William says: February 11, 2013 at 8:09 am
I’m a black Muslim man wanting to marry a Pakistani woman but her dad puts culture before Islam, what can i do?
We are in our mid 20′s living in London, UK and working in an electricity company for the last 5 years. I wish would like to marry. We love each other, having sexual relations too at times. Her parents say she would bring shame to the community if she marries a non Muslim. I’m a good guy and she loves me and wants nobody else in her life too and I feel the same. She wants to live an independent life without any restrictions that are commonly imposed on females, like Hizab and proving virginity on the wedding night.
In Islam all races are equal, this is what the prophet (pbuh) taught, but it seems to go out the window when true faith is tested… worship of culture out rules worship of God… culture becomes a separate God in itself.
Why am I a sign of shame? What should I do? -William
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Also read: Islamic Women Today, Inter-race marriages, Hindu-Muslim marriages, Hindu girl, Muslim girl, Hindu boy, Muslim boy, Christian-Muslim marriages, Hymen Repair Surgery,
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You are committing zina, unlawful sex,a major sin. Get married soon as possible. Be a good muslim Allah will make your path easy. 95% of muslims do not pray and follow Prophets sunnah. If you do the two latter , you will develop a great character , which is priceless. If her parents still say no, then they are the losers.
Wait a minute! First you are saying that you are a Muslim but then you are saying that her parents would feel shame if she marries a non-Muslim. So,first of all tell the truth if you really are a Muslim or a non-Muslim.If you’re a non-Muslim then, marriage with non-Muslims is not allowed for Muslim men and women!
Hi sisters,
I am a muslim woman now 35 years,living in Canada. I lost my virginity during my graduation with my non-muslim BF. I could not marry with him due to pressure from my parents and had to use artificial hymen kit very tactfully on the wedding night, full of blood stains on the bed sheet, which was shown very proudly by my inlaws to the neighbourers.
Lateron I could not pull on with my muslim husbiand due to restrictions and divorced him. Now having live in relationship with a Hindu Brahmin boy happily, and soon marry him through court marriage with out conversion. A virginity for muslim female, it is a curse and why the same principle is not applied to the males?
The restoration of Muslim virginity is in demand in Germany. The Muslim women in need of new, unused hymen, are mostly older, 20 to 25-years-old Muslimahs. They come from Turkey, Balkans, Iran and the Arab countries.
The Muslim women call themselves Zeda, Aysegul, Cancun and Samar. They met anonymously on the Internet and discuss the vital issue for them: “I urgently need information on where a Muslim woman can get her hymen sewn restoration; what would it cost – please help me,” writes of them in the lifestyle and health forum. She received many responses within minutes.
On the WWW the Muslim women can share their fears and discuss Muslim issues undisturbed. Only a few could talk about this taboo topic within the family. The loss of virginity in Muslim world is as much disgrace as unwanted pregnancy. The Muslim family honor is equated with the purity of their daughters.
The Berlin’s family planning center receives numerous request for information on Muslim hymen restoration every week. “The demand has increased dramatically,” says Dr. Christiane Tennhardt. The woman are mostly between 20 to 25-years old and came from Turkey, Balkans, Iran and other Arab countries. “Most are not veiled and speak perfect German.”
The parents must be presented with the bloody sheet
Th story is the same: An Iranian woman wants to save her future husband from ‘Infamy’ and ‘disgraced woman.’ The Muslims of Kurdish persuasion present their bloody sheet to the parents after the wedding night.
“Many of the Muslim woman have had sexual intercourse several times, then comes the wedding and the reality catches up with them.”
It has happened that a Muslim girl has been raped by her family and then forced to prove her virginity.
There are cases when the restoration of the Muslim hymen is the only option due to the health concerns of the Muslim woman. The human rights organization, Terre des Femmes, disagrees on the hymenorrhaphie issue.
“The social significance of virginity is often utilized to deny women their sexual freedom and to restrict their lifestyles.”
Dr. Teenhardt has long worked with Muslim women seeking hymen restoration. It usually turns out that the Muslim women know very little about their own bodies and sexuality. “If I tell them that hymen does not necessary guarantee bleeding, or that some Muslim girls are born without a hymen, they’re very surprised.”
The gynecologist teaches the Muslim women how virginity can be faked.
In cases where the Muslim woman is in great distress and afraid of deadly honor violence, the doctor is prepared to perform the outpatient surgery. “We want to prevent mental and physical suffering.” The cost is about 200 euros.
How many thousands of hymen restoration operations are done in Europe is unknown. The demand is huge, shows the offers by plastic surgeons, some charging up to 2100 euros for the procedure.
One advert promises: For only 24.95 Euros (including shipping) you can save your honor.
The tips and addresses are also provided by Internet forums. “My gynecologist operates in outpatient basis and it will cost only 100 euros,” writes a Muslim woman.
Dr, Tennhardt emphasizes that much more important than tip for doctors and cost is to tackle the issue of Muslim woman through societal shift of thinking. The young Muslim women should be encouraged to demand their right to fuck anyone, anytime, anywhere.
My virginity was restored in a delicate operation just last week, and I honestly view it as life-saving surgery,” says Aisha.
“If my husband cannot prove to his family that I am a virgin, I would be hounded, ostracised and sent home in disgrace. My father, who is a devout Muslim, would regard it as the ultimate shame.
“The entire family could be cast out from the friends and society they hold dear, and I honestly believe that one of my fanatically religious cousins or uncles might kill me in revenge, to purge them of my sins. Incredible as it may seem, honour killings are still accepted within our religion.
“Ever since my family arranged this marriage for me, I’ve been terrified that, on my wedding night, my secret would come out. It has only been since my surgery last week that I’ve actually been able to sleep properly. Now, I can look forward to my marriage.”
Reply to Islami girl at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=4409
No need to use artificial methods.
Better look for a sikh guy, who will respect and love you for ever.
Dont worry. Dont loose heart.
You have to pursue the matter with your GF and convince her. You are in UK and if she agrees, no problem to marry there, being both adult and attained age of maturity. For her, she is already in sexual relations with you, and if she ever married to a muslim guy, how will she prove her virginity, unless she goes for hymen repair surgery or use an artificial hymen kit on the wedding night to show blood stains.