ammu says: October 12, 2013 at 1:51 pm
i am a Hindu girl who loved a Christian. My parents allowed me to marry him but his family refused. My husband’s family forced me for baptism. My parents agreed for that because they believe in humanity than religion. i am so proud about my birth religion. i refused to change but my husband forced me alot and my mother in law. i became a christian for marriage and officially Hindu now.
We got married. I beleive in Jesus but i dont think that Christianity is the only way for salvation. My husband likes equality. He respect my Hindu beliefs. so am following Hindu prayers mostly and christian prayers in between. We visit churches and temple together and leading happy life. I am sure any “GOD WONT KILL PEOPLE..BUT PEOPLE WITH GODS KILL THEM”. Can any one tell iam doing right or wrong????
Villain in our life is mother-in-law, who inject slow poison of RELIGION in to our life, but am 25 year old. I dont want to change just for an in-law but same time i will make sure that my hus is happy.
i dont care if my children become christian. let them opt when they become major. i respect all religions in world..no one has seen God directly so who are we to change others?????????? -Ammu
.
Admin said:
Ammu,
This is a classical story on confusion between pluralists and exclusivists. You, your husband and your Hindu parents are pluralist while your mother-in-law and her church (and most Muslims) are exclusivist supremacist.
Your parents approved your baptism because they do not see any harm in accepting Jesus (and Allah) into your life; while for your mother-in-law and her church baptism means accepting Jesus Christ (Muhammad for Muslims) as only messenger of God and repudiating your former practices (no more Lord Krishna, Ganesh and Goddess Laxmi).
Before we go in details, let us give you bottom line messages:
1) do not to plan for a child till all dust has settled down (at least three more years),
2) remain financially independent by working outside home, and keep control over money (you will need it),
3) if possible, move 100 miles away from your mother-in-law and
4) now most important thing you need to do is to educate yourself about religions and then educate your husband to be a true pluralist. Please read all recommended articles below.
It would be a grave mistake if you “i dont care if my children become Christian”. Like McKenna Smith, why will you allow your children to be taught that Mahatma Gandhiji will go to hell because he was not baptized? Instead, we recommend not to put a religious label (read NO BBS) on your interfaith children and, like you said, “let them opt (to pick a religion they wish to follow) when they become major”. Meantime, plan to teach children from both faiths and let them decide for their own religious fate at their adult age.
Remember that after childbirth, your religious issue will explode 10X. Tell your husband that you will think of bearing a child only after he agrees not to baptize your children.
Lets cover a legal point. You said, “I became a Christian for marriage and officially Hindu now”. Remember, today legally you are a baptized Christian. For example, if you are no more today, against your parents wishes, you will be buried in a ground and given Christian final rites, not Hindu final rites. If this is not your wish, please “formally” convert to Hinduism and document it with proper witnesses. Legally, your husband does not have to know this.
Lies and deceptions are foundation of your married life. First, your bf did not disclose to you for many dating years that he and his family will not tolerate you as a Hindu. Further, your husband, “forced me a lot” to become something you were not, a Christian. If he wanted a Christian wife, why he dated a Hindu? Is he a love-Jihadi? On your side, you had no intention of being a true Christian but just to get married to your lover, you lied to their church and their Christian community. We hope you end this cycle of lies and deception. Tell your husband that you have formally converted back to Hinduism and you will not bear Christian-only children (no baptism) but will raise children who are 50% Hindu and 50% Christian.
More you submit to their irrational demands, more they will expect you to do. Someday you will have to raise your head and say enough is enough. Now it is that time to bring truth in front (say no BBS).
Now lets evaluate Who is God? We agree to your statement that “no one has seen God”. Religion is a matter of faith and there is no logic in faith. Christians believe that Adam was the first person born on this earth, while Darwin’s Law explains that we are evolved from monkeys.
Jews believe they are the Chosen People of LORD God, Jesus said, “No one comes to the Father except through Me.” (John 14:6) and “Who is not with me is against me.” (Matthews 12:12), Muslims believe that those who do not follow Allah as described by Muhammad will get Hell Fire on the Judgment day and Krishna said “I am the beginning, the middle and also the end of all beings” (Gita 10:20) and “As all surrender unto Me, I reward them accordingly. Everyone follows My path in all respects.” (Gita 4.11)”. Who is telling us truth? Is that Darwin, Torah, Bible, Koran or Geeta?
It is logical if some one tells us that all these scriptures were written in old times and should be interpreted with its context. If someone believes in this above statement, then there is no need for baptism, Shahadah/sunat, bar mitzvah or namasanskara for interfaith children. Alternatively, if one says that my God (or scripture and faith) is better than yours, then who’s God will win? (View video GURUMAA).
Today, churches are teaching that only baptized Christians will be saved, not Mahatma Gandhiji (McKenna). This is exactly opposite to what your parents taught you, “they believe in humanity than religion”. Now you have to decide if you are going to submit to demands from your in-laws, husband and their church to baptize your children and ignore humanitarian messages given by your parents. Let us know what you have decided. We are waiting right here. -Admin
More information: Interfaith marriage with equality, Hindu-Christian Marriage, Bible on Hindus? Christian-Hindu relationships, Marriage & Divorce laws.
Return to Home, Blogs, How to Share? Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, Book, Media.
Hi I am a Hindu boy and married to a Lutheran Christian girl since 3 years and we have a child of 1 year. We married under the special marriage act of India 1954. Few days back my wife told me to get baptised and get blessings from church as she is not able to eat the param prasad of church as in the eyes of church she had sinned marrying me and she will be out of church for 3 Sundays and the only way to get back to church is joint blessings as a couple. The church bishop told us we will get married in church in simple ceremony and instead of witness our certificate of marriage under special marriage act will be used as witness and that blessings will be done after I am baptised after I submit an affidavit that I am doing so on my own will. Me and my wife agreed to that we won’t be baptising our child till he attain the age of 21 and we both agreed to one more point that after getting the blessing and she after getting admitted to church once again I myself will again formally convert to Hinduism. I want from admin the best suggestions asd soon as possible. It’s my humble request and please tell me the best way to again convert to Hinduism with all legal documentation. Please suggest. Thanks
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=7493
What strikes me most out of the above post is the last sentence – “no one has seen God directly so ……….”. How can such statement be made without any evidence ? There are so many persons in the past and also in the present who claimed to have seen /experienced God. While going through criticism of religion by the rationalists/atheists, it appears that the religious people are such kind of people who have stopped thinking at all and do not possess discrimination to choose what is right or wrong. The rationalist/atheists look down upon the religious people as devoid of wisdom and intelligence and so deride them no end. Is such kind of attitude is justified on their part ? The rationalists/atheists ridicule the religious people on account of their beliefs but it has been observed that true religious persons admit the mistakes, vagueness, ambiguities and unscientific stuff mentioned in the sacred texts and see the essence of religions in the modern perspective. So far Hindu religious personalities are concerned, they are quick to assimilate scientific truths vis a vis religious truths so as to arrive at some kind of compatibility. Ammu is right that we must respect all religions. Even the rationalists/atheists follow some practices while living and these are :- 1. They believe in relationships of human beings such as mother, father, sister, brother, uncle , husband, wife, son, daughter and so on. You see there is no following of relationship among animals and low creation.” Relationship ” is a concept which has evolved just like “religion” and everybody is expected to abide by it faithfully. On a smaller level, humans are able to identify birth of humans and so on the basis of birth, even rationalists /atheists believe in relationship but on an infinite level, they cannot grasp the birth/origin or creators the whole universe. On account of this inability of humans to fathom everything in a crystal clear way, religion came into being. One can assume that religion is another name of inability of humans to comprehend this whole edifice of existence. The day scientists/rationalists/atheists come up with a satisfactory explanation of all this complex phenomenon, religion will lose it’s relevance. Till such date, they should abstain from making sweeping statements so as to antagonize the sensibilities of religious communities. 2. If rationalist insist on substantiation of concept of God, they are also not able to refute it convincingly and it seems that they feel just helpless to do so they utter statements like – ask the religious what made God, ask them to show exact distance of paradise from earth, ask them to explain resurrection, ask them to explain reincarnation, ask them to explain where God is at rest etc. etc. No doubt, there exist all kinds of ambiguities in religions and religion in itself an abstract idea and all abstract ideas cannot be proved as tangible things of the world. Like, we know about smell, taste, anger, lust, love, hatred, compassion, affection etc. etc. But can we demonstrate in tangible forms what exactly these are like ? It is only looking at the surface of human bodies that we get a glimpse of all this and scientists explain some chemical reactions for coming out of all kinds of emotions. Can they explain convincingly why do these occur and what is this kind of set up introduced in the universe at all ? 3. Man has made all kinds of complicated machines and robots but he has not succeeded in instilling a sense of self in all these. What is this sense of self ? Is it some kind of operator introduced in operating system itself because in man made set up, operator is distinct from operating system unlike in created beings. Unless, revered scientific community succeeds in explaining about it correctly and convincingly, religion will prevail. 4. Every one sees an infinite space all around and assumes it as some kind of nothingness. Is it sheer nothingness or a compact thing though invisible to human eyes. Even scientists assume that matter and energy cannot be destroyed. It means that whatever is existing and visible to our eyes is non-destructible and when we see disappearance and death of something, it means that it has only altered it’s form into another form. So the religious people believing that there is nothin like either birth or death is quite correct. 5. From the incessant volley of questions raised by rationalists, it seems that only they are curious to know. This assumption of their is not up to the mark, sometimes, the religious ones are more curious than they are. The curiosity of religious persons can be comprehended from the fact that they have gone to the extent of thinking over life after death, reincarnation. eternal life, heaven, hell. God, birth of creation and so on and even dared to explain these things in their own ways, though having reached wrong conclusions in the present perspective. What I want to convey that though the common people put a blind faith in the religious stuff today, the authors/ seers who envisaged all these set ups were no less inquisitive than anybody else today. 6. To sum up, I am of the opinion that both science and religion are like mind and heart of a human, while mind does all thinking for a human , heart gives it a gentle touch. Practical aspects play a significant role in the life of a human but emotions are also necessary to control the ferocity and other violent traits. Rationalists deserve to point out vagueness in religious texts but to reject the whole paraphernalia of religion is something not desirable. However it is the need of time that religious people shed off rigidity and usher in flexibility in their approach as adamancy is not conducive for a real growth either physical or spiritual. It would rather be fruitful if both, religious and rationalists come together and explain everything amicably between them and reveal the outcome to the whole humanity to see and judge and adept to the belief/non-belief bereft of ill will, animosity and hatred. Remaining poles apart, people will remain ever confused and deluded and so reciprocity is needed. In earlier times, no reciprocity was visible and tolerable but it is due to free expression all around, both streams are coming closer to explore mutually, this is a good indication. At present , the tendency is to flout only one’s own point of view and discard other’s, this is not working effectively and justifiably as rationalists are creating their blind followers and religious ones are multiplying their carbon copies. No genuine atheist/rationalist or thoughtful faithful is in sight. To witness such a scene, right thinking persons all around are also perplexed. If God is there, He must be full of mirth and if God is not there, what a terrible paradox and waste of time and energy ! It is a thing everybody should ponder over while living as death will sweep away everything and make us at rest once and for all !