Muhammad says: May 2, 2013 at 2:44 pm
I have noticed alot of copying and pasting , and no real views on the main topic. I am a revert (to islam) from Catholism, and married to divorced Asian woman. I had no problem with her not being a virgin, as i was not either, as i had a relationship before too.
I have grown to the life of a Muslim over the past 8 years, and am excepted in my community and mosque where i live. i believe that when children are sent to mixed schools, and then go on to college and university, each culture both east and west mix freely. where the problem lies is culture.
The elders of the Asian communities in the UK for example, not all of them, but the majority, think that to be a Muslim is all about culture. The elders can go around freely living the Western lifestyle but they want their women to be all cultural. Their young sons are to be married as soon as they are 17+, to a girl from pakistan now, because they believe they will be more cultural than the girls in this country. But this is not always the case, as young men meet English girls, have children with them, and then are promised to a girl from pakistan. It is not the fault of the boy as he doesnt want to upset his family as it will shame them in the so called community. That is culture.
Asian girls in the uk, have it hard, they get promised to someone they dont even know, sometimes from pakistan who cant speak English, have kids, and be treated badly. Then they feel trapped as they dont want to shame the family or let them down … culture again.
Im not sure if your figures are right (45-90% of Muslims marry outside their faith in the West) though, but since ive been married, Ive seen and heard alot of stories similar to the women on this site. Its a shame the family didnt let them chose their own partner fall in love, and get married, it does work.
Culture should stay in pakistan, not in the West … then everyone would be more happy. MasAllah. – Muhammad Isaq
Truth says: May 2, 2013 at 6:59 pm
So the whole terrorism is all about that we secular people don’t understand culture, and just by co incidence Muslims across all country are inclined towards killing kaffir ND destroying other religions. More just by co- incidence Muslim girls are killed for marrying a Christian or Hindu or Jew, may be its all culture, so its looks like all Muslims are following is there violent Islam religion and all Muslims derive their culture from it
……in plane words, Muslims just wants to say that terrorism has nothing to do with Islam! Which is not true even 1%. Please try your fake story again, btw do you know what Muslim countries reward punishment to Muslim who converts to another religion? If you have any truth in your writing try telling it.
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Hello every body,
Me a muslim girl(26 yrs) working in a mall in Kobe Japan and associated with a Jain boy aged 30 years and considering each
others nature and behaviour married, though my parents opposed, but
being financially independent, in Japan, they could not prevent me
to marry him. Before marriage we had sexual relations too considering
the local environments and free society.
I did not like the restricted and partial rules of Koran and using Hijab and so decided to marry Jain boy, who believes in non violence and vegetarian food.
My appeal to muslim girls not to hesitate to marry jain boys, if they fell in love with them. Avoid marrying muslim guys who are cruel,ill mannered, intolerant, violent, using abusive languages and threatening triple talaq method.Our marriage was solemnised in the Kobe Jain Temple in Japan and subsequently legally registered.
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=5367
Hi Admn.
A feeling of confusion has emerged among “ordinary people”, who doubt their ability to preserve their culture and fear being invaded by the customs and values of the other: the British citizens with a Muslim background. Doubt and fear commonly provoke reactions of shutting out or of rejection.
British Muslims need to pay more attention to the doubts and fears that their fellow citizens have. They have a duty to establish intellectual, social, cultural and political spaces for the development of trust and appeasement. This has to begin with an engagement in a clear discussion about Islam, about the practices and the values that Muslims promote. Islam is not a culture but a body of principles and universal values. One should not mix up these universal principles with a Pakistani, Turkish or Arabic way of living them.
Islam allows Muslims to adopt aspects of the culture they find themselves in, as long as it does not oppose any clear prohibition specified by their religion. While practicing their religion they can preserve certain features of their own culture of origin – in the form of richness, not dogmas – while integrating into British culture, which in turn becomes a new dimension of their own identity. No one asks that they remain Pakistani or Arabic Muslims, but simply Muslims; with time, they become Muslims of British culture. This is a process that is not only normal but desirable.
British legislation recognises and protects the fundamental rights of all citizens and residents. This common legal framework allows equality within diversity. The presence of Muslims has forced British culture to experience an even greater diversity of cultures. A British identity has evolved that is open, plural and constantly in motion, thanks to the cross-fertilization between reclaimed cultures of origin and the British culture that now includes its new citizens.
Seen from this perspective, the new British Muslim citizenship is enriching for the whole society. Muslims should live it and introduce it in this manner to their fellow citizens. Of course, this compels them to come out from the intellectual and social ghettos within which they have lodged themselves. Living together and building a truly multicultural society does not mean merely being satisfied with the existence of communities of faith or juxtaposed cultures, whose members ignore each other, never meet and remain enclosed within their own universe of symbolic reference points. Nothing should be stranger in our way of living and allowing for a mutual exchange of ideas between our communities, than a model of parallel lives, shielded beneath an illusion, which in reality is of mutual ignorance.
Our responsibilities are shared. Members of the so-called traditional British society can, at times, doubt their own identity and are frightened. When this happens they have to refuse any imprisoning reaction by attempting, for example, to draw the boundaries of what they may consider to be an authentic British identity which is “pure”. In any period of crisis, the temptation to fall back upon phantoms of national identity is stronger than ever as people are carried away by fear, spilling over into the same camp as populists of the extreme right, a phenomenon which we are unfortunately witnessing all over Europe.
We need to begin by working upon memories. From the Middle Ages, Islam has participated in the building of a European, as well as a British, consciousness in the same way that Judaism or Christianity has. From Shakespeare to Hume, the influences of Islamic civilisation on the literary and philosophical traditions of the time are innumerable. Horizons need to be broadened through the study of these sources, which should be included in the teaching curricula at both secondary and university levels. This wider, deeper and more subtle understanding of what has moulded British identity throughout history would naturally help all people in this society to open up towards each other, including towards Muslims, and to understand that they are not so very different or strange when judged by their values and hopes. A truly multicultural society cannot exist without an education in the complexity of what shapes us and in the common dimensions that we share with others, regardless of our differences.
The extension of this education consists of developing partnerships willing to engage together in social and political issues that affect us all, including discrimination (against women, minorities etc), racism, unemployment, and other social and urban political issues. British society must reach this new perception of itself collectively: with its people, all equal before the law, developing multidimensional identities which are always in motion and flexible enough to defend their shared values.
It remains imperative to distinguish between the social problems and the religious challenges. Muslim and non-Muslim citizens alike need to de-islamise social fractures – unemployment, violence and marginalisation have nothing to do with Islam or Islamic belonging.
Tariq,
Great thoughts shared at http://www.tariqramadan.com/spip.php?article204&lang=fr
We wish you come back to this site to guide Muslim girls in love with non-Muslims. We are looking for a good debate from intellectuals and researchers Muslim GUYs to come to this site to guide Muslim girls.
We hope to hear form you again and again.
What is the origin of Islam? Is it a culture or a religion? Please think for some time and come to a conclusion. My conclusion is it’s the Arabian culture mixed with the Muhammad’s superstitions along with his strategem to fulfill his two obsessions i.e. copulation and wealth/power.
Muhammad,
You have touched a very interesting subject matter. So, your point is… what Muslim do in UK is mostly due to cultural reason and Islam and Koran has very little to do with it.
If two families from a small village in India now settled in UK, would you expect them to act more or less the same way? Now add to the point, lets assume one is a Muslim and the other is a Hindu family, still would you expect them to act same way based on their relatively common culture? Do you think teachings from Koran and Geeta will have less influence on how they behave in UK?
Lets take your example. Your wife is a divorcee, probably due to Muslim “culture” issue (not religious). Now to marry her, you converted to Islam before your Nikaah. She proselytize you to convert to Islam, was it due to “cultural” reason, or was she trying to please Allah’s requirement that Muslim girl can marry to a Muslim boy only?
To your point, “Its a shame the family didnt let them chose their own partner fall in love”, lets assume you got in love with your girl friend but you declined to take that 5 minutes of Shahadah oath (conversion) because you want to remain what you are, that is Catholic. Are you saying Muslim families should let their daughters marry non-Muslim? Do you think their reasons are “cultural” and not “religious”?
We hope you will come back to guide other youths and teach other about all great things you learned from Islam.
Funny you mentioned UK, now I am a catholic and my girlfriend is muslim, both of us were born and raised here and we’re both Asians, we got together 6 years ago and at the point it was agreed that she didn’t have an issue with the religion, I have met her brothers who did want me to convert if I wanted to marry her but i refused,told them this is the 21st century and not some medieval period, now ever since then she has been getting beaten up regularly by her mum and she refuses to call the police because of family honour, to me it was like stop saying that! Anyways its come down to her getting a proposal and she told me last month that she refuses to leave home/get beaten up anymore simply cos I havent converted which i felt was foolish.
I felt robbed of my last 6 years this was the person I gave a big chunk of my life, we’re not teenagers we’re in our 30’s and still I feel that fear is instilled in her and I can confirm that she is absolutely terrified of her mum, even I am afraid to talk to her mum simply because I dont want her beaten up so its like what do I do now, thing is whether the muslim community lives in the UK or the US or India they way of thinking is backwards the only thing they have against me is the fact that Im a catholic nothing else! The mind boggles!