aisha says: October 13, 2013 at 8:32 am
i m 18 years old girl who is dating a muslim guy i know my parents or his parents are not going to accept our relationship at any circumstances…but we still continue our relationship……
last week i asked him do you think i should change my religion……he told me only one thing if you wish to change u change otherwise no need at all and if it is concerned with my parents i will make them understand…but now after reading all these stories i m really getting scared plssss give me a solution should i continue the relationship or not…… -Aisha.
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Admin says:
For an 18 old, what ever he may say today out of romantic love may not stay after 6 months of marriage. You both are dependent on parents and things will change after parenteral pressure. Ideally, do not proceed unless both sets of parents accept your relationship. Do not plan to get married till you are done with your education and is financially independent. After marriage, do not plan for a child till you are sure for what you got into. A divorce is better than ruining your hole life.
How are you planning to get married to a Muslim? If you are in an Islamic country, Nikaah (after your Shahadah conversion) is a must. A Muslim-non-Muslim marriage cannot be registered (not valid) in most Islamic countries. If you are in India, consider the Special Marriage Act 1954 where you do not have to convert. However, even in India or the Western countries, the Muslim guy most probably will keep insisting on raising children only in Islamic faith and have them Arabic names only; and not at all raise by your birth religion (what ever your religion is). Basically, one or the other way, you must end your birth religious heritage and accept Islam as a new heritage/generation.
All we said about is true for majority Muslim boys, but does not apply to ALL. If you think your bf is different, then try these tests. Ask him:
1) Can our child be raised in my (Christian?, Hindu?) religion (and also in Islam, both)?
2) Can our children have non-Arabic names?
3) Take him to your religious institution (church or mandir) and ask him to pray your God(s) the way you do (see SRK, ask him to do the same). Like wise, reciprocate by visiting his Mosque with him and do what ever he does there. This test is to prove that you two can tolerate each other’s faith the way it is. Is not this logical?
4) Ask him what would he do if his sister is in love with a Hindu (or a Jew)? Will he support his sister’s love and against his parents?
Let us know what he replies to our questions raised above and we will discuss more later. Meantime read experiences of other girls.
Please do not misunderstood InterfaithShaadi-org. We do not have any agenda against any faith. We do not have any problem for what you wish to do, even if you decide to convert to Islam for your love. However, we wish you to make fully “informed” decision for you life, what ever that is. Best wishes. -Admin
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tamanna says: November 10, 2013 at 2:17 pm
Hie aisha…
Welcome to the family,.,,
First of all, congratulations for being in love….and experiencing its beauty….
And regarding the hindu muslim fact, please note that..muslims are very adamant on their religion…including my bf, except a few…
If you really wanna test him, do 1 thing…very casually ask him to accompany you to a temple,, or invite him in any pooja…dont force him but just see, how he behaves…if he accompanies you, you may keep roza for him on next ramzaan to show mutual respect,,, and if any case he refuses, you have all your answers in front of you….thats all dear…but dont ever……ever show any kind of disrespect to islam..otherwise the respect will not be reciprocal…
And if you want to take your religion to a new height, you may consider reading quran, and discuss it with him, ask him several question, but not all the negetives, ask him how he reads namaz, show him how ypu recite hanuman chalisa, or some shlok. This way you can spend a quality time with him and his expressions, and behavior will help you read his mind….and also..dont think that he will be able to make his parents understand….that never happens sweetheart,..they dont accept,..so, if you two are serious, talk it out,,, and I knw it takes hell lot of ups and downs to reach to a conclusion….all the best….and keep us updated…. -Tamanna
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aisha says: March 1, 2014 at 9:58 am
I m done ..I understood his (Muslim’s) true color what he wanted and everything and I stopped that relationship. now I m living happily..
if I wud have continued as you people said I would have cursed the moment I fell for him and cursed my self for spoiling my life as well as to ditching my parents. thank u sooooo much. -Aisha
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Hie aisha…
Welcome to the family,.,,
First of all, congratulations for being in love….and experiencing its beauty….
And regarding the hindu muslim fact, please note that..muslims are very adamant on their religion…including my bf, except a few…
If you really wanna test him, do 1 thing…very casually ask him to accompany you to a temple,, or invite him in any pooja…dont force him but just see, how he behaves…if he accompanies you, you may keep roza for him on next ramzaan to show mutual respect,,, and if any case he refuses, you have all your answers in front of you….thats all dear…but dont ever……ever show any kind of disrespect to islam..otherwise the respect will not be reciprocal…
And if you want to take your religion to a new height, you may consider reading quran, and discuss it with him, ask him several question, but not all the negetives, ask him how he reads namaz, show him how ypu recite hanuman chalisa, or some shlok. This way you can spend a quality time with him and his expressions, and behavior will help you read his mind….and also..dont think that he will be able to make his parents understand….that never happens sweetheart,..they dont accept,..so, if you two are serious, talk it out,,, and I knw it takes hell lot of ups and downs to reach to a conclusion….all the best….and keep us updated….
Aisha,
Your BF is trapping you just to enjoy seuxual pleasure for some time and thereafter put restrictions on you like wearing burqua, no movement as per your choice, eat BEEF, and soon he will bring another woman, because he is permitted to have 4 wives. If you resist, you will be beaten and thrown away to practice Halala.
So be careful. Such incidents are happening world wide.
Simple solution is to ask the guy to revert to Hinduism and then marry you. Ensure that he remains pure by offering prayers in temple, he can revert in any arya samaj temple, if you need more help just let me know.
Is there a web site or contact information?
Religion never mattered in love and it didn’t have any existence ever when two hearts love each other. Both of you must make your parents understand that you both won’t be able to be happy ever in life if not married. Instead of thinking about religion and useless rules, they must think about your happiness and the rest life as well. It is shocking to listen that in 21st century still people have thinking like this.
When did this started, “Religion never mattered in love”. We thought it does not matter for dating, but as soon as a time for wedding/nikaah, the Imam will demand religious conversion of non-Muslim. Are you not aware of it?
I advise Aisha to ask the parents of the boy whether they would accept her as their daughter in law or else after marriage she may be tortured by the in laws. Alternatively, she may depute her parents to talk to the parents of the boy to avoid any future problem.However if the marriage is solemnized under Muslim Marriage Act then she has to be reverted to Islam
Md.Zia-ul-Haque,Alim & Advocate
Dear Aisha
Don’t be stupid to lose your parents and loved one for one person or not worth it let alone to a muslim boy that mistake cant get bigger then this.
That religion does not accept any other religion to begin with. You can not stay married in your faith with man so that is not an option. secondly if you change your rwligion it will be end of your happiness. this love promises dies in few months anyways regardless what religion you are and scarificing all this for that does itreally sound clever.
And these men made religion where some one I heard voice from the divine and and Allah is there god with book from the air written by him is what they have to follow regardless if it is against humanity or womanity but you have follow it even though if they give ten meaning of same versus if it suits them depend on situation.
what you going to do imagine you are going to do if you go against your family and he doesnt and become good so muslim where woman are kept like slaves I am sure no muslim will accept this but practicaly this how itbis. then where will you end up go to you type in I cant recall name of yhe proggramme where they befriends hindu sikhs white girls groom them put them love illision and some time marry them. and trade them please google this girl grooming by muslims in uk you will see loads of this.
It is not worth it. no one knows better then me. they are Allah’s slave dont know there own created religion at all this religion only suits man there is nothing for woman and special another religion just maid and sex machine whenever they want not when you want
You have advised aisha not to loose your parents but why have you lost your parents?
Every Muslim is proud be the servant and slave of ALLAH
Md.Zia-ul-Haque,Ali & Advocate
go slow…where is life running….dont repent later
Be careful. Dont involving dating with him. You are innocent.
You will not stand no where cursing yourself for ever.
Once you are trapped for sexual purpose only, you will
repent whole life.
Forget him and stop dating him.
You will repent one day for your immatured decision.
As these christians(who had opposed independence of India) are repenting after independence of India for the reason that they were converted out of greed with the expectation to get special favor from christian Britishers who have been driven out by Muslim Hindu freedom fighters but no christian bastard ever joined freedom struggle.
Well william,did your father or any of your relatives join the freedom struggle.
Md.Zia-ul-Haque,Alim & Advocate
aisha dont be a fool.in initial years these guys say yes to everythn we girls say.later they show true colors.never in ur dream also think of converting to muslim.accept ur birth religion n be proud to be a part of it.u still are young.u have other options.dont get into trouble.dating n love are different.so stop wasting ur time and leave that guy.they are not trustworthy.sometime he will show his real face.which is harsh.so better finish it off now.
I m done ..I understood his true color wat he wanted and everything nd I stopped that relationship.now I m living happily..if I wud have continued as u people said I would have cursed the moment I fell fr him and cursed my self fr spoiling my life as well as ditching my parents.thank u sooooo muj
Aisha,
Tell us what was the reason you broke with that guy? We thought he was saying you do not have to convert?
Which country you are from? What is your birth religion?
Can you come to guide other girls in your situation on this site?