Prateek says…. November 6, 2011 at 3:08 am
Hey guys and girls,
I am a Hindu and in a relationship with an Islamic girl, we both love each other and can go to any extent to live with each other…
We both don’t have any problem with each other’s faiths, she will continue her faith as she desires and I completely support her, even my family members are welcoming…
so what I wanna ask is that is there any problem in this or anything wrong in this??
Thanks in advance
Admin replied…. November 11, 2011 at 1:42 am
Prateek (and Ashok),
It must be VERY PAINFUL for young people like you to get trapped into this religious war. Like GURUMAA answered to our question (video), it is the politicians and the priest class who want to keep this conversion business going for their personal gain and vote power. In year 2011, it is unimaginable why one person has to give up their birth religion by force (of love) just to please a Pope or an Imam.
I could see that your Muslim girl friend is genuine and tolerant and I am sure her parents are the same way, but parents may be worrying about clashes with their community and religious leaders. If they sense that you are a weak minded, they will use double force to convert you. Read that is written all over this web site and then argue with your girl friend and her parent why you have to convert. Tell them how they will feel if you ask her and her parents to convert to Hinduism?
If they argue that Hindus have to convert because it is written in Koran, then remind her that dating with an idol worshiper Hindu is also against Koran. She should have thought about Koran before asking you for a date. Now asking for conversion is the worst form of LOVE PROSYLTISM. I am sure they will not ask you to convert.
You are born in FREE INDIA, not under thousand years of foreigner’s rule. Don’t be submissive because someone is irrational. If you convert, mean you are feeding this conversion business and it will go on for 1000 more years. If you feed a shark, it will come back for more food. It is a time for change, and the change should start with you, Ashok and Prateek. You guys are Anna Hazare (who is looking for a change against corruption) of this conversion business. Be a role model for thousands of other young adults like you.
Assure her parents that you will take good care of their daughter and will keep her with respect. I am sure they will consider.
They may ask…..
“how are you planning to get married?” and
“what will be the religion of children?”
……so what will you answer?
Prateek added…. December 4, 2011 at 2:55 am
Dear Admin,
Thanks for a nice reply…now let me share some of my ideas on your page, i said I need not convert…u know till last month i never touched upon the topic of religion with her, and when i did you know what reply i got from her,”Prateek since when have you started believing in this and as far as I know we both have just one religion that is love and nothing else…”, am so happy that she thinks like this…
Your first question that how i am planning to get married, answer is that we will marry two times first as per islam and next as per hindus….as far as religion of children is considered they are gonna be a amalgam of both. I must say, because they will grow up with us and ofcourse, we will tell them our story, they will get the best of both worlds and will learn to respect people above everything thing….and now u’ll say that when u get married by nikah then u’ll have to convert i would say that i am much less of a hindu than i am of islam, these petty things dont matter to me, what matters to me is that our bond of love should be as tight as possible….
Now next thing is family, hers and mine, problem for family is created by society; she said to me that she would elope with me but i said no to this…cuz afterall they are her family, i will have to talk it out of the situation and still if nothing works then we might elope….
One more thing that I wish to add….
It seems to me that loving somebody of other religion is more like following a protocol not feelings, i mean i dont understand, why dont people get above this…after all all religions teach and preach about love, affection, care isnt it??, then why people keep falling in the same trap again and again??….and if you really love your girl cant you just skip shahadah…or better still design a whole new system, out of you two, a new religion, all this crops up in the name of god right??
Now I ask what exactly is god, let me answer it. God is something purely immaterial and abstract, we humans want to believe that god is present because it helps us to keep in check, its something we look upto when nothing is in our hands…its like worshipping a supreme power; and do you know why we do this because Human beings a.k.a. Homo sapiens are the most evolved form of any species present here. Just take it this way if someday a much more advanced species comes to our planet, we will start worshipping them….early man used to worship basic elements of nature (wind, air, heat etc)….now I ask why cant we worship love?? because love has everything that you can think of….
(maybe I got a bit too philosophical, but this is just the tip of iceberg that I have in mind).
DISCLAMER: ABOVE ARE PURELY MY ORIGINAL VIEWS, ANY POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE COMMENTS ARE MOST WELCOME BUT PLEASE BE SENSIBLE!! -Prateek.
Read further progress by Prateek here.
Prateek says: April 2, 2014 at 2:45 pm
Hi admin,
My greetings to you, time and again I’ve visited this site to get advice. So here I am again to share the development in my interfaith relationship.
My girlfriend is a muslim and I am a hindu. We both love each other truly, want to be together. Now she is 18 and has completed her class 12 as well, currently I am doing engineering from a reputed institute in India. Recently a alarming thing happened her maternal uncle suggested to get her married asap, given her condition that her family knew about our relationship and they were strictly against it. She is going to start her college this year after 12 results are out, I said to her that she can tell everybody that she is completing her studies and she doesn’t want to marry now, but she says that they wont accept this excuse. Two years of my studies are still left, after that only I would be able to get a job.
I don’t know what to do, please guide me. -Prateek
Prateek says: December 6, 2014 at 12:21 am
Hi Simmi, I will answer each of your questions.
Did you marry her???
Not till now, I am waiting for my college to end and once I start earning, once I would be able to provide for two of us, the yes, sure we will marry.
You guys are happy??
Yes, very much. To tell you the truth we both have pretty much gone beyond the realms of religion, we are more into rational thinking. Religion is a way to find happiness, we both are happy in what we do that is loving each other. -Prateek
Express your views: What would you reply to Prateek? Who is the God (Love, Krishna, Allah, LORD God, (son of god) Jesus, Buddha…?) and which are not qualified as God? Will a practicing Muslim or Christian say that all are God(s)?
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I m a 18 yr old brahmin hindu boy..I love a muslim girl and she also loves me a lot..
It seems hr parents wont accept oir relationship..
I cn gt converted to islam for her sake..wat sud I do?
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=9823
Make hr ask either of hr parents that would they accept a reverted muslim…and if they gv a green signal…….take ur shahada…….and let they holy faith be bestowed on u…
Yuss u are right..
Lemme check dat frst..
I cnt live without her dat is y these things are necessary
Yuss bro u are right..
Lemme check dat frst..
I cnt live without her dat is y these things are necessary..I m only doing this juss to be with u forever
and c cnt let hr family down too..but c loves me like anything
Dear brother tito, you save to convert for sake of islam, not for her sake, if you fake convert to islam for her sake, you will bring misery in your life.
Dear tito, if you love islam and willing to follow it from your heart, then only you should convert to islam, whether you marry her or not.
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=9823
ek ladki had Jo human acchi lagti hai bahut par WO Muslim hai shunni USA ek ladka na propose kiya par phir bhi WO human acchi lagati hai kya karu ab WO chalk jayagi to human bahut bura lagaga usa him khona nhai chata hair par religion beech ma a raha hai life ma pahali bar koi mili par WO bhi na milna ka barabar lagi ek ladki ki wajaha sa USA pata chal gaya ki him USA pasand Marta hai agar WO nhai bolti to him kabhi nhai pata chalna data ab human uski adapt so pad gayi hai samajh nhai at a kya kara
Hi admin,
I am a final year college student.I had got placed in TCS.For the past 3 years I loved a girl who belongs to Muslim religion.I am hindu.I decided to marry her after one year by having a good salary per month.In my home all accept her but she didn’t tell to her parents till now.I can’t live without her and she too.She asking me to become a muslim but i am not interested in that.She also not wish to become hindu girl.Please tell me solution by replying to mail id.I am waiting for your reply.
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=9113
Convert to Islam, simple, you don`t like her worshiping true one unseen god, you have problem with that, you have problem with `submit to god` aka Islam and you want to marry a girl who `submitted to god` aka Muslim. How is it possible?? also you want to destroy her this life and the life here after by converting her to your false man made religion, thatswhy you said she is not interested in converting to Hinduism, it means you tried to convert her to Hinduism, it is obvious that a true Muslim will never convert to Hinduism, so better you forget her
Hari,
You got to know that Muslims are all about convert..convert and convert, nothing else. They will not see any beauty into you, but convert and out to expand the vote power of Islam in India. Read more about mac here. Do you have any interest in being like mac?
Well I have seen you and others beauty like partial blogs on islam, i have seen irrationality of prateek and amritesh, first they talk good , they just wanted others to accept their views but when they where pointed wrong in some topic they showed their true color.
Admin
who been actually converting,
its we just advising them to convert and comes towards the right path
its u people who are forcly converting to the false one
hi am a musim gal hari islam is not about converting only is about believing in one god n his messenger it a beautiful n simple religion not complicated as you see it if u convert she n her parent can accept you
Hi! Prateek,
I really appreciate your views about interfaith marriage. I should say it is down right practical and more human; after all we are humans first and no religion can supreme this. Every couple has the right of attaining their wishes. Must say I am in such situation as well, I am in a relationship with a Muslim Girl and me I am a Hindu. To complicate it we are from different countries too. We started our relationship with no expectations of us being together and never worked on that. As we got closer we did start to think about the chances that we have of being together and they were and still are very faint. Now with this in mind my Girl friend has started to freak out that we might end up separated and says we must depart. As for me I will always keep faith in our love and I hope that all the little things will be alright and she will realise that our love matters more then what people have to say about us. I do hope that one day we shall overcome all the hurdles and make our wish come true.
P.S. I felt very overwhelmed after reading your thoughts, if only they were more people who would believe and share our thoughts. Humanity could over rule all the religions.
Thank You.
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=9016
admin says:
December 18, 2014 at 7:40 am
Laws are clear cut, every one know it. What an individual does is very unpredictable, for example what happened recently in Peshawar School. There is one Islam but different people will interpret it different ways.
mac, explain “as per Hinduism you are born sinful”.
SAME WAY QURAN CLEARLY TELLS MUSLIM MEN TO STICK WITH ONE WIFE, “What an individual does is very unpredictable” – SAME GOES FOR POLYGAMY
GITA CH-9 VERSE 32 CLEARLY SAYS WOMEN ARE BORN FROM SINFUL WOMBS,WOMEN ARE SINFUL.
“QURAN CLEARLY TELLS MUSLIM MEN TO STICK WITH ONE WIFE…. POLYGAMY”, then why are you defending to keep polygamy in India?
Are you proudly defending polygamy in your college to your lady friends?
Is any one in your family following polygamy?
admin says:
December 12, 2014 at 6:55 am
Can we get back to the original question, “should (India) ban polygamy (and talaak)?”
Should India ban facebook,twitter
Readers,
mac wishes to ban Facebook and Twitter but justifying POLYGAMY and TALAAK. Now you judge his mentality and ideology.
Admin, i think idol worship has also blocked your thinking also, i gave the example of Facebook,twitter that they are being hugely misused , does that mean we should ban Facebook -answer is NO, because Facebook has many advantages, we should punish the culprit who misused it, same way, polygamy permission is not the issue, some men misuse it,we should stop these man from misusing polygamy laws , not the ban on polygamy……
Banning polygamy has not solved the problems in Hindu society, Hindu men are more polygamous than Muslim men and as polygamy is not permissible so the husband either divorce his first wife though first wife wants to stay with him or he keep his wife in miserable condition.
Hindu girls,
If you are dating a Muslim boy, you should know that the Muslim husband after Nikaah may use the polygamy law to stack additional 3 young girls next to you someday. If you want an insurance from such possibility, just marry by the Special Marriage Act 1954. After such marriage, even your Muslim husband CANNOT marry a second wife and CANNOT give you quick tripple-Talaak divorce. Look here, mac is vehemently defending polygamy, and likewise, probably your lover too!
Hindu girl if you are marrying a Muslim boy be certain that your husband can never take another wife without asking you but your Hindu husband can secretly keep more wives, further your husband can cheat you, he can enjoy nights with another girl but your Muslim husband won`t do it coz it is grave sin in Islam , further as per Hinduism you are born sinful but in Islam you are born just as sinless as any man.
Laws are clear cut, every one know it. What an individual does is very unpredictable, for example what happened recently in Peshawar School. There is one Islam but different people will interpret it different ways.
mac, explain “as per Hinduism you are born sinful”.
You may point us to Gita 9.32 but read the explanation here.
admin says:
December 12, 2014 at 6:55 am
Can we get back to the original question, “should (India) ban polygamy (and talaak)?”
I think i answered you, tell me why India should ban it, i mean fb caused lot of harms, it was used as a tool to rape girls, should India ban fb, did ICC ban bouncer after Phillip Huges incident
Dear Admin,
Yes, you are right we both have faced our share of macs here and are ready to face them in future as well.
I have told about her to my parents and they are supportive of it.
At her place, when they came to know about this some 2 years back, they tries to pull us apart, since then we both haven’t let them know about our relationship; I am waiting for my studies to get over and getting a good job.
Prateek,
For a Muslim, there is so much guilt feelings installed into them for going against what is written in the book. Even she marries you, she will be install guilt feelings that in AFTER life, Allah will publish her. For Muslim parents, there is so much pressure from their community to follow rules and regulations. For all these reasons, for a common person, it is very hard to go against Islam, even one wishes to.
Yes, celebrities like SRK and Kareena could get around, but not a common person. In your case, you will have success only if after marriage, you both move far away from both sets of parents. We wish you good luck!
And what about beef eating, will Hindu family allow this, survey says that Hindus are prejudice against Muslim, Hindus don`t give their daughters with Muslim, but not for Hindu celebrities like Dr,subramanium swami, VHP leader Ashok Sanghol, Indian police after their years of experience found that its Hindus who create problems.
Again, i am telling to every Muslim girls read books on rationalism,logic and reason and find out who you are being fooled by your Hindu bf, he will say he is rational but will follow his religion , murti puja, staying away frmm beef eating but will tell me that there is NO Janna, etc, so don`t be a fool, just because you are a Muslim girl doesn’t mean you are a fool, you are human beings no one has right to fool you
All Muslim girls who are in love with pseudo rational romeo like prateek must read all comments, this pseudo liberal, pseudo rational people even don`t know what rationalism,liberalism means, they will not allow you to celebrate eid-ul-azha with your family in their home, so you have to compromise with your main festival, is that worth being a Muslim girl!! think, don`t get fooled, argue with your lover, read books on rationalism, topics on rationalism are available in internet, just Google it, thats all I have to say, see this guy prateek didn`t answer whether he will go against his parents to arrange your main festival but your Hindu bf will brainwash you to go against your parents.
We agree to mac that there are clear difference between religions and practices. Sometimes, practices and beliefs will be conflicting and difficult to find balance between two. For example, Muslim will want to kill an animal in home for their Eid festival that a Hindu family may find it too violent act. The same way the Hindu family may expect the Muslim son or daughter-in-law to be a part of Diwali pooja that a Muslim will consider it idol-worship and against Islam.
We are not hear to say who is right or wrong, but youths in love have to realize the reality of life. You may like it or not, but we hope this web site will prepare you to face reality of life. If you cannot face opposing views from strangers here, how will you answer back to your in-laws after your marriage?
In Prateek’s case, he has thought through many issues and has good explaining capabilities. Further, he will be financially independent and thus will have capability to do that is rational and not under pressure from parents and communities. These points help. We wish him the best.
But he didn`y say whether he will allow her wife to sacrifice cow in his home and have meals in their dinner room with her wife`s family and of-course with beef. What he does away frm home is different thing, I am saying equality in home, and admin what about brainwash portion, you tell me if X is a mixed person and you don`t knw nothing abt X and if u ask me to tell you about X and if i say all the bad things of X leaving good side aside, isn`t it a brainwashing ??? rational view is painting complete pic, not half truth, i know rationality gets sentiment of manu people, but i don`t care, all i care is truth,rationalism,logic and reason and facts
What is “truth,rationalism,logic and reason and facts” in polygamy, talaak, the Judgment Day theory…. in Islam? Interfaith marriages are not for those who are not willing to compromise, it is give some and take some. Guy like you should never consider marrying a non-Muslim, unless the objective is love-Jihad and love-proselytism!
Admin, judgement theory comes under the category of evidence, as there is no evidence of judgment day , there is also no evidence that judgment day doesn`t exist …
where as my concern is about “truth,rationalism,logic and reason and facts”, so your first rebuttal is wrong…
now coming to truth, i care about truth, in this site i see so many lies being posted almost everyday,even you know it that the thing the explicitly write about Islam are not Islamic
i explained earlier what is rationalism, even i gave links, i read books on rationalism, and telling one side of a story is not characteristic of a rational person, social scientist tell us that people are in general irrational, though they think themselves as most irrational, if i was here to bully Hindu girls i wouldn`t have given t advice to Hindu girls to think about their parents side…in case of Priyanka or another Hindu girl who was with Bangladeshi Muslim girl, its only Hindus who forced me to comment against Hinduism..
And if you apply facts and reason, you will find Muslims are in safe position in terms of polygamy,talaq, at least Islam gave right to divorce the one whom you don`t comfortable with, talaq is bad but divorce is all right, jihad is bad but struggle is all right, these are prejudice mindset against Muslims,
facts shows that Hindus are more polygamous, facts shows that Muslims have least divorce rate
Why you said talaak is bad?
Are you proud of polygamy in Islam as “truth,rationalism,logic and reason and facts”?
If Indian government decides to remove talaak and polygamy laws today, will all Muslims be happy and support it?
prateeek
Your next question is that whether I would let my muslim wife celebrate Id-Ul-Azha at our place or not, I would definitely tell her my views on animal killing, I would explain her that what sort of psychological impact such sacrifices have on kids. I would tell her different ways in which the purpose can be fulfilled, maybe a public sacrifice, so that less animals are slaughtered.
———-yaaaa, now i got u, u will brain wash her, bt do u knw what, when u slap a mosquito, it is also animal killing, isn`t it my bro prateek!!!, don`t you play football, don`t you wear leather made goods?? don`t you???? if she says no animal sacrifice is good, we can consume healthy nutricious food,,also this eid is celebrated to distribute meat among poors , what u say???? if she says vegetarians are threat to environment, then????? then fight,,,thatswhy i asked this question, “may be public sacrifice”, i am not talking here about “may be”, i am talking abt “if’,
Okay, i got it, there will be no equality in marriage, only male dominance that i am right, you are wrong.
—————————————————————
“Next about my parents, they have developed there own school of thought, yes you are right, they will object to it. But, then its there opinion. What me and my wife do its our business. Also, I would be living away from my parents place due to job, so that won’t be an issue.”
why it is their opinion, why not rationalism here, u r ready to brain wash ur wife bt incase of parents , its there opinion, i salute u for ur dual standard of thinking , evey muslim girl who is planning to marry a humanist,rational,liberal hindu boy must read this bocoz after marriage u will be force somehow to change ur beilef where as ur husband will pass way by saying, wo, u knw what, its my parents opinion…..
You may be living far away from parents, but there is a high chance that during festive season u will be near ur parents coz in in festive days u get break from ur job
there is no scietific proven fact that animal sacrifice has psychological impact on kids
And about that wikipedia link, it shows statistics of 2009-10 and now its 2014, 1 month away frm 2015, lets say 2015.. now you please read this latest report on beef.. Beef exports up 44% in 4 years, India is top seller
My main argument was that in india it is not a difficult task at all to have a plate of beef.
prateeek
Your next question is that whether I would let my muslim wife celebrate Id-Ul-Azha at our place or not, I would definitely tell her my views on animal killing, I would explain her that what sort of psychological impact such sacrifices have on kids. I would tell her different ways in which the purpose can be fulfilled, maybe a public sacrifice, so that less animals are slaughtered.
———-yaaaa, now i got u, u will brain wash her, bt do u knw what, when u slap a mosquito, it is also animal killing, isn`t it my bro prateek!!!, don`t you play football, don`t you wear leather made goods?? don`t you???? if she says no animal sacrifice is good, we can consume healthy nutricious food,,also this eid is celebrated to distribute meat among poors , what u say???? if she says vegetarians are threat to environment, then????? then fight,,,thatswhy i asked this question, “may be public sacrifice”, i am not talking here about “may be”, i am talking abt “if’,
Okay, i got it, there will be no equality in marriage, only male dominance that i am right, you are wrong.
brain wash….Do you even know what you are talking about?? Seriously, you sound like a brain washed person. Public sacrifice was just an option, I think you didn’t get my point. I am saying that these are just my opinions, I will always tell her my views on things. I said that such a sacrifice should not be made infront of kids, next such sacrifices shouldn’t be made in the name of god as well.
Next you said, that if she confronts me, then fight?? Seriously, you think my love and my bond with her is so weak that we’ll fight over such petty issues.
Where is the male dominance you are talking about?
I am not even fighting for any religion here. If you read my earlier posts you will come to know what I mean.
—————————————————————
“Next about my parents, they have developed there own school of thought, yes you are right, they will object to it. But, then its there opinion. What me and my wife do its our business. Also, I would be living away from my parents place due to job, so that won’t be an issue.”
why it is their opinion, why not rationalism here, u r ready to brain wash ur wife bt incase of parents , its there opinion, i salute u for ur dual standard of thinking , evey muslim girl who is planning to marry a humanist,rational,liberal hindu boy must read this bocoz after marriage u will be force somehow to change ur beilef where as ur husband will pass way by saying, wo, u knw what, its my parents opinion…..
You may be living far away from parents, but there is a high chance that during festive season u will be near ur parents coz in in festive days u get break from ur job
My aim to marry my gf is to live happily with her, care for her and love her for the lifetime. I want to grow old with her. It isn’t about some crusade, or hindu/muslim. You are developing your own opinions here, please don’t do that.
Again I am saying please go through the whole thing, before forming any opinions about me.
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there is no scietific proven fact that animal sacrifice has psychological impact on kids
Seriously, do you play PC games?? It has ratings, if a game has excess of violence, gore and blood, its not suitable for minors. Check your facts first.
——————————————–
And about that wikipedia link, it shows statistics of 2009-10 and now its 2014, 1 month away frm 2015, lets say 2015.. now you please read this latest report on beef.. Beef exports up 44% in 4 years, India is top seller
My main argument was that in india it is not a difficult task at all to have a plate of beef.
But somehow I didn’t get the chance to taste, this is the truth.
Mac, I think you have a problem in understanding english clearly. You are not getting what I mean to say.
You sound like a horse, which has its eyes covered and it can see only in one direction, its like a tunnel vision. You really need to widen your horizons, get over religion, be a more practical person.
Mac, I will post a very detailed scenario tonight. Right now I have some work to do.
Stay tuned.
Please consider using your real name rather than an alias.
admin says:
December 6, 2014 at 1:57 pm
Great point, “My faith is a much higher thing”.
Allah (if there) is the creator of this sun, stars, and whole universe. Why Allah has to be confined to some book and specific person? Mac is certainly frozen in some books, and we have difficulty making him think out of the box. Prateek, please continue discussion with mac.
but you didn`t have problem with amritesh calling me “mother fucker”, your friends human,chandosmani,raesha sings etc who called me kutte,rape product, etc etc. ID my book keeps me from calling others this type of slang then i am happy to think within my book, also how many times they lied, you know it, even you also lied many times gave false information, if my book prevents me from doing these type of things then i am happy to be a man of book.
Hi Prateek,
I want I want to know what happen next,did you marry her??
If yes then are you happy with her??
Do you have kids??
Please reply
Check reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=866&cpage=1#comment-340822
Simmi,
Yes, we love Prateek’s thought process, very nobel.
Are you in love relationship with a Muslim?
and please no hate comment, here i see only hate comments, i want a good advise
hi prateekme here in same situation, my name is akash, my girlfriend is muslim,i am computer engineer and working,she is also computer engineer , she loves me and i love her too, but parents are the problem, my parents are ready to accept her as a muslim but her parents are not ready to accept me as hindu, she says her parrents will only allow our marriage if i convert to muslim religion, i don`t know much about muslim religion, all i want is our marriage without any problem and without hurting anyones feelings, i want blessings from all side, but she is only telling me that she can marry me only if i convert to muslim which is impossible,now what to do, she is also not ready to leave muslim which i said ok but only problem is from her side
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=8853
Hi Prateek,
Now we have been chatting almost 3 years. We are very impressed by your maturity and critical thinking power. You certainly have capacity to be a national leader, we wish you the best.
Now to your lover relationship. Young ages and not being financially independent are your two enemies; along with other enemies like two sets of parents and two sets of communities. Your top priority should be to complete your education and be financially independent. She should resist getting married at early age and continue her college education.
She is now 18 and thus you both could go marry by the Special Marriage Act. No one could stop you from doing so. However, it is easy to get married and VERY difficult to manage a married life. For this reason, we will not recommend you to get married now. Wait for 2-3 more years, get a good job and if she is still available, get married.
dear admin…i hav been reading blogs on this site..my condition is similar to Prateek’s but it is worst in my case. i am a hindu and i met her in std 8 . now v both r 18 .She raises the same quetion”will u convert for me?” yes i love her and i can go to any extent..buy y its only me who should sacrifice? doesnt she love me? shouldnt she sacrifice equally….? well she is also afraid of society and all. i respect every religion n for me love and humanity is above everything and dont respect any reglion WHICH REGARDS WOMEN “WEAK” open your mind habibi matromonials n see the truth. right to education was banned for a female in muslim religion but today it is codemned coz it is wrong. no god has written any bible/geeta/ quaran pr watever…its we the human beings who has divided ourselves among nations,state,religions and all.now m in 12 n she is also in 12 and we r afraid to loose eachother one day becoz of all illogical things.i need help..
Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=8498
yaaar meri b same problm hai my name is vikas Siddharth n the girl I love is zeba ali nd now I can do any thing for her
Hey Vikas,
Sorry for not replying earlier.
Can you describe the events and circumstances. I would be more than happy to guide you.
Hi Interfaith Lovers/Couples !
“Happy Diwali” to you & your Family.God Bless All of you Happy & Prosperous Life.
Hi Everyone,
Best Wishes with Prateek & Karan
As My Search have got me here…….!!
Yes, Same Situation
Me.. Hindu My (Muslim) Half Wife Most Probably (all set) to get Married Next Year.
All Spoken – with My Parents & Her Parents too.
You Can Say My Luck Supported Me & My sacrifices also should Result….
Friend, I would Like to Share my love … life so far…..!! Never Know It will Work….!!
In Short – I Had Left Her for 3 months to test her & My Love Too.
She Loves Me Alot & was always fighting to met me, talk to me… and even she left her food & College for a month (with is I Got to Know Her Love & Her Support will always be with me till I Die)* & The Plus Point Her Mom Got an Idea about Our Love & She was the One who Contacted Me & Told Me that She Have Left her Food & Wanted to Meet Me)
That Day My First Entry In Her House & Heart – I set next to Her, Feed Her & Spoke with Her Mother & Elder Sister above our relationship & Cleared The Point At That Time I Will Not Convert myself.
Will My Family Members Turn – which I Thought I Will Have Full Support From My Dad But will I Got Support from My Sisters, Uncle & Aunty they Liked Her But the Problem was the Caste – They Also Wanted to Get Her Converted – And Had the View that She Should Not Lose Her Identity.
My Elder Sister & Best Friend Made Me Understand That I Our Castes Girl Life Changes After Marriage – She Lives for Her Husband & Children Only
This will also Help Your Children & Her Too as she will not be accepted by her Community. So, for the Bright Future as she will stay with my Parents I Made Her Understand ” I Will Not Have Any Problem with Her Religion & Practices But My Parent May.
Will Its Totally Wrong When Hindu Girl Love Muslim Boy – Girl Have to Get Converted Just Bcoz She Have to Stay with that atmosphere & Society. Same way like we have to Adjust & Live In Different Atmosphere & Climate – Like In Winter Season – we have to Change our Life Style No One will Carry Umbrella.
It Took Time to make her understand and accept – By the Time I Visited Many a time – Mahim, Haji Ali & Mumbai Central Dargah Too.
Will I made a Point To Visit Temple Places Too. To Make Us Understand & Bring us Close to Each other.
I Always want to Say Her – What Ever I Am Doing Is Not For Me Or My Society But For Our Bright Future.
For Her – I Left My Place, My Home & My Parents for almost 2 Yrs.
Will If we Think In Their way – We Our Doing a Mistake And as per parents they will try their best to Make us Explain in their way and this will test My Love & Care For My Wife.
Will I was always In Touch & Made a Point To Be There In When they Need their Elder Son.
After 1 Yrs – 11 Months Father & Mother Called Me Back – But Terms & Condition Apply – My Parents Liked Her but have a question – will they able to adjust with each other …. Time will Change It for a Good Cause.
—- Last But — Time is Cause & Medicine —
It’s not uncommon that kids do not always grow up with the religious fervor of their parents, but when you do cross the line to love someone who is Muslim as you stated she is. In Islam there is no dating period. And in Islam the Muslim women is only to marry a Muslim. That means unless you are willing to convert to Islam- you are basically saying that she is not worth it. Any Islamic society would alienate her because her actions are that of not of a good Muslim, if not kill her (depending on which country she lives in.) If she married you regardless her religion tells her what specifically she can and cannot do, then you both are playing with fire. I would like to know what part of Islam does she identify with? In Islam you cannot pick and choose what you will practice and not practice like she is doing. It’s all or striving to be good.
Women are “weak” in Islam meaning that they think with their hearts. As you already know it hurts so much to think with your heart, sometimes you need older people to say, “Hey you are making a big mistake.” We hope that our adult children who think about marriage will be mature and think with their minds but as you can see you too think with your heart and this is not a good recipe for a leader of a home.
You can marry her as a Hindu and there will be upset. Or you can convert to Islam and marry her and there will be upset because you parents are not Muslim and may not like for you to embrace Islam. And if you are at all concerned with them then you will hesitate to hurt them way before you will hesitate to hurt your GF.
To be honest with you anyone who crosses that line and expects bliss is foolish. Do you feel its hard? If not you will really feel it’s hard very soon.
Can you elaborate more on your statement?…”Any Islamic society would alienate her because her actions are that of not of a good Muslim, if not kill her (depending on which country she lives in.)”
There are many Muslim girls they are in relationship with Hindus (read many blogs on this site). Do you recommend that the Islamic society should “kill her?”
In Islam when a girl has premarital sex this is very bad. In some countries, not sure if in “India”, the girl if found having premarital sex OR committing adultery will be stoned to death. If this isn’t the case for the laws in India, the family may do what is called, “Honor killing” meaning for the sake of the honor of the family they kill the daughter who committed such acts. And this happens even in non-Islamic countries.
In America we grow up with we do not care what others think, but in Islam you care about how you are viewed from the Islamic society and any girl or guy who thinks they can do as they like regardless of what others think will be caught in web of lies and heartbreak.
It should also be mentioned that Honor Killing is forbidden in Islam. And to be tried in court for Adultery isn’t easy in Islam as one would think. If she becomes pregnant then this is obvious, but it is not for the parents to judge and try her for her acts, it is for the courts to decide…
Can you clarify your statement…”If she becomes pregnant then this is obvious,…” …what is obvious?
Do you mean parents or society or country’s court or Islamic court should “kill her?”
What is your view on your statement, “for the sake of the honor of the family they kill the daughter.” Do you think “honor of family” has a higher priority over the daughter’s choice? Do you think parents or court should approve “kill her” for the sake of “honor of family?”
If a Hindu-Muslim relationship/dating results in the Muslim girl getting pregnant, what would you recommend for the Muslim girl?
If a Hindu-Muslim relationship/dating results in the Hindu girl getting pregnant, what would you recommend for the Muslim boy?
First please express YOUR personal view, not what others will do or could do or being done.
What would Koran recommend about this subject? Can you quote some verses here to explain?
Hey Hi To prateek and Admin.
See i am suffering from the same situation as Prateek. I am not be able to figure it out what step should i take now.. My girl is afraid only of community. She says” Okey if we’ll get married , do you think Community people will accept my family ?” Just suggest me some advice.. I desperately need a advice, coz its the time to do or die..and One more thing for sure i’ll not have shahdah, i dnt have any problem to believe in god, but the point raised over here is I can’t let any further things happen to my family like all ceremony and Names of children etc.
Hey admin and Prateek you Please advice me something, Request you to kindly Reply at earliest.
And prateek do share your experience what your girl’s parents responded when you approached them??
I m waiting for reply of you both.
Hi Karan,
Understand reality of life and stop suffering. Nothing is going to happen overnight. Take your time to make a right decision, what ever that is.
The objective for both of you should be – a happy and long lasting Hindu-Muslim married life. Your “love” and sex hormones running in your blood stream will not last more than 6 months into your married life, but a true respect for each other and compatibility for each other will drive your married life forever. So start understanding each other rationally rather than being blinded under love.
Now, your girl friend is asking you…“do you think (my) Community people will accept my family?“ If your goal is to make her community happy, you will have to follow all that Sharmila Tagore did. You will have to convert, have a sunat-circumcision now, change your name, forget about your parents and your community, have kids with Muslim names, teach your kids from the Koran and you be a true Muslim. If you decide to go for this path, make sure you are not going to be like Hinu, Vikas, Roma, Dee, Madiha’s mom, etc who later realize their mistake and changed their mind. So take your time to decide what do you want to do and stick with it for your life.
Ask her if she is willing to do some sacrifices and be like Seema, Salman and Shah Rukh Khan. Sit down with her and read “Koran on Hindus?” and try to learn what she has learned in her life. Go visit her Mosque and learn more on Islam. Also invite her to your temple and teach her about Hinduism. Please get back to us in 30 days and let us know what you have learned from her.
Best would be to find a middle ground (no BBS) and enjoy your interfaith marriage with EQUALITY.
Hey Karan,
First of all I want to tell you that this is not suffering, its the test of your love; I want to know that is your family welcoming for her??
Explain to her parents that their daughter’s all happiness lies with you…and in this your GF will need to convince her parents, its difficult I know but she will have to declare her love for you outright. Next thing I wanna know is about her family, how staunch they are regarding Islam, members…alot depends on a lot of things(circumstances), sometimes hardest of beliefs are broken just due to circumstances….you will come to know more about this as I update my situation….see, I say that what you both should care is your love for each other, and do everything to make it possible….if you have to walk on fire then walk….and if you wanna know the reality, observe circumstances for both of you. Update me asap.
Hey Hi Prateek..
Thanks a lott for your Advice.. But i guess its too late now..
Her Marriage is fixed with some one in her community.
So Now I won’t trouble any more in her Life.. and Just let all that happened. Thanks Anyways..
Wish you all the very best for your love
Do not be so upset, Karan.
It is good thing that you are trying to put all this behind and move on.
It will not be easy. It will be tough. But it is this situation that will tell what you are, really. A true character is which that guides you in difficult situations.
So, think and act. Try to be in some good company among your friends. That will make it easy for you to overcome this moment of truth.
I am sure that you are not blaming her, which is an admirable quality from you. This itself tells a lot about your excellent character.
God knows what she has been threatened with. God knows what she went through. But the truth is Islam prohibits its women from marrying Non-Muslim.
When Muslims are in majority, the law says that Islamic state should put to death those Non-Muslims who marry Muslim women.
And when in minority, Islam preaches that Muslim parents kill such daughters.
It does not mean that patents can not hire goons to murder the one who is trying to marry their daughter.
Islam is totalitarian and completely supremacist.
I am sure you will come fine through this.
Islamic society will not accept Muslims who do as they wish regardless of the rules set in place.
It’s like you have kids who you want to be well behaved and you do not want your kids messing with the kids whose parents let their kids do anything.
In Islam a Muslim woman is only to marry a Muslim man. Unless you were planning to convert to Islam, there would be no chance for life to resume in a happy mode as you have it now.
i strongly oppose ur opninion n views…ur religion n god get happiness and satisfaction separating those who love? kill those who love..and appreciates killing? regards women “weak” …tell ur preacher that is nothing stronger than a women…by saying all those nonsense ur insulting ur mother from whose womb u r born…there is nothing above love and humanity. open ur eyes…let every one live freely and happily..instead of frightening them by any illogical means….i dont understand such notions of regarding women WEAK , i heard muslim girls r not allowed to get educated also?
armitesh, have learned anyting other than lying
There is no conversion in hinduism.if you love it then you are a hindu.hinduism is the best religion for female.hinduism teaches wife is the ardhangini (half body of husband)
To be honest if she embraced Hindu faith, she would be killed. What they call “Honor killing.”
Are you proud of this “honor killing” practice? Do you really mean this?
Are you a male or female?
Honor Killing is a result of what some families resort to as a means to maintain honor for their family. That doesn’t mean I subscribe to this means, its like saying, “Crime is the highest in Mississippi.” That doesn’t mean I am proud of the crime or that I support the crime..
It should also be mentioned that Honor Killing is forbidden in Islam. And to be tried in court for Adultery isn’t easy in Islam as one would think. If she becomes pregnant then this is obvious, but it is not for the parents to judge and try her for her acts, it is for the courts to decide…
Islam is religion where girl’s doesn’t have independence.
Ask her to convert to hindu as she is 18 .years now you and your friend can marry in court .
Teach Hinduism is superior than other religion where all are getting same independence
Mantu ISLAM gave true freedom,respect to women but it may go against your evil thoughts who idolises women as SEX OBJECT, make money by putting mothers,sisters,daughters on ramp, no islam doesn`t permits that so islam is against women, if hinduism is so good for women then why hinduism PERMITS RAPE, why hinduism has no punishment for rapist where islam gives death punishment to a rapist
yeeah that is a great story..but u know i have also same case like u..but my family u know it, is too much religious and they never drink a cut of tea in any muslim house ..so how can a girl who is muslim will be accepted by my family and also our society does not have any love case of diff. religion so marrying her means getting thrown out from family, society and all ur relative including friends. I don’t have any kind of solution for this problem except regretting. What i mean to say is that u r a very lucky man also both of u r so lucky that ur family is so supportive ..u must be happy for this reason. I wish u best of luck..and if u have any solution for me than plz give me a reply..
still you are a hindu ( kafir ) marry her and convert to islam this is better for you.
This is from the Islamic stand point. In Islam the Muslim woman can only marry the Muslim man period. Thus Muslim women never would consider getting herself involved in a relationship where she would set herself up for problems if she was indeed a “Muslim.” Many may call themselves Muslims but a true Muslim is one who follows the five pillars of Islam. Doing your own thing as you like without regards to your religion says that in Islam you are a “Kafr” meaning an unbeliever.
For you, there is no problems but for her family, her society ,her religion there would and should be a firestorm brewing.
In Islam there is no such thing as live in situation prior to marriage. No mingling of the sexes, no boyfriend/girlfriend. As you can probably feel that she is not a good Muslim by Islamic standards. That may not matter to you, but I think you are smart to ask this question because you know Muslims are more serious that she plays herself to be.
You could embrace Islam but you should only do so when you feel that Islam is the right religion not because you want to make her happy.
Dear,
I work as a researcher for Swedish Educational Broadcasting Company, UR, which is one of the Public service companies of Sweden. We are making a TV-series with four programs about ethics and moral from a religious perspective, and the target group is pupils in High school here in Sweden. Our reporter/producer Erik Sandström is travelling the world to meet people with different religions and he is coming to Kolkata, India in about a week.
I wonder if you would like to participate or help me finding a young couple who are from different religions and has a hard time because of this? We would like to interview them, film and tell their story, and we will be discreet and understand that this is a delicate matter.
Please get back to me.
All my best regards
Emelie Jönsson
emelie.jonsson@ur.se
Hey Admin,
Thanks for your nice compliments but at some point you got me wrong, am not going for Shahdah, I never say I will, now you will say that then nikah is not possible, i would say lets skip shahdah and do all other stuff, if thats not nikaah lets call it something else…who cares!!!…see in court marriage you sign papers, then also you call it marriage; when you marry with rituals then you call it marriage, there is no clause in Indian Penal Code that restricts people of different religions to marry, come on guys we live in a secular country; ever read a NCERT book there is a preamble printed there….you should have faith, you should believe that yes, there is some supreme power that controls everything, thats what we call god….let me say Ramayana was just a novel written by Tulsidas; Koran was personal diary of prophet saheb….so how come we all get blindfolded…its love that you should spread and worship, not rigid protocols…get me???
Did you marry her???
You guys are happy??
Do you have kids??
Plzzz reply
Hi Simmi,
I will answer each of your questions.
Did you marry her???
Not till now, I am waiting for my college to end and once I start earning, once I would be able to provide for two of us, the yes, sure we will marry.
You guys are happy??
Yes, very much. To tell you the truth we both have pretty much gone beyond the realms of religion, we are more into rational thinking. Religion is a way to find happiness, we both are happy in what we do that is loving each other.
Do you have kids??
No.
I guess I have answered your questions. If you wish to know more, you can leave a comment. Also, I would love to help you. If you are in a interfaith relation and want to research.
Thanks.
so now prateek is fine with eating cow meat with her gf
Dear Mac,
I have been following you on this site.
You really need to improve your grammar.
Next thing is that as far as meat is considered I have eaten many, cow’s meat I haven’t tried. Maybe, someday if I get the chance I will try it and if I like it, I will continue eating it. One more thing, if you would have read my views on this site, you’d have known by now that petty things like what I eat, what I wear they don’t depend on my faith. My faith is a much higher thing, its beyond your understanding.
Thanks.
Great point, “My faith is a much higher thing”.
Allah (if there) is the creator of this sun, stars, and whole universe. Why Allah has to be confined to some book and specific person? Mac is certainly frozen in some books, and we have difficulty making him think out of the box. Prateek, please continue discussion with mac.
wooo, so your diet is independent from your faith and still u haven`t had experinece of beef, great joke, india is the largest producer of beef, so don`t give me excuse that u didn`t that excuse. Why u r lying here, why don`t u don`t u have guts to say that i don`t eat beef coz its considered as holy shit in my faith, okay lemme ask u in this way, will u allow ur wife to celebrate eid ul azha in your home and invite your in laws to come and celebate id ul azha in ur home, if your parents express objection(actually they will object) will you say NO to your parents and allow rationalism,equality to rule your family or will you say to your wife that my parents don`t agree coz cow is our god(lol)
I expect an honest answer from you
And about english grammer,I accept the fact that i m not good at english, thanks bro for pointing out , i m not good at english, i will try to improve it.
Dear Mac,
First of all I don’t know about the statistics that India is the largest producer of Beef,
Please check this link out Wikipedia on Beef
I want you to look at two topics, 1st Religious prohibitions, 2nd World Producers.
About eating it, seriously I haven’t tried it once. I have eaten Mutton(prepared on Id), Chicken, Fishes. Beef, I never got to try. If I get a chance, I will have it for sure. Also, if I like the taste I will continue eating it.
Next, Id ul Azha or Bakri-id is like any other festival to me. I still say that killing an innocent animal for the sake of religion is wrong(Its just my opinion), even in Hinduism such sacrifices are there, such as Pashupati nath temple in Nepal(One of the largest temples of Hindus), there Goats are slaughtered round the year, I seriously condemn that, its wrong.
Your next question is that whether I would let my muslim wife celebrate Id-Ul-Azha at our place or not, I would definitely tell her my views on animal killing, I would explain her that what sort of psychological impact such sacrifices have on kids. I would tell her different ways in which the purpose can be fulfilled, maybe a public sacrifice, so that less animals are slaughtered.
Next about my parents, they have developed there own school of thought, yes you are right, they will object to it. But, then its there opinion. What me and my wife do its our business. Also, I would be living away from my parents place due to job, so that won’t be an issue.
Prateek,
First, you are lots smarter than most people who get into interfaith love relationships. You want to learn all these before hand and make an informed decision. You are an intelligent man…congratulations! Wish all interfaith couple do the same.
Now there is a big fundamental conflict in what you are saying at different times. You told ASHOK that “….don’t start out your life with lie…what example are you going to set for your children…be brave…” and also said above “I need not convert.” And in fact, you are willing to go for Shahadah (irreversible conversion to Islam and taking an oath that there is no God but Allah; you will be given a Muslim name and will have to have circumcision; read Koran) for your Nikaah (Islamic wedding). After that you two Muslims (one born and another just converted) will have a Hindu wedding by a Hindu priest in presence of many of invoked Hindu Gods!!!! Are you starting your life with lies?
Why your Muslim GF will have any problem as far you are going to be a Muslim anyways. However, she deserves credit if she is willing to sit in a Hindu wedding in presence of a large number of her Muslim relatives.
Check with a lawyer if your Muslim-Muslim wedding by a Hindu priest is valid in your country. Also understand that after Shahadah, all Islamic laws apply to you (including funeral rights), your family life and children.
Here, we are not trying to be difficult on you (and other youths) but exposing problems with religious rigid dogma. We fully agree that THE God had not this in mind but it is critical for different religious institutions’ survival that people follow this. By converting you are feeding these sharks (and they will come back for more!!). Later, don’t have a change of mind, like VIKAS. Best wishes.
Hey Admin,
Thanks for your nice compliments but at some point you got me wrong, am not going for Shahdah, I never say I will, now you will say that then nikah is not possible, i would say lets skip shahdah and do all other stuff, if thats not nikaah lets call it something else…who cares!!!…see in court marriage you sign papers, then also you call it marriage; when you marry with rituals then you call it marriage, there is no clause in Indian Penal Code that restricts people of different religions to marry, come on guys we live in a secular country; ever read a NCERT book there is a preamble printed there….you should have faith, you should believe that yes, there is some supreme power that controls everything, thats what we call god….let me say Ramayana was just a novel written by Tulsidas; Koran was personal diary of prophet saheb….so how come we all get blindfolded…its love that you should spread and worship, not rigid protocols…get me???
Prateek,
You are lots smarter than most interfaith couples, congratulations!
Now how much our discussion is idealism verses reality of life? To find facts, go talk to her Muslim family and relative with your plans. Generally, for a Hindu to go to a Muslim family and ask for their daughter but not willing to convert to Islam is like walking on fire (read Sri). Let us know of your experience after you meet her family.
Many times, after marriage there is a change of mind (like Dee’s wife). For this reason, sit down with your GF and read Koran on Hindus?, Can Allah be the Father God, Madiha, Saif and Kareena…., these will help you know who really is she. I hope she is like Shah Rukh Khan, Seema and Salman. Best wishes!
thanks again for the compliments…
I agree our discussion is pointing towards idealism vs reality, but I would say that reality is what we accept and what we dont, by ‘we’ here I mean our inner conscience; what actually changes reality to idealism is the s#!t thrown at us by society, but I say why to listen to them; you can argue that sometime you might need that society, so I would say by that time society is gonna accept you….as far as my Gf is concerned she is damn liberal and she keeps a pic of ‘Sai baba’ with her, she believes in the fact that, “Sabka malik ek!!”, so what else do I need here??…moreover once she is gonna convince, I hope everything is going to be alrite….I can only hope!!
Next, talk to her parents. Later, let us know updates.
Hey Admin,
Sorry for being away for a long time, but I don’t get comment updates in my inbox.
First of all I must say half of my battle is won!!
Earlier, her mom kinda disliked me, she had never talked to me but she did cuz she was misguided by some people from whom she inquired about me…so my first step was to make her talk to me; so one day she comes and talks to me, and says that “You have caused disrespect to my family…” and similar stuff, but I talked to her normally, so somehow I made a good impression on her, she complimented me to my girl, so this acquaintance turns to a good relationship with her; so, one day my girl told her everything outright, and said that she wants to marry me; her mom comes and talks to me the very next day, there I explain her all my thoughts(you can read above), so she agreed to it and now she doesn’t have any problem with me…my next target is her brothers and sisters…
Now, some Islam fundamentalist might say that then they are not true muslims, then I would say who the hell cares??? she understood and accepted our love and thats all we wanted…right??