Anurag says: January 18, 2013 at 1:56 am
Hello Vicky,
Even if you Vicky convert and marry you muslim GF, you will not be happy at all. Better not to convert and follow the advice of Admin. Islam is the most cruel land barbaric religion in the present day time, no humanity and no submissiveness. If you both are earning, you can marry under special marriage act. If not earning, forget her.
I am also in love with a muslim girl, in HCMC, Vietnam, working in different companies but living in the same building. We have decided not to change religion but marry forever lasting relations. In the beginning, she wanted me too convert but I refused to do so. Now she has realized the realty and accepted my idea.
Good day. -Anurag
Admin says:
Anurag,
Bravo!! It is simple, as we always said, just say NO BBS.
What conversion has to do with your love? Why you want to convert to something you are not. Why to convert a rose to carnation?…. and if she desires for a carnation, plenty Muslim boys are around. Is your lover a love-proselytizer? Are you trying to please Allah by fake-conversion to Islam for marriage? Is God that stupid? Don’t fool HIM!
Anurag, it is easy to get married but VERY difficult to make the married life happy and long lasting. Is she a pluralist? Will she enter a Hindu temple (and you go to a Mosque)? Have you read Koran? Most important question in any interfaith marriage is…what will be the formal religion of our children? Have you decided if the child will have sunat circumcision and name of the children? Will she ever turn out to be like DEE‘s wife?
We are sure you are smart and clarified all these points. Read all articles suggested and come on this site to advise others (helping others will help you immensely). Best wishes. -Admin
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Also read: Islamic Women Today, Hymen Replacement Surgery, Hindu-Muslim marriages, Hindu girl, Muslim girl, Hindu boy, Muslim boy,
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Hi sisters,
In Islamic Egypt brides use hymen kits to “prove” virginity
The hymen is a vaginal membrane which normally ruptures and bleeds at
the first intercourse. For Egyptian Muslims and in other Islamic
countries it is assurance that the bride was truly a virgin. It is
customary
for a new groom to soak a handkerchief in the blood, step out of the
honeymoon chamber, and proudly wave it to a crowd of friend eagerly
awaiting the verdict. If this does not happen, the bride may be
abandoned.
That could be the case if a menstruation has already removed the
hymen,
yet a virgin girl may face rejection because she did not bleed.
God! What will make these animals at least part-way human? And when?
“Conservatives condemn the Artificial Virginity Hymen Kit as
technology that will promote promiscuity. Others say the furor over
the device raises disturbing questions about double standards.”
By Jeffrey Fleishman and Amro Hassan
October 7, 2009
Reporting from Cairo – Whether it’s seen as a clever little gadget to
help a woman keep a secret or a devilish deception that threatens
Islam, the Artificial Virginity Hymen Kit is not welcome in Egypt.
The kit allows a bride who is not a virgin to pretend that she is. A
pouch inserted into the vagina on her wedding night ruptures and leaks
a blood-like liquid designed to trick a new husband into believing
that his wife is chaste. It’s a wink of ingenuity to soothe a man’s
ego and keep the dowry intact.
Egyptian conservatives condemn the device as technology that will
promote promiscuity in a culture that forbids premarital sex. Their
protests are arising in a nation that over the last 40 years has gone
from miniskirts and secularism to hijabs and religious devotion. But
seldom have conservatives faced such brazen advertising.
“No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can
have your first night back any time,” states the website of Gigimo, a
Chinese mail-order company that sells the kit and other sexual
products, including sex dolls and bondage toys, worldwide. “Add in a
few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable.”
Members of the Muslim Brotherhood, which controls 20% of the seats in
Egypt’s parliament, have called for banning the kit and arresting
anyone selling it on the black market. Cleric Abdul Moeti Bayoumi has
issued a fatwa urging that peddlers of the $29.90 device be charged
with banditry and punished for spreading immorality and sin.
“Egyptian girls are normally afraid to lose their virginity before
marriage,” Sayed Askar, a lawmaker and member of the Muslim
Brotherhood, recently told parliament. “A product like that can make
it easier and tempting for girls who don’t have strong wills to commit
such a sin. It will be a crying shame and a blot on the government if
they allow the selling of this product in our markets.”
Lina Samaan, an accountant, said the furor raises disturbing questions
about her country and the double standards that often apply to women:
“I think it’s a shame that we are discussing a product like this. If
most girls don’t have sex prior to marriage only because they want to
keep virginity, then there is something wrong with the way we think,”
she said. “Sex is a right for every woman but unfortunately we started
turning to products like these because men — even non-religious ones
who have sex before marriage — wouldn’t marry a girl if she’s not
virgin.”
The emotion over the kit speaks to a traditional society that is
increasingly pious, whether it’s rich professionals seeking moderate
Islam on websites of progressive imams or poor and middle-class
families adopting strict religion as a buttress to the influence of
Western media and a loss of confidence in a state that has failed to
provide prosperity.
The government of President Hosni Mubarak is troubled by
ultraconservative Islam imported from Saudi Arabia and the Persian
Gulf. Egypt’s leading Muslim cleric, Mohammed Sayed Tantawi, is
considering forbidding the niqab, or face veil, at the university and
schools run by Al Azhar, Sunni Islam’s top educational institution. A
similar edict barring nurses from wearing niqabs has been loosely
enforced.
The Egyptian media quoted Tantawi telling a student that the “niqab
has nothing to do with Islam. . . . I know about religion better than
you and your parents.”
Many parents, however, did not grow up with the economic and social
problems that their children face. Single women have traditionally
lived with their families until they found a husband. But today’s
inflation, joblessness and poverty are forcing many couples to delay
marriage until money is saved and dowries are accumulated. With men
and women single longer, dating, breakups and natural impulses
challenge religion and tradition.
“Having something like the virginity kit can cause complete mayhem
within the Egyptian social life,” said Farid Ismael, a member of
parliament’s health committee. “It can lead to the spreading of vice
and the loss of all the good morals and values we had and that totally
contradicts with our Islamic beliefs.”
The kit — like surgical repairs to the hymen that Middle Eastern
women have relied upon for years — is marketed to offer a sleight of
hand. Such secrets keep prospective brides in the graces of their
families and avoid what in rare cases are honor killings of women
accused of promiscuity.
Choosing to have “sex or not is something every girl and woman should
decide regardless of the society’s perspective toward her,” said
Samaan, the accountant. “Even if she is religious then she shouldn’t
do it because of her religious belief and not in fear of other people
or fear that she will not get married if she’s not a virgin.”
“If a girl decided to have sex before marriage,” she added, “then God
already knows it and she shouldn’t hide it from anyone else.”
es Against Women and Children in the Name of Islam
Posted by Martin S Pribble on June 12, 2010 in Thoughts | 10 comments
Mohammed, the prophet of the Islamic world, married his last bride Aisha when she was just six years old, and the consummated the marriage with her when she was just nine years old. In Islamic states, partly because of this precedent, this practice still happens in fundamentalist countries like Afghanistan. Muslims will say that a child of six or seven is almost certain to be a virgin. Mohammed was at least 50 when he married Aisha.
The practice of forced marriages (as opposed to arranged marriages) in some Muslim states such as Afghanistan is very common. Some reports claim that somewhere between 60-80 percent of marriages in Afghanistan are forced upon the girls involved or without the consent of the girls. These marriages are seen as a way to resolve conflicts between families, or as a way to absolve someone of a wrongdoing. The girls are treated as they would treat cattle, and are given to these men as offerings.
Some reports also estimate that 57 percent of Afghani girls are married before the age of 16, and it is unusual to find an unmarried girl older than 18 years of age. The practice is justified twofold; that the girls are helping to keep the peace between families, and that the Islamic prophet Mohammed had set this precedent.
In Afghanistan the legal age to be married is 16, but many people ignore this law or claim they were unaware of it. The children in this situation are robbed of childhood, and as you will see, many are robbed of their life. This practice is abhorrent, and any civilised culture will see it as such.
In Nigeria, a 49-year-old Muslim Senator has reportedly married a 13-year-old girl, and has allegedly previously married a 15-year-old in 2006, citing that he paid a dowry of $100,000 to the parents for her. Although looked down upon by other ministers in Nigeria it is still happening.
Women in Islam have no rights, especially if they are non-Muslim, and these men get away with their evils because people are too afraid to stand up against the barbarity of the culture which the religion they follow has instilled in them. Threats of death are imposed upon those who would stand up against this. In Lahore, a man and his entourage of Muslim lawyers has threatened to “burn alive” anyone who will come to the defence of a 12-year-old servant of his, whom he raped and murdered.
Many girls will find themselves in a marriage with a man much older than they are, and will be given the sole duties of looking after the household and giving offspring to the man. Some men have multiple wives, and the women become a harem for that man. The men are often abusive to these girls, sometimes to the point where the girl should be hospitalised, but often is not. The beating of wives is seen as the “honourable thing to do”, for the wife must be kept in line with the wishings of the man and of Allah.
Often these girls will find themselves in these abusive relationships, and will seek a way out. But the way out is a problem in itself; if the girl were to leave she would bring shame upon her own family and her husband’s, and would be hunted down and possibly stoned to death or just beaten withing an inch of her life; if she stays, she may be beaten thus anyhow. Sometimes out of pure desperation, a girl seeking to be free from the bonds of this abusive relationship will choose self-harm rather than bringing shame upon her people.
In Afghanistan, it is believe that more than 10 women and girls choose self-immolation (warning very graphic content) as the escape from their bondage. Around the web there are numerous stories of women who, feeling there was no better way, have chosen to set themselves on fire rather than continue living in such conditions. Some girls die from their injuries. Some do not but are so badly scarred so as to lose their legs, or are severely disfigured by these burns. Those that live may wind up on the streets, homeless.
The culture in Afghanistan is such that women are treated as slaves, and in some cases, worse than dogs. Not only do they wear the burqa in public at all times, they are not allowed to leave the home alone, not allowed to speak to anyone they don’t know, and not allowed to make their identity known nor engage with any of their husband’s friends they may meet in the street. They are not treated as second-class citizens, rather as livestock that can produce more sons for the family.
People blame Islam for these practices. And yet, there are many more Islamic people who don’t practice this than do. Islam itself is not to blame wholly for these atrocities, rather the culture that bases itself upon Islam, then justifies these stone-aged practices based on the words of the Koran or the Hadeeth, saying it is God’s will that this be done. When a culture is poor and has little or no access to education, these kinds of barbaric practices continue to happen.
The culture in Afghanistan is sick. The barbarism and sheer disrespect for human rights that occurs there is all so often backed up by the perverse and outmoded words of their holy books. This illness in the Afghan culture continues, even after the ousting of the Taliban, who were ultra conservative and would set upon women with batons for showing ANY skin, but it is not much better now.
While this culture is deeply ingrained in their societies, these practices in the name of Islam shows it toi be, in its extreme, nothing more than an ultra-conservative ultra-violent “boy’s club” where it members all look after each other. And as sickening as all this is, nothing seems to be getting better.
These girls stories are the same story I have heard again and again of extreme desperation, of girls who see their only escape from forced marriage as being self harm. It is gut-wrenchingly sad to see such lives destroyed by the greed and stupidity of men. Here is an example of one girl’s account of the horrors she has faced at the brutal hands of an extreme Islamic patriarchy
Hello readers,
I have read almost all comments on this site and life stories of various girls of different faiths and attempting to marry outside their faiths considering various parameters.
I am from Argentina, originally from asian muslim country.Myself born and brought up in the environment of this country only. Realizing various evil practices in islamic faith, I have decided not to marry any guy from this faith and live blissfully with different faith guy.
Incidentally I am a working girl too and in love with a Hindu Brahmin boy of my company, who hails from Indonesia. I have found him suitable and compatible for me as my soul mate in all respects, without changing my religion. My parents wants me to marry a Saudi Arabian, which I have refused straightaway.
Seeking your valuable advices.
Thanks for your attention.
Comment to Aamira at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=4221
Hello readers,
Who would have thought a wee little packet of fake blood could threaten to unravel an entire culture. But so great is the threat of the “Artificial Virginity Hymen” — a kit that helps women fake their virginity — that prominent Egyptian conservatives are calling for an all-out ban. Not only that, they are also demanding the exile of anyone who traffics it.
Longtime Broadsheet readers will no doubt remember the item at issue, which is made in China and sold by an online sex shop. Once inserted into the vagina, the gizmo leaks fake blood. The product hasn’t changed since I puzzled over it last year, but the price sure has: It’s selling for a pricey $30, instead of $14.90. It seems the creators have realized that, while similar technology sells for just a couple bucks at a Halloween superstore, they have hit a marketing gold mine. They’ve also hit a cultural nerve.
The kit “encourages illicit sexual relations,” declared Abdel Moati Bayoumi, a respected Egyptian religious scholar, according to the Associated Press. He added: “I think this should absolutely not be allowed to be exported because it brings more harm than benefits. Whoever does it should be punished.” On a similar note, Sheik Sayed Askar said, as the AP paraphrased it, that “the kit will make it easier for Egyptian women to give in to temptation.” On the Muslim Brotherhood Web site, he wrote: “It will be a mark of shame on the ruling party if it allowed this product to enter the market.”
If a woman in the Middle East fails to bleed on her wedding night, she can face shame, abuse and even death. Sure, many women don’t bleed when they lose their virginity. Yes, hymens are often torn through non-sexual activities. True, there exists no way to prove a woman’s virginity. But, la-la-la, they aren’t listening to any of that medically accurate naysaying! Bloody the sheet or else.
The truth is Muslim women are already artificially making that happen, regardless of whether they’re virgins (see above: Virgins don’t always bleed). Outlawing the “Artificial Virginity Hymen” won’t change that. Egyptian women will still have hymenoplasties, which are outlawed in the country but take place nonetheless, get doctors’ certification of chastity — which can be forged or real, at least to the extent that such a thing can be legitimate — or come up with a creative home remedy. Given the high stakes, this will always be the case. To think otherwise is willful denial or utter foolishness, or both.
Dear Anurag,
Despite judicious decision, I would point to a word of caution though. The next issue could be the children’s upbringing and the impact of Muhammad’s teachings on them. Must find a way to fend off the effect of Muhammad’s discourses on your progeny. The best way could be to eliminate the source, the ignorance of your wife regarding Muhammad’s life style. You should know yourself first and let her know in a friendly way. She must understand that her life will become a hell on the earth if you (her husband) started following the teachings of Muhammad with respect to marital affairs.
The sooner you do, the better it is.
Congratulation Anurag.
Hopefully you both have understood pros and cons of interfaith marriages. Being VN, you will not have any problem to marry with your muslim GF.
When are you going to marry?
God bless