karina says: October 20, 2015 at 11:12 am
hi admin,
my bf and i been in a relationship for 3 years now. both of us are malaysian. i am a muslim and he is a catholic christian. we really want to be together. we tried and been searching for solution in our case. we went to churches and mosque and found dead end to solve this. both mentioned that he needs to convert in order to marry me. he had been counselling by 2 fathers of his church because he loves me and i love him too. both of us tried to break our relationship but it is too strong. and we end up getting back together within a week. Both of us working in malaysia and wish not to leave this country.
His family and i have a good relationship but his mom still didn’t know about us. But i know his mom know about us. in the same time, i think his mom is trying to introduce him to few of christian girls. As for me, i just have few bad experience with malay guys. Hence, that’s the reason why i don’t believe in malay guys anymore. My family knows about my bf, as a very close friend. but i can tell that my mom know, but she never pressure me. because of past relationship.
I’ve been thinking about RCIA (to convert to be a christian). But he is too scared that i will be punished by malaysian law by doing it. what he wants is a church wedding, thats why i am thinking about converting. all i want is just to be with him. to me, religion is ruled by ONE god. it just the mainstream are different. So, yeah..it doesn’t really matter to me. I pray in my own way. Not the religion way, but my own way.
We searched and found few options but cannot decide which one will works for both of us.
1. Eloped –> get married in some other country such as singapore. come back to malaysia and live as single? how about when we decide that we want to expand the family?
2. Tell both our moms, the actual things that going on and pray for the best. I actually know the answer for this. Both of our moms most probably want conversion. (If we tell his mom about us, worst case scenario, his mom would be having heart attack. stupid idea is kidnapping his mom and bring her to nearest hospital, you know, just in case. to make thing even worst, his mom most probably forced him to marry other christian girl. As for my mom, her things is simple, my bf needs to convert.)
3. ask my bf to fake-convert to muslim and marry me (without his mom knowing) and (secretly) re-convert back to christian. I would take the class and get baptised and do church wedding. Can the civil wedding be done in singapore and later we have a church wedding in malaysia?
I desperately need help and advice as both of us really loves each other soo much and we want this to work out. -Karina
Admin says:
Dear Karina,
You are a wonderful human being created by God in this wonderful world. One may think you have liberty and freedom to do that you wish, but, unfortunately, that is not true. When we hear stories like you, we feel like crying. There is nothing we could do, other than to hear your frustration. These religious institutions have created concrete SILOs and will make your life HELL right here. You have neither liberty nor freedom to use your own brain, sorry!
Silo#1: Christian church will not allow you to marry in their church unless you convert to Christianity.
Silo#2: If you convert to Christianity from Islam, punishment for apostasy could be stoned to death. Well, this is in theory but Malay government and your Islamic community will certainly make your life hell and you will have to run to save your life.
Silo#3: A Christian cannot marry (Nikaah) to a Muslim girl unless the Christian convert to Islam by Shahadah.
Silo#4: Yes, you can marry by court in Singapore but when you return back to Malaysia, ultimately, you and your children will have to announce your faith as Islam on your/their ID cards.
Being in love, you may think fake-conversion is a solution. You convert to Christianity for the church wedding and he converts to Islam for the Nikaah. However, tell us what religion label will go on your children’s ID card? What will you do when a relative informs to Malay Sharia police that you have converted to Christianity?
Who’s God will win? … we believe Allah will win over Jesus (or the Father God). Why? In general, in such war between Gods, only the most fanatic will win. Malay laws are strict and there is no way around for you. This is not about your “faith”, but who’s God will rule over others! This is dirty politics. This is about survival of churches and mosques. None of them cares what Karina wishes to do!
So, where is liberty and freedom for you to do right thing? Not in Malaysia.
You have three options:
1) To do right thing, move out to non-Islamic countries (Singapore or West) and settle there. If not,
2) forget this “love” or
3) trap him into converting to Islam (poor guy!).
Karina, sorry if we are hard on. We know you are an innocent victim of this man-made-religion(s).
To all readers, we have created this web site to expose these religions institutions and religious fanatics for their irrational demands on youths in love. We hope you will join us in expressing your frustration. -Admin
mrw says: January 6, 2016 at 7:02 am
Hi scc, would advice you to research the marriage laws of your bf’s country. A lot of non-Muslim countries allow for interfaith marriages without conversion. Most of the criteria is just filling up paperwork and be in the country for X days before the marriage. So, if the laws permit, just get married there and register your marriage there. But do note that you will not be able to register your marriage in Malaysia at all. This will have its own set of implications (e.g. both of you will not be able to settle in Malaysia, and if you have children, they might not qualify to be Malaysian, etc). Good luck and all the best! -mrw
Also read: Malaysian Muslims in love, Fake-conversion, Interfaith marriage with equality (Video), Hindu-Christian Marriage, Will Gandhi go to Hell since he was not Baptized?, Bible on Hindus?, Idol-Worshippers, I am a Christian mother, I converted without knowledge of my family, I am Christian getting married to a Hindu, Do all Christians go to Heaven?, Ignorent Molly trying to convert a Krishna believer to Christianity ..a video, Namastey London movie…intolerant Christians ..a video, All religions are not same, A Hindu America?, Why I am a Hindu?, A fundamentalist Christian, Why I came back to Hinduism?, Dharma is not the same as religion, Text book on How to convert Hindu Students to Christianity.
Return to Home, Blogs, How to Share? Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, Book, Media.
Hi, I’m Malaysian Christian and my boyfriend is Malaysian Muslim, and we’ve been together for almost 5 years now. We have tried to break up a few times due to this uncertain future, and even tried to use distance (I’m studying in the UK while he is still in Malaysia) to help with the breakup. However, when my family realised how serious we were getting, they forced us to break up as they were scared I would have to convert (they have no issues with him otherwise). I just wanted to ask if there is any way we could be together legally? We are open to moving, as long as we can come back to Malaysia to visit our family. In particular, I would like to know if one of us were to obtain a Singaporean PR after working there for a few years, would it be possible say to get married to my Malaysian boyfriend without conversion? Then later apply for a PR for him too. Please advise, as we really do love each other and it is really so unfortunate for religious laws in Malaysia to break us up. Thank you.
Reply at https://interfaithshaadi.org/?p=13423
Hi Admin,
I am from Malaysia, devorced and have two kids. After 9 yrs suffering of my previous marriage life. And now I fall in love again with my boyfriend he is single, religion is RC from Kerala, India. We are 2yrs in relationship. And we decided to get marry But where we should get marry ? Because he don’t wanna convert to Muslim because of parents and definitely his parents won’t accept me because I am Muslim women have two kids from my previous marriage. All these won’t be a problem to him because he is ready to marry me and settle at some where that country law can accept. This marriage have to hide from his family because of few reasons. He won’t convert to Islam and I don’t Wana force too. As long as he is truly love me n kids that will do.And I do believe one day he will accept Islam in his life. In Malaysia definitely won’t allow us and if we settle in India his father will surely find out too. And we will get in trouble. He is trying to manage both his parents and me. So he decided to move from India and settle some where that he can marry me without converting. And he will visit parent in a while.And my side I don’t have parents since childhood so I have no problem to move out from Malaysia. My question is..
1) Where we should get marry ? We plan to migrate to Australia. Can we successfully marry there? and where I can refer all the marriage procedure in Australia.
2) Is it possible nikah without syahadah? Seems he refused to convert.
3 month we have been thinking about this problem. And I am getting depressed day by day. And I am ready to convert to Christian too if we can’t find solution for this. But that will be my last resort decision. He also no problem if we expand family I can raise my kids with my Islam religion. Please help me to solve problem. And I and some advise what should I do. TQ.
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=11491
there is no other way to married a christian guy without converting him to muslim in malaysia ? im a muslim girl living in malaysia but our law didnt allow a muslim to convert other religion but i really wish to marry and stay happily with him . please suggest me a way admin
Your government does not allow you to convert and even does not allow to marry someone from other faith. Moving out of M.sia is the only option we see.
if i move out then can i come back malaysia and register our marriage ?
how is the procedure if we plan to get married out from malaysia . which country will accept this type of problem ?
Unfortunately it is very hard. Other countries may accept you as an immigrant for different reasons, mainly due to your education and good job.
We are very sad that your Islamic government has made all these difficult laws for lovers like you. We do not know what else to say.
Hi, i have a question and this answer will really help to decide how should i move forward in my relationship with a Muslim guy. I’m a Malaysian Christian and he is a Malaysian Muslim. We both know there is no way we can get married here without having me to convert. We are planning to get married in UK and live there instead. Will this solve the legal problems (let’s not go talking about how are we raising our kids’ religious view cos we don’t plan to have kids). My only question is, is we register in UK and settle there, do I need to change my religion in any legal documents? Will I be caught by Malaysian law? Thanks a bunch!
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=10747
Y can’t u marry him without bringing it to ur parents notice ?
Once u both get kids ur family won’t have any problem.
Kumar, you have to understand that they live in Malaysia where there are two parallel national laws. One Sharia laws applicable to Muslims and the other to all. As per law, a Muslim MUST marry to a Muslim. You cannot register your Muslim marriage to non-Muslim. Further, every Malay citizen have to carry an ID card with religion clearly label on it. So it is not parents but national laws. There is no way around, unless they move out of Malaysia. Read scc to understand more.
i didn’t kno abt it admin.
Isamic countries and Sharia laws are barbaric to non-Muslims. They are absolutely selfish, to grow Islam at the expense of the rest. In any country where there is Islamic majority (like 60% and Sharia), it is time the rest of them have to pack and move out or convert to Islam. This is what the history tells us. This is what is going on in Afganistan, Pakistan, Bangla Desh and Kashmir. We predict the same in India one day, so plan an exit plan for your great grandchildren or them being Muslims.
I cried reading this.
Karina, I feel sorry for you. I’m almost in the same situation…we’re both trapped in this fanatic religion. and I’m also in love with someone from another.
The reality of religion, controlling every aspect of your life. Disgusting.
Thank you for sharing this, admin.
Islam religion is from God, so you don`t want god controlling your life, okay, but when you face any serious difficulty and face problem where you have no solution, you cry god help me, help me, you start saying things which only religion taught you
If one removes Muhammad out of Islam, there is nothing left. Islam is a religion created by Muhammad. All religions are of God (and different leaders/apostles/devas).
he he he 😀 admin.. why u are doing comedy here, i dont know..
I’m sorry if I sounded too condescending before. Sometimes I feel to entrapped that I get a bit emotional.
In life, there are ups and downs. So down, that crying is inevitable. When that happens, I just cry. Then I get up again. I believe there is no problem without solution. We need to be strong and move forward, that’s all.
I have my reasons for not believing in my old religion anymore, but I won’t tell you to leave yours either. Everyone is entitled to their own belief. I respect yours, as long as you don’t intend to harm others. It’s all good.
what Reasons do you have ? can you expres it here we will try to solve ur Questions
scc, can you give us more details? We may be able to help with more specific information.
Thank you again, admin.
I’m from Malaysia. Muslim by birth, thus labelled as such. My boyfriend and I plan to get married. He is a Buddhist from another country (which I won’t mention here). We plan to live there together, focusing on being good people without following any religion.
However to get a proper visa there, we have to show proof that we’re married. In other words, I need to get the Malaysian marriage certificate.
As you know, the law here won’t allow or recognize civil marriage for muslims, and that a muslim can only marry other muslims. Normally, a non-muslim would convert to islam if they want to marry another muslim.
Just so you know, I don’t plan on forcing him to convert just so we can get married. It’s immoral, and would just lead to other problems in the future.
Therefore, I would like to know how to get the marriage certificate in Malaysia without having a muslim marriage. Can you tell me the details? I think I’ve read about that here somewhere…but it wasn’t detailed enough…
Hi scc, would advice you to research the marriage laws of your bf’s country. A lot of non-Muslim countries allow for interfaith marriages without conversion. Most of the criteria is just filling up paperwork and be in the country for X days before the marriage. So, if the laws permit, just get married there and register your marriage there. But do note that you will not be able to register your marriage in Malaysia at all. This will have its own set of implications (e.g. both of you will not be able to settle in Malaysia, and if you have children, they might not qualify to be Malaysian, etc). Good luck and all the best!
hey.
m a muslim guy
n i want to convert myself into christian.
coz i watn merry with someone christian girl.
Akhil,
It is not a good idea to convert to a new faith just because you love someone. If you really want to convert to Christianity, read the Bible, Koran, talk to imams and priest and also your parents. Take a year or two to make fully informed decision. Tell us what you like about Christianity that you do not find it in Islam? Let us know which country are you from?
this is a public palace
so i could’nt share evrything just now.
i decided that i”ll convert i”ll convert
If u dont mind cn u tel me the way to convert?? Are u a malaysian?
Roxy,
Do you want to convert to Christianity in Malaysia? Talk to your local church for legality. We believe conversion out of Islam is considered apostasy and punishable by… (death)?
Admin in malaysia really can convert if i try to tal with local church??if i settle at overseas how long is the duration to get the citizen??
We are not trying to be difficult but you have to find facts and also consider all your other options for a life partner. Talk to a local church but we believe it will be very hard for a Muslim to convert out of Islam, especially in Malaysia. Further, first you have to find out if other country is willing to let you come in and give you permission to work. Yes, citizenship in any other country will be hard and a long road to achieve that. Best wishes.
Islam do not allow marriage of Muslim girl with a Christian boy, Read Quran chapter 2, verse 221
mac made a very valid point, now you have to decide if you are a Muslim or not?