3.6: I Chose to Be Baptized when I Was Pregnant

Section 3.6: I Chose to Be Baptized when I Was Pregnant

Bharti says:

I think religion is something that is very personal. In different phases of my life, I have felt different pulls. I chose to be baptized when I was pregnant with my child, to incorporate my husband’s ancestry. However, I refused to let my child be baptized, because I felt I was not in a position to make a commitment for her. Since then, she speaks our language, does puja daily and has brought our way of life back into our home. —Bharti

Bharti added:

Raising interfaith and or multiracial Desi kids is a unique experience. There are not very many such marriages in my community, so advice is rather sparse.

It would be nice to get the perspective of couples who have raised interfaith and multiracial children. I especially want to hear form Indian ladies married to non-Desis. How do you deal with festivals, in-laws, etc? If there are values in the other culture/family that you consider harmful to your child, how do you protect him or her from it?

While nobody has been mean to my face about my marriage or my child, I have heard things through the grapevines. Is there a way to protect your child from hearing this stuff or feeling bad? —Bharti

Bharti added (a month later):

Hay Niti!

This is my personal experience, so it is one of my perspectives:

I got baptized because I felt that my child should be exposed to and have a sense of belonging in both religions. In order to be part of church life and community, my husband and I chose to be baptized. Shortly after our child was born, we were contacted by the church to have our child baptized. We did not feel that we could make that decision for her. In fact, in hindsight, we both realized that even getting baptized ourselves was completely unnecessary for the purpose of making our child belong. She has to confront the fact that she is different and find her natural religious balance. Her (our daughter) relationship with God is her own. As parents, we have the unique privilege of guiding her, but it is up to God to call her.

Secondly, many aspects of traditional Christianity were incompatible with our belief system as a family and here’s why:

(1) The Life of Christ is very inspiring to us, and it is undeniable that if a person could live as he did, it is most definitely a successful life. However, the church spends the vast majority of time (in my perspective) on his death. I think you can say this about the Christian religion as a whole—remember, the resurrection gave birth to Christianity.

(2) The concept that those who have not accepted Christ go to hell, and in the alternative—those who truly accept Christ can be forgiven of their sins by that very acceptance.

(3) “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” —Mahatma Gandhi

If you are in the US, church is about politics too. We disagreed with much of the church’s conservative views and agenda—on homosexuality, on abortion, on birth control, on its view of the role of women etc.

However, this is just a personal experience. It is up to you to choose the right balance for your family. Please feel free to ask any questions to me and I will do my best to answer.

Thanks! —Bharti

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