daksha says: July 20, 2016 at 11:22 pm
Hi everyone,
I am in love with a muslim guy from 5 years, initially he is very good and now also he is good only,but day by day slowly he is trying to show my love towards muslim side. starting itself we discussed that caste or religion should never come between us and in love. He is very much love pet to his mom.
I already told to my parents about our love, as usual they rejected. me and my lover are in fight now he said he will change and as per my wish, but i am fearing to take risk. my problem is that if i go with him for sure i have to leave my family which will kill my parents accordingly. DO i need to risk my parents life by going with a risky guy?
he is not at all getting convinced to what I say. I gave many chances to him again and again whenever we get fight he abuse me and family lot. I dont know what step i have to take. He never feel my problem. for him always his family only importance. I do accept for it but there is a limit for all right? please suggest me wat step do i need to take now – Daksha
Admin says:
Dear Daksha,
We have seen many cases like yours on this site and thus there is no surprise for us for what you wrote. We will let you decide how you will manage with your parents but we will focus on convincing you for what is right for you.
You said two contrasting statements, 1) “we discussed that caste or religion should never come between us and in love” and 2) He is Muslim. Islam cannot be separated from government and family management; it has to be one and the same (where possible). He is Muslim and he WILL convert you. Only we are puzzled that why he lied to you all these 5 years.
Fundamentally, Islam and Hinduism are not compatible (for marriage). Islam will not let him marry a “Hindu” and for his Islamic Nikaah wedding you MUST convert to Islam. View below video below for more details. Hindus have too many liberties, including seeing God in many forms. Muslims consider this as polytheist practice and idol worshipping and to be corrected. There are many other conflicting views that will create major issues in Hindu-Muslim marriage (read mac).
You wrote some of these, and in sequence, “in love from 5 years… initially he is very good… day by day slowly he is trying to show my love towards muslim… love his mom… he said he will change and as per my wish … in fight now… he abuse me…” There are explanations for this exact sequence:
1) “in love from 5 years”: Muslims are suppose to proselytize non-believers. Love is the best vehicle to proselytize Hindus.
2) “initially he is very good”: First the fish had to be attracted to the bait till it gets hooked. You will not hear any of conversion talk in the first year.
3) “slowly ..towards muslim”: Once the fish is on the hook, now it is time to carefully remove the fish out of water.
4) “love his mom”: This is just an excuse. Actually his love for Islam comes first. Converting you to Islam is the ultimate goal.
5) “he said he will change”: In Islam, taqiyya (lies and deception) is allowed to achieve a goal.
6) “fight… he abuse me”: Muslims believe Koran is 100% truth and only Islam is a real religion. Christianity is based on false premises and Hinduism is not even a religion. One could go to heaven only through following Koran; otherwise you, the kafirs, are going to go to hell fire. Here you have a golden opportunity to go to heaven and it is puzzling for him why are you not grabbing such an opportunity? For this, he is frustrated.
Everyone has right to believe what ever. As a Muslim, he has right to ask you to convert. Only problem we have is—is he a true Muslim? A true Muslim will 1) perform namaz five times a day, 2) will give 2.5% of life asset in donation every year and 3) when a guy sees a girl, will lover his gaze and walk away (Koran 24:30). Apparently he has not done #3 with you for past 5 years. If he is not a true Muslim, then is he a love-Jihadi?
You also asked what should you do now. You have only two options: 1) Accept Islam (100% Islam, 0% Hinduism) and marry him or 2) dump him. Assuming #3 that he will be tolerant (to you as a Hindu) and secular is myth.
Who knows Islam may be a good religion for you. It works for 25% of people on this earth; actually Islam is the fastest growing faith. So start reading Koran and attend a local mosque.
Keep us posted for how it goes. Best wishes. -Admin
View videos: Interfaith Marriage with Equality, All you want to know about the Hindu-Muslim Marriage, Sharia: Hindu-Muslim Marriages,
Also read: Hindu-Muslim marriages, Hindu-Muslim lovers’ experiences, Koran on Hindus?, Love-Jihad, Don’t fake-convert, Polygamy and talaak, Akansha unwillingly converted to Nusrat, Hindu girl-Muslim boy, Idols, pluralism, SRK-can you do it?, Zakir Naik, Christian-Hindu marriages, Sikh-Muslim marriages, Malaysia in love, Marriage laws.
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leave that rascal , i know it will be difficult,but for your leave him
It is the muslim guys habit under the cover of Taqqiya doctrine to trap non muslim girls for sexual pleasure and multiplication of islamic population.
The whole world is disturbed by these islamic people for terrorism,murder, killing and you DAKSHA getting associated with a terrorist mind set person,.
You will become a prostitute under the hand of islamic guy(s), who pass on girls after sHort PERIOD sexual pleasure.
IF GOOD SENSE PREVAILS ON YOU, FORGET THAT GUY FOR EVER.
Daksha,
Dont trust him. Get yourself disassociated from him immediately.
Unfortunately if he could get you trapped in the name of marriage
you will be landing in a hot pan leading miserable life.
Hello Daksha, Based on your posts it clearly indicates the guy’s first love is Islam and then you. You should stay away from him and learn to let it go. I know it is very actually extremely hard when a girl is in love wit someone. I am going to share my personal experience with a Muslim guy where I almost got ready for marriage to him .
We were in love for more than 6 years we met in engineering college in Nasik . We were classmates and were in love Witt each other . He was from a rich family of builders. Until we cleared off our MBA everything was fine.
Problems stared when the word marriage came to our relationship. He started me honeycombing with his religion and made me come to Islamic holy sites . When he introduced me to his family his mother didn’t liked me and said when I will convert to Islam. After I talked to my parents they were ready for me to go with him along with Islamic conversion. Our marriage was fixed about 2 months from then. Her mother then stared meeting me and told be that I have to stop driving any vehicle and quit my job and focus on my future children . I was completely shocked by this statement . I was a school topper. A well educated engineer and a topper of the univ from where I cleared by MBA.
It as not easy for me to leave the job and my lifestyle. Actually I was not even ready for it . The job I was doing pays much more than my partner as well as I love my job . I talked about this to my boyfriend and he also told me to quit the job as working women aren’t good mother. I quietly left him and came to my room . And internal voices of my soul started me questioning whether the boy who I know for almost 6 years loves me or his religion or family .
I then texted him that I won’t be quitting my job and will continue to drive as it is a part of my lifestyle. He replied that it not possible and it will be a big problem . I took sometime and asked him to leave his religion for me and convert to any religion or become an aethist so no one has to compromise and we can live happily. The reply from him was very rude you can imagine it. I don’t have say much !
I now live with my family they have found a good man within our community he is very sweet and understands my lifestyle and is willing to compromise with me so we can live happily forever.
My advise to any girl in relationship with other faith person is to test whether the guy loves you more or less than his religion
There is no religion of love one must not leave his/her religion in order to marry him/her .
Your parents are your well wishers . Sometimes they are wrong sometimes they are right it is you who should decide whether they are right or wrong. If you always keep the word wrong on your mind that doesn’t mean they are wrong.
Diksha I hope you understand as a girl and a sister of you I think you should move on the guy is much more focused to his religion and your conversion rather than respecting your thoughts .
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=11453
Hi
Thanks for ur valuable reply.
I accept what all u said is true,bi am in confused state i dont know whether to trust him or not.bI am not in a position to know what is good or bad in him because many times i gave chance to him to change and respect women but he never,he is trying to part me from my friends by acting so innocently, he trying to seperate me from my family, finally his aim is to make me to place at corner of his home as slave, he knows that my family is very sensitive and they cant alive if i come out or marry him, but he never take this seriously and keep on telling hey forget them they are not parents like that he will tell. He is trying to prove his bad goodness with me and friends.
Now everyone thinking that i parted from him wantedly and blaming me more by saying you were 5 years is this correct decision like that, this torture i am not able to bear at anymore,
**if a girl run away with boy means then society says that she is very worst girl whom she left her parents literally,
**if a girl rejects a boy for the sake of family or some personal reasons again this society says she is a cheater
**final blame is on girl.
no one can stand from my side and answer me to my sad (situation).
**Did i do wrong by doing break up with him?
**should i have hurt parents for the things which my lover said he will ask me to change name, don’t prepare this food and that food and dont worship hindu god??
Suggest me please.
This is very concerning, “he trying to part me from my friends by acting so innocently,he trying to seperate me from my family ,finally his aim is to make me to place at corner of his home as slave.” He wants you to separate from the rest of world so he can control you.
Further, you said, “…fight he abuse me.” Do not be with an abusive person because after marriage it will get worst 10 times. Do not take any shit from him. If he continue to harass you, be firm (even call police).
Why are you feeling guilty?
Actually he should–for asking you to be something you are not.
Shame on him and his fanatic religious ideologies.
You wasted 5 years with this guy, that does not mean you have to waste the rest of life with him.
May be you make mistake in picking a wrong guy, but that does not mean you cannot correct it. Who did not make any mistake in life?
Do not have guilty feeling.
What you are doing is a very smart step in your life, congratulations!
Do that you feel is right to do.
Do not be submissive.
Live your life with dignity and pride.