Blind love? Turn back before it is too late

Someone says: December 11, 2014 at 1:46 am

Assalam alikom,

All my greetings to you Admin and Tanya and I really hope that I’m not too late and I would be thankful if I could get a reply back from both of you for confirmation. I would like to share my point of view and I hope it’s not too late.

I’m a Sunni Muslim boy and I was in a relationship with a very religious Mormon girl (Mormonism is a sect of Christianity that’s parallel to Ahmadiyya in Islam). So I find that our situation is a bit reversed since you love a guy from the major Christian sect while she loved a guy from the major Muslim sect. I’m sincerely going to tell you about my experience.

Both of us were religious and therefore we stayed good in term of avoiding premarital sex which was a hard obstacle for me. We were there for three long years and let me tell you, despite She was a nice girl and from a nice family by all means things were not going to work out between us. None of us wanted to convert to the other’s religion which was fine for me. Needless to say, we still had our own conflicts in term of how will we raise our children and how will we live.

There was a strong emotional connection but I swear that such thing wears off with time and then you will end up with the differences and conflicts you ignored. It wasn’t going to work at all. I’m glad it’s over now for over two years and I thank Allah it didn’t go ahead.

Trust me if you are both religious, things will never go well between the two of you. If you really believe in your religion, how can you justify yourself to marry a non-Ahmadi? Things might seem fine at first but once there is a kid or even before, problems might start, the only way for this thing to workout is if one of you doesn’t care completely.

I agree with the admin that you (Tanya) seem very submissive and this is the desperation and blindness of love. I hope you don’t get insulted or offended but please find your way through the mind because the heart is misguiding.

I lived such good joyful romantic moments but it only made it harder to finish it later. The sooner you realise, the less loss you will have. I know the admin here is a Hindu and opposes what I might say but you know for us and other Abrahamic faiths that marriage is a licence from God. If you believe that God doesn’t approve of it then it’s pointless. Accept this from me as a brother who went through the same road and turned back before it was too late. -Someone

Admin says:

Excellent message that all youths in BLIND love should read.

Only problem we have is why religious people get into love with someone from other faith to start with? Are you a love-proselytizer and hoping to convert that Mormon to Muslim?

Don’t tell us it was by chance, actually we believe in most cases it is by design. If a Muslim date a Muslim, immediately that discussion turned into marriage. While dating a girl from other faith, there is no risk. Have fun for a few years and if she doesn’t convert, simply walk away. It’s win-win situation for a love-proselytizer. -Admin

Someone says: December 11, 2014 at 2:02 pm

Thank you for getting back to me. Every Muslim would want his non-Muslim friend to convert to Islam since it’s the way to salvation and you wish for it to happen but this was a separate matter. If this Muslim doesn’t, basically he doesn’t care about the other person. Although I don’t push it through my friends throats.

I wasn’t using love to convert her since religion is in the heart and a relationship between a man and his deity. I actually had a different point of view from the assumption you made. In short, it was part of growing up. When you’re in love, you ignore differences and have higher hopes than reality, I didn’t mind her being a Mormon for a starter if she wanted to stay a Mormon for the rest of her life. We were good close friends for two years before the relationship and I liked many things about her during that time. It was her side that didn’t want to marry because she wanted a “Temple Marriage” which a non-Mormon can’t obtain. Although, her family appeared later that they were hoping we get married but they kept quiet about it since actually the girl pretended we were just good friends. Although it was obvious that it was more but I kept silence based on her desire. It just I saw her siblings getting married to non-Mormons after we were done.

At some earlier stage we realised it was pointless. Yet, she was still too much in love and wouldn’t let us end it basing on hope that she might change her mind. Once I realised it was impossible to continue, I couldn’t walk a way immediately since she was having some challenges in her life and I would have been a scoundrel if I just walked a way. I would have avoided the relationship if she were a Buddhist or a Hindu but as you know a Christian girl is allowed for the Muslim guy.

We are still friends until now but since then, I never went back that route again and I’m only for Muslims. It is actually harder to break a way from it than a Muslim-Muslim relationship and hard to know what the other person might want. Also it’s not necessarily that great for a Muslim-Muslim relationship. You know mate choice might face a lot of conflicts between families based on attitudes and personalities. Also this can happen between the two people in love. Also, You know Muslims have a big cultural variety across the Muslim World and needless to say that things might not go as easy as you stated in term of turning it into marriage. -SomeOne.

Also read: VIDEO: Interfaith Marriage with Equality, Don’t fake-convert, Polygamy and talaak, Akansha unwillingly converted to Nusrat, Hindu-Muslim marriages, Hindu-Muslim lovers’ experiences, Hindu girl-Muslim boy, Idols, pluralism, SRK-can you do it?, Zakir Naik, Christian-Hindu marriages, Jain-Muslim marriages, Brahmin-Muslim marriages, Bollywood and Interfaith Marriages.
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