Arun says: June 22, 2019 at 12:25 am
My name is Arun, a hindu and want to marry a Muslim girl. she is willing to convert into a hindu and acquire an appropriate hindu name. we are wishing to marry without our parents knowing about it. She is a college student and hence a name change will change her name in college certificate. What is the best way available to us? -Arun
Arun says: June 24, 2019 at 3:12 am
My parents are actually an jnterfaith couple.weel dad’s hindu. Mums Christian. Due to this same fact, they had faced problems in my school admissions and so on bcoz of religion difference. This is the reason why she wants to become a Hindu. It’s more like becoming a Hindu while still following the Muslim culture she was taught
i.e. following both religions and cultures.
We actually planned for a marriage bcoz there is every chance that she will be forced to marry someone against her will. 8 months back, a brahmin friend of mine helped us to conduct a marriage ceremony and so She already secretly has a mangalsutra in her neck. It’s now the legal proceedings of the same that haunt us.
Should we find ourselves in a situation where we will be forced and stressed upon by our parents to part ways, then the marriage certificate will be our only escapade as my dad is a lawyer and knows the legal significance of the same.
We find ourselves in a situation where we can’t leave each other and our parents. So I feel that this maariage will be our last resort. Please guide us sir.. -Arun
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Hindu MUST Convert to Marry a Muslim
The marriage ceremony was conducted between us and religiously we are a married couple bcoz as per my frnd, these kind of hindu ceremonial marriages are conductable between a Hindu and non hindu.
I am afraid that it has no legal bearing as only the ceremony was conducted and no registration was made by him.
There are certain people in her family who are not Muslims but still married her family members. There are from different religions yet live a peaceful life. but all of them were know to their parents and partners from a very young age. So despite the difference in religion her family members agreed to the marriage considering their
long bond of friendship. I unfortunately have no such advantage.
I hold a high esteem in her family. Our parents consider us friends. She is basically from a low income family while my parents are rich. Yet I was able to sort out her financial problems related to education and also had helped her a lot.
Her family isn’t orthodox. Yet, have a male frnd is highly unacceptable in her family. Deposit that, I Maintain a cordial relationship with her parents due to the above mentioned facts.
Also we are University rank holders in our graduate courses which also helps us evade from any doubts rising against us in name of studies.
But all these cordial bonds tend to change once we inform our parents of our relationship.
All we look for is a legal remedy that proves our married status to help us out in unfavourable situations.
Are there any loopholes in the special marriage act that can help us marry each other while still avoiding all the compulsory procedures like sending notices to our homes, to our marriage a secret till the right time comes..?
Hello Arun,
The Hindu marriage without registration has no legal bearings. If you both are Hindus, why not find a Hindu priest perform and register marriage under the special marriage act? Check with Arya Samaj also. https://interfaithshaadi.org/arya-samaj-marriages-interfaith-couples/
The Special Marriage Act 1954, there is a notification requirement and there is no other option there. However, do go meet local marriage registration office (where you submit your Special Marriage Act paperwork) and ask them who is qualified to be your guardians for this notifications.
This Akansha/Nusrat first married by the Special Marriage Act and apparently the guy’s parents were not informed. https://interfaithshaadi.org/7828/ We do not know how that was managed there.
Still sir. Our actual will is to maintain our originality as it was before meeting each other, rather than imposing our desires on each other. The problem with secret marriage act is the procedure to send a notice to our respective homes for address verification. and other such procedures that might expose our secret to our parents do exist. Can u please suggest any way wherein we can bypass such exposing problems and help us keep this court marriage a secret until the time we decide to reveal our matter to our parents??
We understand your situation. Simple answer to your problem is… Arya Samaj wedding. They will take care of the marriage without informing to your parents. Do reach out to Arya Samaj in your town/city. Let us know how it goes.
Shirk is the biggest sin greater than Zina itself. And Hindus are polytheists not monotheists and it is 100 percent surity. And the logic is given that they need a form but why this particular form . God doesn’t need any form to reach him which is fundamentally against Islam to begin with. Arabs were monotheists but they corrupted with polytheism same as Hindus. So no if you are muslim there is not any form of idols are allowed at all.
Why are you talking like Islam has monopoly over all other belief systems, including being an atheist/LGBT? Why people can’t have choices? Apparently, Arun’s gf is not at all like you.
And Hindus are polytheists not monotheists and it is 100 percent surity.
How can be 100% sure when -Rigveda 1.164.46 said…Ekam sat vipra bahudha vadanti
Are you 100% sure that all that is written in the Koran is 100% truth; including halala, polygamy, recommended killings and more.
God doesn’t need any form to reach him
God does not need Kaaba and God don’t care if you bow five times a day to Saudi Arabia direction. If Muslims wish to do, it is their choice. Just like that, Hindus have choices to pray God many ways and Christians have rights to believe Jesus is a Son of God. Do you have problem with choices of others? Are you trying to say only Muhammad’s teachings are truth and all followers of other faiths are kafir?
Since we are Muslims so we belive Islam is truth while polytheism like hinduism is false to the core. And irony is you call others to marry court marriage while here you are advocating Hindu marriage. And if a girl undergoes Arya smaji marriage she ceases to be a muslim . Irony is the girl doesn’t know that we are better off these type of Muslims.
We are not clear about this statement, “Irony is the girl doesn’t know that we are better off these type of Muslims.” We wish the girl also come on this site to get direct knowledge from all sites. Lets hope someone is guiding her for what is best for her.
Gokusan, you have to know that there are so many religions on this earth; as Allah has desired. For this reason, your statement “Since we are Muslims so we believe Islam is truth while polytheism like hinduism is false to the core” is useless for us or to Arun. This just show your supremacist exclusivist ideologies that has killed millions on this earth. A Hindu may say simply reply to you “Islam is false to the core”.
If the girl has even 10% Islam into her blood, it is better to marry only by court marriage thus preserving her interest. We wish she comes on board to express what does she want to do or believe.
Wait and watch.. Barbaric Islam will be in history book. Millions are leaving islam every year. Just check ex-muslim sites..
You forgot to add millions are joining Islam too.
Hi Arun,
My parents are actually an interfaith couple.
Interesting! Do you think your mom or dad or both will be against you marrying a Muslim?
It’s more like becoming a Hindu while still following the Muslim culture she was taught
She has to be ready for it. Further, her parents may get lots of pressure from their community to stop you doing so. Generally Muslims will want you to convert to Islam.
We actually planned for a marriage bcoz there is every chance that she will be forced to marry someone against her will.
This will be too sad. We hope she will have choice to make.
8 months back, a brahmin friend of mine helped us to conduct a marriage ceremony
This has limited legal bearing, unless you register your marriage under the Hindu Marriage Act. Government has to know that you are married to enforce or approve it. Has the Brahmin friend document the marriage? Once you are legally married in government books, parents have limited say left. However, documenting the marriage means the divorce will be also very difficult if you two decide (based on pressure from parents) not to proceed with your planned marriage.
We find ourselves in a situation where we can’t leave each other and our parents.
This is always true and youths (and parents) get into very difficult situation. Both sets of parents will/may make your life as difficult as possible. Ultimately who ever is weak, will have to give up.
The marriage ceremony was conducted between us and religiously we are a married couple bcoz as per my frnd, these kind of hindu ceremonial marriages are conductable between a Hindu and non hindu.
I am afraid that it has no legal bearing as only the ceremony was conducted and no registration was made by him.
There are certain people in her family who are not Muslims but still married her family members. There are from different religions yet live a peaceful life. but all of them were know to their parents and partners from a very young age. So despite the difference in religion her family members agreed to the marriage considering their
long bond of friendship. I unfortunately have no such advantage.
I hold a high esteem in her family. Our parents consider us friends. She is basically from a low income family while my parents are rich. Yet I was able to sort out her financial problems related to education and also had helped her a lot.
Her family isn’t orthodox. Yet, have a male frnd is highly unacceptable in her family. Deposit that, I Maintain a cordial relationship with her parents due to the above mentioned facts.
Also we are University rank holders in our graduate courses which also helps us evade from any doubts rising against us in name of studies.
But all these cordial bonds tend to change once we inform our parents of our relationship.
All we look for is a legal remedy that proves our married status to help us out in unfavourable situations.
Are there any loopholes in the special marriage act that can help us marry each other while still avoiding all the compulsory procedures like sending notices to our homes, to our marriage a secret till the right time comes..??
There will be notifications and one month waiting in the Special Marriage Act 1954. Best option will be Arya Samaj where they may perform a quick marriage without notifications.
On “There are certain people in her family who are not Muslims”, is it really? Are you sure they are not converted to Islam? How did they got married, by the Special Marriage Act or nikaah (meaning conversion)?
Just asking.How religious is she?
Hi Arun,
First tell us why you wish to marry without parental approval? After marriage, are you planning to stay with parents as married couple or are you personally financially in sound situation to manage your married life on your own? What if she gets pregnant on the first month, will you be able to support your family without parents? Best would be to take a few years to enjoy wonderful dating life and take time to work with parents.
Has she talked to her parents? Sometimes, Muslim parents and community are very strict on this issue and may take some harsh step (like donor killing). Have you thought about yours and her safety?
Is she willing to convert to Hinduism? Is she doing just out of love for you or she really does not like practices in Islam?
Age wise, you are adults and thus have legal rights to marry without anyone’s consent. You may contact a local Arya Samaj office or consider the Special Marriage Act 1954.
Why are you stuck on name? You can marry with her original name. You may have one legal name and another used name. If you get married and she opt to use a new name, yes, a new name will go on the college certificate.
You are too young now and wish you consider to take a few years to think all these issue. Best wishes.
We are actually postgraduate students in the same class. We haven’t yet Presented our matter to our parents as it might result in a loss of our educational career. When we finally present it to our parents at some point next year, if her parents decision goes against us, she might be forced to marry with someone else. This marriage is for the sake of safety.
Although we marry each other, we won’t yet start out marriage lives yet.that is until we settle our parents, get financially independent enough to lead independent lives. So we will essentially be staying in our respective homes till financial independence.
We are not fans of eloping and leave behind our parents. It is mentally unacceptable to us. This idea of marriage registration is to help us out a situation wherein we are forced to leave behind this relation of ours.
What would be the best option sir???
She is willing to convert into a Hindu out if the love for me.and out of safety for our future kids because there might be unwanted problems if our children have parents from different religions legally.but we will follow a Hindu Islamic culture after our marriage and her conversion.
And her parents won’t agree to her conversion but aren’t cruel enough to kill their child in name of honour killing. She wants to change her name as she is Muslim and a Muslim name is simply unacceptable in Hinduism.
Dear Arun,
I am glad you both are highly educated and have good plan. You are right in the sense of exploring all options now. Your options to get married: 1) the Special Marriage Act 1954 (civil wedding; one month notice and then get married), 2) Islamic nikaah where you (Hindu) will have to convert and 3) marriage by the Hindu Marriage Act where she has to convert. The Arya Samaj may plan a quick wedding and help you for it.
If possible we highly recommend you to focus on your studies now and get good education/grades. Once you both (or at least one) have good jobs, all of a sudden you will realise that you are powerful to do that is right.
Getting married now and later plan to live with each other is not a good strategy. Get married when ever you are ready to live like husband and wife. This is because–it is easy to get married but divorce is always lots painful and lengthy. First be ready for the married life and then marry.
Saif and Kareena or SRK-Gauri Khan are the best example to follow. However, they are celebrities and can get away with a lot. You should expect lots of resistance from parents and community for a long time to come. Once you are on your own, you will have more strength to get over all difficulties.
Why she has to change her religion and first name? You can learn to live with what ever she is.
Is she okay giving up her Islamic faith? How much faith is important to her? Does she read Koran? Does she perform namaz or keep Rosa? If she is not religious now, how was her childhood as far religion is concerned? What ever deep in her heart, will come back later in her life. For this reason, be mindful of her faith.
My parents are actually an jnterfaith couple.weel dad’s hindu. Mums Christian. Due to this same fact, they had faced problems in my school admissions and so on bcoz of religion difference. This is the reason why she wants to become a Hindu. It’s more like becoming a Hindu while still following the Muslim culture she was taught
i.e. following both religions and cultures.
We actually planned for a marriage bcoz there is every chance that she will be forced to marry someone against her will. 8 months back, a brahmin friend of mine helped us to conduct a marriage ceremony and so She already secretly has a mangalsutra in her neck. It’s now the legal proceedings of the same that haunt us.
Should we find ourselves in a situation where we will be forced and stressed upon by our parents to part ways, then the marriage certificate will be our only escapade as my dad is a lawyer and knows the legal significance of the same.
We find ourselves in a situation where we can’t leave each other and our parents. So I feel that this maariage will be our last resort. Please guide us sir..
You are right sir.but after marriage there will be a change in initials.also a copy of the notice will be sent to our homes which may expose our intention of secret marriage.which is the main reason why we didn’t opt for court marriage.is there any way by which we can keep this marriage of ours a secret if we opt for marriage under special marriage act???
The thing is a muslim can’ be a Hindu since Idol worshipping is haram to the core .
Who is worshipping idol, ideal or idle is debatable.
A Hindu may use a murti to focus on God or a Muslim may use Kaaba to focus on God; we see it the same.
A Hindu may be glorifying Krishna and a Muslim to Muhammad, it is their choice and the other should not say it is wrong.
We believe there should be liberty and freedom to believe and follow how ever one wants.
God is not patented by some one and God is not dictated by any book. God is loving to all and how ever one desires to reach him/her/it, it should be okay to God.
As per Koran, it is haram to not follow 24:30 (meaning not to date). Apparently this girl is not a Muslim to start with. If she does not believe in 24:30, then there should not be any issue she following Hindu ways of reaching Allah.
You are right sir.but after marriage there will be a change in initials.also a copy of the notice will be sent to our homes which may expose our intention of secret marriage.which is the main reason why we didn’t opt for court marriage.is there any way by which we can keep this marriage of ours a secret if we opt for marriage under special marriage act???
Yes sir. We actually love both religions.but depsite that very fact, there will certainly be a stage wherein we ll have kids and when it comes to that situation, there will be many unwanted problems as having a Hindu dad and Muslim mother might appear uncommon and raise a few eyebrows.and from the experience of our parents, there will be many unwanted complications and the real hardships will unfortunately affect our kids the most.
We were actually willing to marry with this purported religion change until we learnt about that single fact. So we planned to do the same. She ll live as a Muslim. Leave an Islamic lifestyle. But for the sake of our kids, she ll hear a Hindu name for avoiding unwanted legal problems.
Still sir. Our actual will is to maintain our originality as it was before meeting each other, rather than imposing our desires on each other. The problem with secret marriage act is the procedure to send a notice to our respective homes for address verification. and other such procedures that might expose our secret to our parents do exist. Can u please suggest any way wherein we can bypass such exposing problems and help us keep this court marriage a secret until the time we decide to reveal our matter to our parents??