our lives, we will Neva marry any one else
I just pray ppl stop spreading all this hate m show respect to each other and their religion
Reply at:https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=5930
Dear Muslim,
We feel you are on track. If you keep this attitude, “I dnt care what the world says the quran says a Muslim may marry whomever he or she wants to marry providing they are Muslim
I cudnt ask my love to embrace Islam”, you will be just fine. Best wishes.
@all Muslims against love
muslim girl can marry any religion guy, hindu, muslim sikh, she wont go to hell for that whoever says she will go to hell is racist and spreading hatred, and disturbing communal harmony. Muslim girls can marry any religion guy, as long as they love each other. You on the other hand will be in hell for trying to break heart, by mischief.
hritik married Muslim girl Suzanne khan, so that means they will go to hell ? No intact lives in paradise and will be with him till 7 birth. Amir khan sister married Hindu, so she will go to hell? No , some Muslims spreading wrong information.
This is a good excuse to convert an innocent Hindu lover to Islam, that’s all.
If a Muslim (or a Hindu) believes he/she cannot marry out side their faith, then they should not bother getting in love to start. It is wrong to be in lover for several years and after that ask the intended spouse to convert.
I totally dis agree that a practicing Muslim man can marry Sikh ,Hindu or any Kafir women.If they want to marry such woman they should first convert them to Islam ,give them a Islamic Name and teach them Islamic morals and conduct,I twin brother was in love with a Sikh girl for many years ,my parents were deadly against this marriage because we are SUNNI and all our family member are practicing Muslim ,my twin (name Withheld)agreed to make her Muslim and then he will marry her ,so my bhabi accepted Islam in the Mosque in front of hundreds of people, her parents and immediate family members were also present she read Kalima Taiyaba and name was change from H……. Kaur to (Muslim Name) now they are so happy with 2 boys(Muslim name for kids) and the third is on his way. I would say they are very happy. kids
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=8076
nice comments ….
All stories fake under muslim names and Those who marry non muslims did not remain muslims and will go to hell forever life after death tell them you are not muslims. To learn about islam vist http://www.usislam.org for more ioformation about islam.do not belive these posts as they lie about islam.learn truth about islam from website.
Wrong they will not. You are racist and spreading hatred, and disturbing communal harmony. Muslim girls can marry any religion guy, as long as they love each other. You on the other hand will be in hell for trying to break heart, by mischief.
hritik married Muslim girl Suzanne khan, so that means they will go to hell ? No my friend you are so wrong !
Aleshia,
God has given you the once in lifetime opportunity to throw the yoke of Muhammad and just worship Allah. Don’t you know about Muhammad that he married a grand daughter like 6 year old girl Aisha when he was 54 years of age. In his last 12 years of life i.e. from 50 to 62 years of hs age, he married at least 10 girls! Moreover, he celebrated the wedding night with the sobbing widows aggrieved at the deaths of their nears and dears including husbands/fathers/brothers! Not only he but also his companions did the same with the group of aggrived women plundered in the battles. They were showcased as the trophy.
Why doesn’t women lead the prayers in the mosque? Why is there no woman among the galaxy of prophets. Do you think merciful Allah will fill up the hell fire mostly by the women and the all male perpetrators in the heaven? Muhammad has committed the grievous sin by making impartial Allah a partisan against the women folk. Very cleverly he added his name in Shahada which should have been for Allah only. So, he considers him as important as Allah!
The root cause of Muslim women’s misery is non but Muhammad’s ideology which is still creating havoc against the Muslim women in addition to the non Muslims.
What will you say to your children when they will ask you the above questions? What will you answer to them if they blame you for raising them on the footprints of Muhammad, even in the full knowledge of Muhammad’s acts? Would like your husband to become Muhammad in the evening of his life by bringing four young girls of your children age after showing you the door. Just think on the above mentioned points. Now the time has come to discard Muhammad and take recourses of omnipotent and all compassionate Allah (not a cruel Allah as depicted by Muhammad).
Allah may bestow his blessings on you.
were are her children and last and not least were is her gravestone?
Dear Yasmeen,
You have done a wonderful job to pinpoint islamic evils against female community. Hope this article will enlighten women folk and help them to awake and fight against such evil practices.
Also read: Islamic Women Today
Admin,
Can you make the blog ‘Islamic Women Today’ accissible from all the blogs? It may help all the Muslim women to refer what other Muslim women’s opinion regarding the Muslim way of living?
Dear Aleshia,
You are lucky that you could get married to a sikh family and enjoying a lot. Had you been married, if unfortunately, you would have been victim of various barbaric behaviours and tortures of islamic religion.
There seems to be no one in the world of Islam that is willing to speak out and bring an end to these practices. Imams are silent, the women’s movements of the world are silent, particularly women’s studies in the universities, and reform seems impossible given the secondary position of women in the Qur’an and the hadiths.
There are many practices that demean women and subject them to barbaric and evil conditions.
1. Female Genital Mutilations
Consider the following news story:
TUZ KHURMATU, Iraq – Sheelan Anwar Omer, a shy 7-year-old Kurdish girl, bounded into her neighbor’s house with an ear-to-ear smile, looking for the party her mother had promised.
There was no celebration. Instead, a local woman quickly locked a rusty red door behind Sheelan, who looked bewildered when her mother ordered the girl to remove her underpants. Sheelan began to whimper, then tremble, while the women pushed apart her legs and a midwife raised a stainless-steel razor blade in the air. “I do this in the name of Allah!” she intoned.
As the midwife sliced off part of Sheelan’s genitals, the girl let out a high-pitched wail heard throughout the neighborhood. As she carried the sobbing child back home, Sheelan’s mother smiled with pride.
“This is the practice of the Kurdish people for as long as anyone can remember,” said the mother, Aisha Hameed, 30, a housewife in this ethnically mixed town about 100 miles north of Baghdad. “We don’t know why we do it, but we will never stop because Islam and our elders require it.”
More than 60 percent of women in Kurdish areas of northern Iraq have been circumcised, according to a study conducted this year. In at least one Kurdish territory, 95 percent of women have undergone the practice, which human rights groups call female genital mutilation.
“In Somalia, like many countries across Africa and the Middle East, little girls are made “pure” by having their genitals cut out. There is no other way to describe this procedure, which typically occurs around the age of five. After the child’s clitoris and labia are carved out, scraped off, or, in more compassionate areas, merely cut or pricked, the whole area is often sewn up, so that a thick band of tissue forms a chastity belt made of the girl’s own scarred flesh. A small hole is carefully situated to permit a thin flow of pee. Only great force can tear the scar tissue wider, for sex.
“Female genital mutilation predates Islam. Not all Muslims do this, and a few of the peoples who do are not Islamic. But in Somalia, where virtually every girl is excised, the practice is always justified in the name of Islam. Uncircumcised girls may be possessed by devils, fall into vice and perdition, and becomes whores. Imams never discourage the practice: it keeps girls pure.
“Many girls die during or after their excision, from infections, Other complications cause enormous, more or less lifelong pain.”
There are testimonies of Muslim girls who are frightened to death of their wedding night when they are forced to have sex under these conditions. Not only is sex a problem, but delivering a child through these conditions is abnormal. One would think that Muslim men would rise up and condemn the practice for there are men who married women and could not enter the woman on their wedding night. This reflects poorly on a man’s image of himself.
I consulted a friend who is an ob-gyn doctor and asked his views on the implication of this mutilation. He wrote:
“I looked up Frank Netter’s drawings of the procedure (Netter is a well honored MD/medical artist who is famous for his drawings of anatomical and surgical subjects). Netter shows various degrees of mutilation involved with female “circumcision”. It may involve “only” a partial removal of the anterior labia minora and clitoral hood, to the total removal of the labia minora, partial removal of the labia majora and extirpation of the total clitoris. This is the same as we do for cancer of the vulva (called a simple vulvectomy). In both cases with “circumcision”, the labia are the sutured TOGETHER! (with vulvectomy we attempt to resuture residual anatomy to appropriate residual anatomy). The net results leaves a nearly impenetrable vulva…or what I would think an actually impenetrable vulva. The following are some possible/probable side effects:
1) Physical obstruction of the introitus may lead to a condition of hematocolpos and hematometria…the accumulation of menstrual blood in the vagina and endometrial cavity of the uterus which would cause(likely) sterility as well as endometriosis (a condition of small implants of endometrium in the lower abdominal cavity that causes pockets of blood in the abdomen and severe pain in the abdomen…and even potential death should the enlarging blood cysts rupture)
2) A misdirection of the urinary stream–the labia minora fundamentally direct or point the flow of urine. This side effect is worse than it sounds…it may cause the smell of urine on the person so effected.
3) Severe scarring of the vulva which would lead to a predisposition to severe tearing during childbirth. This (tearing) could lead to severe hemorrhage and the formation of huge hematomas of the vulva…I’ve seen them the size of a football and require several units of blood transfusion. As a corollary of this, scarring could cause dystocia (an increased disability, or even inability, to deliver.)
4) Infection at the time of the procedure or shortly thereafter…infection with attempted intercourse or any trauma that might lacerate the scar tissue.
5) Massive dyspareunia (pain with intercourse) due to the scar tissue. This would probably be a lifetime problem unless obviated by surgery. Normal sexual function would likely be impossible.
6) The psychological effects would be massive. It seems to certainly have the grotesque psychological side effects as childhood rape has, which often leads to a number of problems, such as drug and alcohol addiction (high correlation), antisocial behavioral disorders (moderate correlation) and remarkably promiscuous behavior, including prostitution (high correlation)
7) It has been my observation that many women who are self-described lesbians have had traumatic incidents analogous to this that are associated, in the victim’s opinion, with men.”
One has to ask about this practice in the minds of people. Did the Creator make a mistake in making females the way they are? Do Muslims feel the need to improve on what He did? Is this not an insult to the Creator? What does this do for the female in terms of sexual pleasure? It is not commanded in the Qur’an, so why not reject the practice? Why do imams not condemn the practice?
The story of Genesis 1-2 is that God created man and woman. No improvements were necessary. No barbaric operations were ordered. In fact the Hebrews were forbidden to cut the body. “You are the sons of the LORD your God. You shall not cut yourselves or make any baldness on your foreheads for the dead. (Dt. 14:1) In the New Testament we read: “And the God of peace himself sanctify you wholly; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved entire, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. “ (I Thess. 5:23 ASV) The body, both male and female, is to be kept in its created state.
The lone exception is male circumcision which was the sign of Yahweh’s Covenant with Abraham. As such the foreskin was cut, but the organ was not mutilated. Nor does it impose a hardship on the man. This was commanded for the Jewish people only. The Qur’an does not command female cutting. If one attempted to justify the practice from the hadiths it must be remembered they are not “revelation.” Moreover, there are so many fraudulent hadiths that one cannot be sure about using them to justify an evil practice on women.
It is a horrible sin to mutilate little girls in the name of custom, Allah, religion, or tradition.
2. Wearing the burqa.
This is the most extreme form of covering for females. One of the most barbaric examples of this was in March 2002 in Mecca when fifteen girls were killed in a fire at their school. The Saudi Religious police would not allow the girls out of the building without the proper dress. They battled the police and the firemen who were trying to open the schools’s doors. Is this not an evil practice that required the girls to die rather than being seen without the burqa? What kind of value system is this?
Can you imagine as a man wearing a tent to cover your whole body and not exposing any part of your body to be viewed by others? Not only is it demeaning to women, it is also unhealthy.
“Muslim women who wear the burqa in Ireland are at increased risk of pelvic fractures during childbirth because of vitamin D deficiency due to a lack of sunlight, a consultant warns.
Babies born to women with vitamin D deficiency are also more prone to seizures in their first week of life, according to Dr Miriam Casey, of the Osteoporosis Unit in St James’s hospital in Dublin.
Casey said she was aware of cases involving pelvic fractures, and warned that these could become more frequent as Ireland’s Muslim population increased. “Ireland’s temperate climate doesn’t have the intense sunlight that keeps burqa-clad women from becoming vitamin D-deficient in their own countries,” she said.
Vitamin D helps the body to absorb calcium and is crucial for making bones strong. The greatest source is sunlight.
Casey said the fractures occur at sites of particular weakness which develop in under-mineralised pelvic bones. In these women’s babies, low calcium can cause “serious complications such as seizures, growth retardation, muscle weakness and fractures”.
“As a toddler, carrying the weight of the torso can force the development of a bow-legged appearance and a waddling gait,” she said. “Later, there can be rickets, which is caused by vitamin D deficiency, with swollen wrists and bones that fail to fuse in adolescence.”
Darker skins can produce as little as 1% of the vitamin D that fair skins produce. Moreover, studies have found that the rate of many diseases rises the further north one moves, leading researchers to suspect that vitamin D may play a greater role in health than previously thought. (“Ireland too grey for the burqa,” by Colin Gleeson for the Times Online, December 28, 2008)
It seems that the Creator made us to be exposed to the sun for our health’s sake, but many Muslim cultures require a female to be covered and that is more important to Islam than health. It is irrational to think that only men will be excited by viewing women. Why do not the men cover themselves as required of the women? Women are not without passion. How would a man feel wearing a black tent that covers his entire body and his face covered so no one would recognize him? For more on this, go here and here.
3. Honor killings
No one knows the number of “honor killings” that occur each year. The estimates run into the thousands. Frequently the police do not investigate and bring charges against the murderer in Muslim cultures. Honor killings are primarily related to the females who may be suspected of having sex before marriage, flirting with someone, talking to a stranger, failing to serve a meal on time, rape by a relative, cousin, uncle, or brother. There is no limit to the reasons given for honor killings. One of the more notorious honor killings occurred in the Dallas, Texas area where two sisters were killed by their father because they were being too influenced by western culture and music. In many places records are not kept on these murders and that is one of the reasons statistics are not well documented. (*)
Ayaan Hirsi Ali pressed for an experiment in Holland where figures were not kept. In a time period between Oct. 2004 and May 2005 eleven Muslim girls were killed by their families in just two regions of the country. There are 25 such regions in Holland.
Shawbo Ali Rauf was a 19 year old Iraqi girl who was murdered by her own in-laws. Her crime was to have an unknown number on her mobile phone. Her “honour killing” is just one in a grotesque series emerging from Iraq, where activists speak of a “genocide” against women in the name of religion. (*)
In the latest such case, it was reported yesterday that a 17-year-old girl, Rand Abdel-Qader, was stabbed to death last month by her father for becoming infatuated with a British soldier serving in southern Iraq. In Basra alone, police acknowledge that 15 women a month are murdered for breaching Islamic dress codes. Campaigners insist it is a conservative figure. Violence against women is rampant, rising every day with the power of the militias. Beheadings, rapes, beatings, suicides through self-immolation, genital mutilation, trafficking and child abuse masquerading as marriage of girls as young as nine are all on the increase. (*)
A sixteen-year-old Palestinian girl became pregnant after being raped by her younger brother. Once her condition became known, her family encouraged her older brother to kill her to remove the blemish from their honor. Her brothers, the rapist and the murderer, were exonerated. The girl was blamed. “She made a mistake,” said one of her male cousins. “She had to pay for it.
Even more horrifically, a four-year-old Palestinian girl, raped by a man in his mid-twenties, was left by her family to bleed to death. They did this because they felt her misfortune would sully their honor.
“European police report that Islamic honor killings are on the rise. In 2005, for instance, a review by British police of 22 domestic homicides led to 18 of the cases being reclassified as “murder in the name of so-called ‘honor.’” Polls routinely find that a disturbingly large percentage of Muslims – one in 10 according to a 2006 BBC poll – would condone the murder of someone seen to have disrespected their families honor.” (Frontpagemag, Jan.1, 2009)
The claim is that the female has brought shame to the family. The greater shame is that they have no shame for what they do to the women.
As long as the “shame culture” exists there will be lots of innocent victims put to death. Medical examinations have revealed that innocent girls accused of immorality were still virgins, and the real evil was in the minds of the fathers, or brothers, or relatives. The principle of “innocent until proven guilty” doesn’t seem to operate in the minds of these people.
4. Wife beating
The practice of beating a wife is not new in many societies. It may come about because of jealousy, laziness, indifference, or distrust. There are lots of irrational excuses for this in many cultures. Even among Christians there are those who beat their wives.
There are no religious verses commanding a Christian to beat his wife. Most non-Muslims who beat their wives do not have any religious justification for it. There are Muslim men who do not beat their wives, however, the Muslim context is different. There is a religious directive for it. The Qur’an says, “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because God has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband’s) absence what God would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For God is Most High, great (above you all).” (Surah 4:34 Yusuf Ali’s trans.)
Pickthall uses the word “scourge them.” Six other translations of the Qur’an use the word “beat them.”
Obviously this is a command that gets a lot of attention both in and out of Islam. Inside are the defenders saying that it is such a mild beating as with a “toothbrush.” Those outside of Islam have seen the results of the beating of neighbors who have been bruised, battered, thrown against the walls of their apartments. Often nothing happens when the police arrive because the wives will not file charges. So it goes on and on.
Statistics are hard to come by for obvious reasons. “The Pakistan Institute of Medical Sciences has determined that over ninety percent of Pakistani wives have been struck, beaten, or abused sexually — for offenses on the order of cooking an unsatisfactory meal. Others were punished for failing to give birth to a male child. In Spring 2005, when the East African nation of Chad tried to institute a new family law that would outlaw wife beating, Muslim clerics led resistance to the measure as un-Islamic.”
Muslim leaders do affirm the view of the Qur’an and teach the idea of beating a disobedient wife.
On October 5, 2004, France expelled Algerian-born Imam Abdel Qader Bouziane for telling a French magazine that Muslim husbands may beat their wives. This follows the sentencing on January 14 of the Egyptian-born Sheik Muhammad Kamal Mustafa, the imam of the mosque of the Spanish city of Fuengirola, Costa del Sol, for publishing a book that explains that wife-beating is in accordance with Shariah law.
Sheik Yousuf Qaradhawi, one of the most influential clerics in Sunni Islam and head of the European Council for Fatwa and Research and the International Council of Muslim Clerics, has also advocated wife-beating on multiple occasions in his 1984 book “The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam,” and on his weekly Al Jazeera program, which is popular among the surging number of European Muslims who increasingly look to religious leaders from the Middle East for religious guidance. This is particularly true with the growth of viewers watching Arab TV stations, available on satellite TV in Europe, which frequently airs shows dedicated to teaching a husband how to beat his wife. The following examples on this subject can be viewed at http://www.memritv.org (MEMRI | Friday, November 05, 2004)
For an extensive treatment on the issue of wife beating go here.
There are probably many explanations why men do beat their wives. One may be that many marriages are arranged and neither person knows the other. If the marriage has a large age gap as in a 10 year old girl and a 40 year old man the marriage is doomed to have lots of problems. A recent story from Saudi Arabic tells of a girl who was 5 who appeared to be tested for marriage. The doctor denied the test and she could not get married. What companionship is there between two such spans of ages? What is the basis of love in an arranged marriage?
The lack of education for females is also a source of problems. The Taliban has been burning down schools, threatening people who send their girls to schools, and the end result is an enforced ignorance of the females. Can there be any preparation for marriage in ignorance?
There will be no change in this situation since the word from Allah and Mohammed is to beat the disobedient wives.
5. Rape
In a number of western countries, Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Australia, there have been a large increase in the rape of non-Muslim women some as young as a 13 year old Swedish girl gang raped by 5 Kurds. The victims in Australia were called “sluts” or “Aussie pigs.” A Lebanese Sheik Faiz Mohammed blamed the women themselves for wearing skimpy clothing which invites men to rape them. In Copenhagen, Islamic mufti Shahid Mehdi declared that women who did not wear a head scarf were asking to be raped.
What is the psychology behind all these rapes? (Someone has written that most of the men who rape had the name of Mohammed.) The answer lies in the example of Mohammed. Rape was permitted and encouraged by Mohammed. Rape is a part of jihad. It is a part of war. The women captured in battle were raped and the husbands humiliated.
Mohammed participated in this horror. After the battle of Khaybar the spoils were given out. One warrior, Dihya bin Khalifa requested of Mohammed that he be given a slave girl from the captives. He chose a woman name Safiyya bint Huyayy. Her husband had been captured, tortured and killed by the Muslims. Later when Mohammed saw her he told Dihya to take another girl from the captives. Mohammed freed her and married her upon her agreement to convert to Islam. That night she was dressed in a wedding dress and Mohammed consummated the marriage. What was it like to see your husband tortured, killed, and then forced into a marriage on the same day?
One of the problems discussing rape is that Muslims do not consider raping a non-Muslim as a sin or a problem. It is justified because Mohammed did it.
Rape is not only bad in the western countries where there can be punishment for the offenders when caught and tried, but in Muslim countries there is a different problem. If a woman makes charges at the police station that she has been raped, she must produce 4 male witnesses to justify her accusations. If she cannot produce these four witnesses, she is often charged with adultery or fornication and may be imprisoned herself. In Pakistan 75 percent or more of the women in prison are victims of rape. To report a rape may mean nothing more than a confession of guilt. Little is done to investigate the charges. Can you imagine the chagrin of a women who reports a rape at a police station to seek justice and to her dismay finds that she is put in jail for committing fornication or adultery?
For more information on the issue of rape in Islam, go here and here and here.
These are a few problems for women in the Muslim culture. Unfortunately, there will be little change for improvement of the lives of half a billion women. Conditions vary from country to country, some worse than others, but none with real freedom and position.
When women cannot be allowed a real education there will be problems borne of ignorance whether in growing up, marriage, raising a family, being a wife, being a real companion, or whatever. Ignorance is not bliss. Women can make a phenomenal contribution to the rising of culture if they are allowed this freedom. Only when one can escape the influence of a seventh century culture does this happen.
I request all sisters to analyse above evils of islam and propose solutions of of evils in the larger interest of female community.
Can you please give some comments on the above inhuman practices?
Dear Friend;
Upon Islam, The Muslim(Either man or woman)has no right to marry non Muslim person, only if he or she become muslim, otherwise , it will be called ZINA, means adultery.
And Aleshia made a mistake and she is doing a big sin(ZINA),she gave her self an exception by a self fatwa(Please Aleshia when you make sin, do not try to spread it among other clean women), because you get paid for it in the last journey with Allah.
Muhammed(PBUH), had a message not for fun, each marriage he made has sense, and all women he married with are muslim even the Coptic Maria became muslim before her marriage.
Dear Alishia, it seems that you didn’t read anything in the Quran or Sunna, or ask An Imam or even looked online to see if what you gonna do is correct or not.
As a Muslim Man, I Always prefer A muslim woman even if the Kafer Woman is beautiful or rich or anything, like Allah Taala said?:”A muslim woman is better than kafer woman , even if you like her”.
Alishia, Please don’t explain Islam to other in your way, because you are in the wrong way.
God bless you sister, and get you back to islam and forgive you for your sin.
iraq is not full muslim country u know do u research first
Dear Yasmeen,
The long detailed evil things you mentioned above are not part of ISLAM or a MUSLIM religious practice. So stop misleading people.
There are cultural and ignorant practices and crimes committed by people that are Muslims by name and these same acts are also committed by non Muslims in the same region such as Christians in the middle east or Hindus in India.
Please read and respond.
“Dear Yasmeen,
The long detailed evil things you mentioned above are not part of ISLAM or a MUSLIM religious practice. So stop misleading people.”
This is your comment Mr. Assem. i am also a muslim and i never ever understand that when we are talking about the islam and when the matter of marriage raised then why we stuck on the religion thing marriage with any one is just the matter of understanding to each other if they two do understand each other and they feel batter to each other and their relation is continuous from couple of years then why we have problem if they can move foreword together in their life then let do it them before start the relation ship they would have been also know that about their religion and they know very well that they comes from the different two religion so if they can run live together then they definitely do this. and what is the guaranty that they we do batter if they both are from the same religion. If we are talking about india particularly then there are 72% divorce cases running in courts are come from arrange marriages rather they are from the same religion. i mean to get a successful married life it should not necessary to be in the same religion. The two person who run their relationship from a long time rather awared about everything like religion, families, faiths and all that and even then they are comfortable with each other it is not because of religion it is because of understanding.
And some times as our religion forces to other people to being converted it shows us weakness of our’s and our religion. If our respected religion ISLAM is about of mercyness, about of forgiveness and about believe in one god then from where such kind of matters comes like religions and rituals.
Some cases are there where any child have problem with the thinking and mentality of her/his own parents infect they are live in the same way in same home and in same religion but even they disagree to each other than what’ll you say this thing, it is only the matter of thinking.
And as in above message as yasmeen said form holy book of kuran which fact is wrong. can you please which verse and which fact is wrong and why.
Aleshia,
As you said, you are a devout Muslim and at the same time you have supported Budhism and Hinduism. Can you clarify what it means? What way your version of Islam is different from that of the many others who maltreated you for your marriage with a Sikh?